Just Trying to Forget the Pain
by firefox369
Summary: After defeating Naraku, Kagome is forced through the well and its sealed. Wanting to forget everything that happened, she vows to never use her powers again. After being caught in a barrier, though, she's forced to release them. What happens now? COMPLETE
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine!!!

This is in response to Kurama'sFoxyMiko's challenge!

Just Trying to Forget the Pain

Chapter 1

firefox369

Staring out at the morning sun, I turned to face Inuyasha as I sat in the middle of the field. This morning was one of the few mornings that he wasn't bossy and self-centered. He was thinking about what was about to happen, and what the results might be. Glancing at Sango, I saw her sharpening her katana and staring out in the distance. Miroku was beside her, writing down ofudas and also staring in to the distance. Sighing, I looked at my quiver and found that it was stuffed with arrows. I wouldn't be able to fit another one in there without destroying another. Returning my gaze to the sky, I saw the pinks, oranges, reds... all blending together to create a beautiful scene that seemed to be from a painting.

A figure made its way towards us and I recognized it as Sesshoumaru. I had forced Inuyasha to accept his help long ago, and although he wouldn't admit it, I knew that he was relieved that Sesshoumaru was helping us, too. Looking at the stoic lord, I gave a small smile but he ignored it. Glancing towards the horizon, he walked over to Inuyasha.

"The wolf is on his way. We'll leave once he gets here."

Inuyasha nodded grudgingly, but knew that it was best to listen to his half-brother. It wasn't very often that Sesshoumaru worked with others, and when he did, he expected to be listened to. Inuyasha learned that the hard way. I saw a small tornado in the distance and knew that Kouga had arrived. I picked up my bow and quiver of arrows and stood. Sango and Miroku looked at me, knowing that it was time. They gathered their items and prepared to leave. Pouring water and shoving dirt on to the fire, they watched as the smoke rose as it was muffled. When Kouga stopped in front of me, I saw that he was nervous too. He didn't begin his antics yet, and he was pale.

Sesshoumaru looked all of us over and turned around, walking into the nearby trees without making a noise. Sango got on top of Kirara and we followed after him, close behind. The world around us was a blur as we ran through the trees, ignoring everything except our thoughts, and our fear and hatred, of Naraku. We broke through into a clearing and I watched as the sky darkened around us. I was glad that I had left Shippo back at the village. I only hoped that he wouldn't be stubborn and decide to follow us.

I heard cold laughter and I looked around, trying to pinpoint where Naraku might be hiding, but to no avail. His voice was like thunder all around us, echoing off of everything, leaving our ears useless when trying to find him. Our eyes saw only the decoys, and our own voices would not draw him out. The only way would be to play along with him.

"How convenient..." he drawled, voice booming, "All my enemies crowded into one area... certainly makes it easier than hunting you all down one by one..." A swarm of demons appeared from the sky and I glared. He was sending waves, as usual. I watched as Sango pulled out her giant bomerang and as Miroku began to undo the beads around his hand. Kouga flexed his fingers, along with Sesshoumaru, and Inuyasha unsheathed his tetsusaiga. I stepped into the safety of the shadows and watched as the demons descended on them.

"Hiraikosu!" rang out and the bone sliced through a row of demons, slicing its way through another on its way back. Sango caught it with ease and unleashed it again. I saw Miroku using his wind tunnel on as many demons as he could before the others scattered, making it hard for him without sucking one of the others. He sealed it and swung his staff, bashing demons' skulls in with practiced ease, the rings jingling. A demon snuck up on Miroku but a flash of green cut it in half.

Sesshoumaru swiftly got rid of all the demons around him and was now working on the ones that remained. He movements were fluid and precise, not wasting a single bit of his youki.

"Kaze no Kizu!" Inuyasha roared and diamonds shot out of the large blade, destroying all the demons in his path. In contrast to Sesshoumaru, his movements were jerky, and wasted a lot of power, but did their job nonetheless.

Kouga growled and slashed the demons with his claws. They didn't even notice him because of his speed, so he took down many without much difficulty. Hearing a roar, I glanced at the neko youkai and saw her biting and slashing the demons, protecting her master from all harm. I hadn't done anything by the ending of the first wave, and none of the others seemed to be breaking a sweat. We might have actually had a chance at defeating Naraku.

"Is that all you've got, Naraku?" Inuyasha taunted and Kouga glared at him.

"Don't get cocky, Inuyasha, who knows what he might do."

Naraku's sadistic laugh rang through the air again and another wave of demons dove towards us. Before anyone could kill them, however, Miroku took his chance and sucked them all into his wind tunnel. Everyone looked at him and he smirked.

"Well they were all in a straight line, so why not?" he asked and Sango cracked a smile.

"It sure saved us a lot of trouble" she stated and Kirara nodded in agreement. Her eyes then widened in shock as a shadow stepped out of the trees on the other side of the clearing. "Kohaku?" she whispered but the boy didn't seem to hear her. His eyes were dull and glazed over with influence of Naraku's evil.

As another wave of demons showed themselves, Kohaku lunged at his older sister. She dodged and blocked his attacks, not wanting to hurt him. The others began to struggle a little as a one of Naraku's decoys appeared. They eventually defeated it, but Kohaku was still making attempts at injuring his sister when the third wave was beaten. That's when the real Naraku showed himself, shooting a tentacle towards Kohaku. Sango wouldn't take it though. Even though her brother wanted to kill her, she would still protect him. Jumping into the way of the tenacle, she took the blow instead of her younger brother. The appendage tore straigt through her heart, killing her instantly.

"Sango!!!" Miroku shouted as she fell to the ground. The tentacle had still succeeded on retreiving the jewel shards from Kohaku's back, however, and he screamed in pain as the blood oozed out of him. He fell to the ground beside his sister and crawled over to her, dying beside her. This angered me to no end. Pulling out my bow, I took an arrow from my quiver and knocked it, aiming towards Naraku.

"Die..." I hissed, releasing it. Naraku noticed and blocked it with an appendage, letting it burn off instead of dying himself. I continued to attack him, along with Inuyasha and the others, when a familiar scream was heard.

"Shippo..." I gasped and the small redheaded kitsune was held up. Inuyasha had just finished his Kaze no Kizu, though, and couldn't stop it from hitting the kit. I screamed and Naraku laughed, absorbing the small fox into himself. I scowled and aimed another at him. I fired, but Kouga didn't notice it and accidentally ran into it. He let out a scream of pain and turned into ash.

"Stop killing your allies, human" Naraku sneered and I felt my blood boiling. As Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha distracted him, I pulled out another arrow, and concentrated as much as my miko energy into the tip. I released it and it flew straight towards my target. I smirked as it hit him dead on. He screamed in pain as he slowly began to disintegrate and I sighed with a little bit of relief. He was finally gone. Coming out of the shadows, I finally got a full view of the battle field. It was dyed red with the spilt blood of demons, and I grimaced at the sight. I saw Inuyasha standing over Naraku's remains, Kouga's jewel shards in his hand. He picked up the part of the jewel that Naraku had and put them together.

"Are you going to become a human, Inuyasha...?" I asked softly and he glanced at me. His eyes were bleeding red. "...Inuyasha...?"

He smiled cruelly and ripped the shards off my neck, making the jewel whole again. It was tainted black with the youki emenating off of him.

"I wish to become a full-blooded-" he began but I felt my anger rising. Before I knew it, there was a large, bright flash of light and Inuyasha was just a pile of ashes on the ground. The jewel still floated in the air and just hovered their for a few seconds before shooting towards me. I screamed when I felt it enter me again, this time in my heart. I was then engulfed in blue and I was at the bottom of the well. I looked up and saw that the shrinehouse was where I now was. The ceiling blocked all light, so I was engulfed in darkness, the dank, humid feeling of the atmosphere sticking to my skin. The dust got up my nose and I stifled a sneeze.

Placing my hand over my heart, I felt a slight warmth as it glowed. The jewel had entered my heart. Realisation dawned on me. I was the protector of the jewel until the day I died. Remebering what the mass amount of demons that I had fought with Inuyasha, and Kikyo's past, I knew that I would never get rest again. I would die young, and endanger all of those around me... unless...

Standing up, I looked around the shrinehouse and smiled when I saw all the supplies that I needed. Gathering them, I took a handful of rice and drew a circle around me with them. With a match, I lit a few candles, and with a knife, I pricked my finger, letting it bleed. I shut my eyes and began to meditate.

_Is this what you really want, Kagome?_ a voice asked softly.

"Yes" I replied.

_Then your wish shall come true._

My eyes snapped open and I tried to release some of my miko powers. I smiled when nothing happened. I had sealed them. It would take a lot to break the seal, and I knew that if my miko powers were sealed, so were the powers of the Sikon no Tama. I was safe from whatever troubles the jewel would cause in this era for now.

Shakilly getting to my feet, I ignored the queasy feeling in my stomach when I saw my blood-soaked clothes. Images of Sango and Kohaku lying together in death appeared in my mind and I tried to forget it. Another image of Kouga turning into ash appeared and I shut my eyes, forcing myself to forget.

"Happy thoughts. Kagome, Happy thoughts..." I whispered. No such luck.

All the memories I had were from when Sango, Shippo and Inuyasha were still alive. Any thoughts about them right now just made my heart ache and a lump form in my throat.

Leaning against the wall for support, I made my way out of the shrinehouse and slid the door open to the outside world, and my front yard. Looking at the light blue sky, I sighed. So many things had happened in the last few hours... none of them anything that I wanted to remember.

I felt a lone tear roll down my cheek and I took a deep breath before shouting "I'm home!"

To be Continued...

End of chapter 1!! This is the first time I ever got into detail about Naraku's death, so sorry if its crappy.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Owns nothing!

Just Trying to Forget the Pain

Chapter 2

"Talking"

_Thoughts_

After I announced my coming home, my family burst out the doors of the house and ran over to me.

"Kagome!" my mother exclaimed, "What happened to you?! You're covered in blood and-"

"Did you finally kill Naraku?" my brother asked excitedly.

"Where's Inuyasha?"

"Tell me you're alright!"

"Was there lots of blood like in the movies?"

"Are you hungry?"

I looked at them both with sad eyes and they stopped interrogating me. Walking back into the house with them, I made my way upstairs and turned on the shower ignoring them both. I heard the phone ringing and left my mother and Souta to take care of it.

I stepped into the shower and felt the hot water raining down on me, wincing when I felt a searing pain in my leg. I shut my eyes at the sight. After a while, I opened my eyes and watched the pink, blood tainted water flow down the drain in a whirlpool of pink and clear. Separate at the start, the motion of the water made them blend together in a swirl of color near the drain. Shutting my eyes again, I sighed. Tilting my head up, I felt the water splatter against my face. The feeling reminded me of the blood that rained down on me and I gasped as my eyes shot open. I stepped back and looked around me. The water was still pink, and I felt my stomach lurch.

I quickly turned the shower off and dried myself, not daring to look at the towel. I slipped on some clothes and combed my hair before racing out of the bathroom. The heat, the moisture in the air... it was intoxicating. It reminded me too much of the baths I used to take with Sango. Flopping down onto my bed, I stared at the ceiling. I began to gall into a state of daydream when a knock on the door made me sit up with a start.

Getting up, I walked over to the door and opened it to see my mother.

"Kagome, your school just called" she said softly and I nodded.

"What did they say?" I asked.

"...your attendance record is lowering their reputation..."

"So they're going to kick me out" I ended and she slowly nodded.

"They've applied for you to go to another school, so you can continue your education. Strangely, they sent you to one of their rival schools so the classes you have will be about the same."

"Where is it?"

"Don't worry about that, they've paid for a house for you to live in and-"

"Where is it?"

"About a 4 hour train ride away..."

"I see..."

"They've already furnished and everything so you won't have to worry about that. All you have to worry about are your grades. The school has volunteered to pay for 1/3 of the cost, the rest you'll have to pay off yourself..."

I gave a small smile. "I'll manage... when should I start getting ready?"

This time my mom gave a nervous laugh. "Actually... the train's supposed to leave in half an hour..."

"WHAT?!?!" I shouted, racing past her. I had to get going!

"Make sure to call us!" she hollered after me and I gave a small smile. I was leaving my blood family after seeing my other family die just hours before... what a day... After making it to the train station, I realised that I didn't have a ticket and I groaned. How was I supposed to get on the train?

"Higurashi Kagome?" a man asked and I looked up. I slowly nodded. "If you would please follow me, the train is this way." I numbly obeyed and he led me onto the large train. Leading me to a seat, he left me. I sat down just as the train began to move. I was sitting alone, with no one around me. Why was everyone ignoring me? Leaving me alone? Had I done something wrong? Looking at my hands, I answered that question myself. I had killed two of my friends with my own two hands. Of course I had done something wrong. I had murdered.

Sighing, I stared out the window and watched as the sky slowly began to darken. The scenery also changed. We had long ago left the busy streets bustling with cars, and had entered an area of peace. Rolling hills covered the land. Shutting my eyes, I tried to fight back the memories threatening to break free. I didn't realise how long I had been struggling with them until I heard a voice informing that it was my stop from the speakers. I got up and left the train. Another man was there to greet me this time, and I followed him to a car. Not caring anymore, I got in. He shut the door behind me and got in the driver's seat, driving off. It began to rain. When he stopped, he explained that this was my house. I got out and he drove away, leaving me in the rain alone.

"And yet another person leaves..." I whispered bitterly, looking up to see the huge mansion in front of me. I stepped up to the gates and saw a wet envelope hanging off of them. I picked it up and opened it, finding a set of keys. Taking the key out, I unlocked the gates and stepped into the grounds of my new home. Looking up at the enormous home, I felt something pulling at my heart. What was I doing here...? I shut the gates and locked them, walking slowly up the long driveway. I felt my hair clinging to my form, along with my clothing, and I shivered when a cold wind blew by. Walking up the steps to the lone building, I touched the white door. I unlocked it and stepped inside. It was even bigger looking from the inside.

Wandering around, I eventually found my bedroom and stared into the darkness. I stepped in and saw a desk to my right, a large bed against the wall on my right, and large windows in front of me. The drapes were pulled back, revealing the dark gray sky and the falling rain. I looked in a walk-in closet and saw a few school uniforms and a pair of pajamas. I picked up the pajamas and changed into them, climbing into my bed. I just wanted to sleep the rest of the day away, the rest of the week, month... year... away. I didn't want to wake up from the calm bliss that was found in a dream.

I woke up when an unknown alarm clock sounded and I groaned as I sat up. Slamming the alarm down, I got up, ignoring the pain in my leg, and changed into a school uniform. Combing my hair and brushing my teeth, I decided to forgo breakfast. I didn't know when school started, afterall. Picking up a backpack that I found, I stuffed my keys inside and walked off. Walking outside, I felt a few drops of rain splatter on my skin from the day before and sighed. Locking the gates behind me after I made it off of the grounds of my home, I began to walk in the direction that I saw a few students walking in. Deciding to follow them, I walked after them, trailing behind them. They led me to the proper school in the end.

Once I got there, I made my way to the office and asked for my schedule.

"Ahh, yes. Miss Higurashi, was it?" the lady asked and I nodded.

"Hai."

"Here you go. Do you think you need any help getting to your classroom?"

Shaking my head, she gave me directions anyway. I followed her directions and ended up in front of a classroom labeled as class 9. Taking a deep breath, I opened the door and walked in. All the talking stopped and everyone looked at me for a few seconds before they returned to their conversations. A girl with pink hair and eyes skipped up to me.

"Hi! I'm Himeno! I've never seen you here before... are you new here?" she asked and I forced a smile.

"Yeah."

Her eyes lit up and she smiled laughed. "Cool!!! So am I! I just came here halfway through the schoolyear. Came about a month ago, but people still call me the 'new girl'."

I forced a laugh and played along with her. That's when the teacher came in and everyone went to their seats. "Okay class, we have a new student today-"

"Why are you wet?" a person blurted out.

"Because its raining outside..." I answered. "Dumbass..." I whispered.

"Ehhem. Her name is Higurashi Kagome and she transferred here, so I expect you to treat her nicely." He pointed to a desk. "There's an empty spot behind Himeno. Feel free to sit there." I nodded and went over to the pointed spot. Sitting down, the teacher once again cleared his throat. "Today, we will be continuing our lesson on the history of America."

Already bored, I pulled out a notebook and pencil, beginning to "take notes". My 'notes' compromised of a few sketches.

------------------------------------------------Himeno---------------------------------------------

When school finally ended, I was one of the last to walk out of the classroom, as usual. I skipped down the stairs and saw Sasame and the others waiting for me under umbrellas. I smiled and waved as I ran over to them, ignoring the cold rain.

"How was school, Himeno?" Sasame asked, handing me an umbrella, and I gave a huge smile as we walked out off school grounds, opening the umbrella and holding it over me.

"It was great! There's this new girl at our school and she's really nice!"

"Are you sure its not just an act, Himeno? We can't risk anything with Fenrir running around..." Hayate commented and I scowled.

"I'm absolutely positive!" My eyes suddenly lit up and I pointed at a girl with black hair and blue eyes. "Look! There she is!" I exclaimed. "Kagome!!!" I hollered but she didn't hear me, turning into a dark alley. I cocked my head to the side in confusion. "Where's her umbrella? and why's she going in there...?"

"I'll follow her" Sasame volunteered and he ran after her, his white hair falling into his eyes.

--------------------------------------------Sasame------------------------------------------

As soon as I saw her again, I slowed to a stop and staye a safe distance behind her. Following her, she made it out of the alley unscathed and turned down a street with a lot of large houses, but not nearly as large as Himeno's. I watched as she stopped in front of a set of black, iron gates, and slowly pulled out a set of keys. Sliding them into the lock, she unlocked the gates and left them unlocked behind her. Her hair clung to her face and body. She began her way down the long driveway and stumbled, falling over on to her side with a yelp. A small smile made its way on to my lips.

"Clumsy..." I laughed softly. All that changed when she slammed the ground with her fist. _What...?_

She gritted her teeth and struggled to her hands and knees. She strecthed out one of her legs and straightened so she was only on one knee. Pushing herself off the ground with a grunt, I caught a glimpse of a scar on her lower back. Standing up now, she winced and leaned on anything she could as she made her way to the door. Her uniform began to turn red and I felt alarm fill my body. Blood began to drip down her leg and she unlocked the door, leaning her head against it. She stayed like that for a few more moments before shoving the door open. Blood was running down her leg now, dying her socks and shoes red.

_Where is her family...? Don't they care...?_

Using his sense of sound, images filled his mind. The house was empty except for her and a few items. She walked into her room and sat down on a large bed. She didn't move for a while, just staring blankly at what was assumed to be a photo in a frame on the nearby counter. Then, curling into a ball, she began to tremble. The blood bled into her sheets but she didn't seem to notice.

"Happy, Kagome..." she whispered. "Think happy... no crying... that's right... crying is bad... be strong..."

She looked up and Sasame 'saw' a single tear rolling down her cheek.

"No!" she hissed. "Don't think about them! They're gone...! They're gone..."

_I think I've heard enough..._ Sasame sighed and left, leaving the strange girl alone. He would ahve to tell everything he saw to Hayate, but for some reason he felt as though it should've been kept a secret.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I owns nothing!

Just Trying to Forget the Pain

Chapter 3

----Kagome----

The random ringing of an alarm clock woke me up once again and I smacked the 'snooze' button before shutting my eyes again. Pulling my covers tighter around me, I curled into a ball and was about to fall back asleep when the alarm went of again. Giving a low growl, I slammed the the alarm off and sat up, drowsilly staring at the wall in front of me.

"Stupid alarm clock..." I mumbled and pulled the covers off, shivering when the cold air surrounded my body. Scooting over to the edge of my bed, I gingerly stood up, careful about the painful injury on my leg. I gasped when my feet touched the cold ground. Gritting my teeth and forcing myself not to pull my feet back up onto the bed, I limped over to the closet and opened it. Taking out a school uniform, I slipped it on. Looking in the mirror when I was done I gave a small sigh. I didn't want to go to school, but I didn't want to stay in this horrifyingly large house, either.

Pulling back the shades, the golden sunlight illuminated the entire room, making the dark colors suddenly turn alive. The dark grays turned into whites and the pale blues were now beautiful hues of turquoise and sapphire. But I couldn't make myself become happy or excited at the sight. It was just kind of... there... I change didn't make a difference in my eyes. Sure it was prettier, but I was still alone. That was something that colors alone couldn't change.

Slowly stumbling down the stairs to the kitchen, I decided to skip breakfast again and I grabbed my school supplies, walking to school again. Seeing the alley that I went through the day before, I decided to go through it again. Nothing had happened to me last time, afterall. It should be safe to go through.

Stepping into it, I let myself limp a little bit. Walking past one section, I felt an uncomfortable feeling surround me and I began to walk faster. When the feeling still didn't go away I began to run, ignoring the pain in my leg. Glancing back to see if there was really anything following me, I ran into something and fell backwards, landing on my butt. I grumbled as I struggled to my feet and I saw a man Keeping Himeno from falling over from the impact. He had black hair and blue eyes.

"G-gomen nasai, Himeno..." I stammered and gave a small bow. "I didn't see you there."

"Oh! Kagome!" she exclaimed. "Its okay!"

"Are you alright, Himeno?" I asked and she nodded.

"I'm perfectly fine! No harm done!"

Giving a small sigh of relief, I quickly said another apology and was about to walk away when I felt her grab my arm. I looked back at her, confused.

"Why don't you walk with us to school, Kagome?" she suggested and I gave a small smile.

"Sure, why not."

With that, I hid the pain that I felt in my leg and forced myself not to limp as I walked to school with Himeno. I found out that the man that was with her was named Hayate, and that he worked for her father in the estate. For some reason, I felt like he didn't really trust me at all. His gaze was cold every time he looked at me, and I tried to ignore the feeling that he absolutely hated me.

I was relieved once we got to school, the looks that Hayate gave me were absolutely terrifying. It was a glare that even Sesshoumaru might have trouble defeating. Now that's scary. As Himeno said her goodbyes to the man, I walked into the school and sat down at my desk, putting my head down. I wanted to get a few more minutes of sleep before school started. Too bad I didn't really get a chance, though. Right when I put my head down a wad of paper hit my head. Growling as I lifted my head, I saw the paper on the desk beside me. Picking it up and uncrumpling it, I read what it said. The words on it made my blood boil. Ripping the letter into tiny little pieces, I threw it in the trash can. A whimper from behind me mad me glare at the thing that made the noise. A boy.

He had black hair and violet eyes that reminded me so much of...

"Miroku...?" I asked and the boy looked at me, shocked.

"How did you know my name?" he questioned cautiously and I shook my head.

"Sorry. You just look a lot like a friend I used to have."

"Oh. Hey, w-"

"I will not bear your child" I interrupted and his head dropped.

"Dangit..." he sighed, snapping his fingers to add on to the effect. I couldn't help but feel a small feeling of warmth enter my body at the sight. Miroku had been reincarnated and was in my time, and in the same class that I was in. As I watched his friends teasing him, I gave a small smile. I would watch him from afar this time. I didn't want to become too entangled in his life again. Some things I never wanted to be repeated again, especially when I still got the feeling that there were still demons floating around.

"Settle down, class!" the teacher hollered over us and we all went back to our seats. I noticed that Himeno wasn't in the seat in front of me. When the teacher called out her name, there was no answer. This confused me. I had walked to school with her just now, why wasn't she in class? She should have had plenty of time to get in her seat...

"Gomen nasai!" I heard her voice shout out as the door slammed open. Her face was flushed, as if she had been running a lot.

"Go to your seat, Himeno" the teacher sighed, marking her off as tardy.

"Hai."

As she sat down in fron to of me, I noticed that something wasn't quite right with her.

"Are you okay, Himeno?" I asked and she looked back at me.

"Hai. I'm okay. Just kind of tired is all."

She turned back around and began to listen to the lecture that the teacher was giving us about the forming of the american government. Once again, I began to 'take notes' again. The pictures I drew were of the feudal era. I drew the goshinboku (sp?) tree and Kaede's village. I drew Kirara, and Shippo, too. Gosh, I missed them.

---------------After School---------------

After school had let out, I quickly packed my things and raced out of the school, gritting my teeth to keep from crying out from the pain that shot through my leg. I was just out of the school when I saw a familiar man leaning against the front gates. I slowed to a stop when he looked at me. It was the guy from earlier today. What was his name? Oh yeah. Hayate.

"Hello Hayate" I said sweetly as I walked past him.

"Stop right there, girl" he commanded and I turned around to face him. I gave him a smile.

"Yes?"

"Who are you?"

"My name is Kagome Higurashi... you should know that by now" I replied, confused.

"Drop the act. Who are you, really?" he demanded. This confused me even further.

"Wha...?"

"What do you want with Himeno?"

"Whoa, I'm just a student that got transferred here because of my horrible attendance record! I have no clue what you're talking about!" I complained and he stepped towards me, grabbing my arm. When I slapped his hand away, there was a large flash of white and I was propelled backwards. I couldn't help but yelp when I landed on my injured leg, reopening the wound. I struggled to my feet, covering it with my hand. The man stared at me in shock as I turned around and began to run away as fast as I could despite the pain I felt.

"Hello Hayate!!" I heard Himeno chirp as she walked out of the school.

That was when I felt it. I felt my miko powers leaking out of the seal and surrounding me. Scowling, I tried to force it back in but it was no use. How had the man broken the seal? How had he broken the seal that the SHIKON had made? Something wasn't right. Something had gone wrong with the ceremony. The seal wasn't supposed to break!

-----Meanwhile-----

A sudden beeping surrounded me and I knew that something was wrong. Clicking out of the other programs on the computer, I saw a beeping dot where a sudden rise of energy had occured. The dot was moving, too...

"What happened, Kei?" a kid with grayish blue hair and blue eyes asked.

"I'm not sure, Mannen...there's been a sudden rise of energy..." I commented and I watched as it stopped. Clicking on the area, I recognized it as...

"That's where Go works!" the kid, Mannen, exclaimed and I nodded.

"Fetch Hajime and Shin, that amount of energy is a demon larva magnet. We need to go." Another beeping was heard and I scowled. "Speak of the devil, there the larva is now..."

-----Kagome-----

Slowing to a walk when I felt the blood dripping down my leg, I noticed that I was in the center of a the outside seating area of a cafe. I was debating whether or not to ask if I could use their bathroom to wash my wound when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I spun around, gasping.

"Would you like something, miss?" a man asked and I gave a small smile. He had brown and red hair.

"I-ie, I'm fine" I stammered and he gave me a weird look.

"Okay, then..." He suddenly tensed and I watched as his face darkened. I saw everyone around me dropping to the ground, and I felt my energy being drained from me.

"What the...?"

A loud roar was heard and I turned to see a demon. I gave a slight groan when I saw it. I knew that the shikon would bring me trouble the moment that it made itself known. It reached out to grab me but the appendage was suddenly burned off. I looked to see the waiter in a completely different outfit, a flame in his hand.

"Why are you after her? Shouldn't you be after me? You stupid larva!" he shouted but the creature kept aiming towards me.

"Beyondios!" I heard a kid shout and vines shot out of the ground, creating a barrier. The surrounding sudenly changed, and it was almost as if we were in space.

"Wha...?" I began, confused.

"Himeno! Can you see the weak point?" a kid asked and I saw Himeno. She was in a funky costume, too.

"I can't tell where it is!"

More appendages shot towards me and I tried to move but I couldn't. The pain in my leg overpowered all of my senses. A ball of light quickly got rid of the things and I looked up to see another person with blonde hair and tanned skin hovering over me.

"Shin! How is this person in the barrier?!?!" he demanded and a small kid with blonde hair looked at him.

"Huh?"

They were both suddenly knocked over and more tentacle like things shot towards me. Feeling anger boiling up inside of me, I struggled to my feet and purified the tentacles to ash.

"DAMMIT!" I shouted, pointing at the demon larva, and everyone looked at me. "I THOUGHT THAT I WAS DONE WITH ALL OF YOU STUPID DEMONS!!!!"

"Kagome...?" Himeno gasped as more tentacle flew towards me and my anger fueled my powers, making them stronger.

"JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!" I screamed, my powers flaring around me, and the tentacles all burned off before they could even get close. Before I knew what I was doing, I created a bow and arrow out of the energy and aimed at the demon larva. "Die" I hissed, releasing the arrow. The demon larva turned to ash before the arrow even reached it. I stood there, panting out of anger, and realised what I just did.

The area returned back to normal, and I was back outside of the cafe again. This time, however, Hayate, Himeno, the waiter, and a lot of other people that I saw fighting were staring at me questioningly. The only noise was the rustling of the leaves and the dripping noise of my blood dripping onto the cement.

"Oops..." I whispered under my breath.

To Be Continued...


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

I know that some people are ondering what xover this is and I kept on forgetting to say it so here it is now. This story is a Pretear/Inuyasha crossover.

Just Trying to Forget the Pain

Chapter 4

------Kagome------

"K-Kagome...?" Himeno stammered and I gave a small laugh, stepping back.

"Y-yes?" I replied timidly.

"Su... sugoi...!" a kid whispered in awe and I turned to see said kid. He had blueish gray hair and blue eyes.

"This isn't the time, Mannen..." the man with blonde hair and tanned skin stated.

"Oh, shut it, Kei! I know that you think that what just happened was cool too!" the kid, Mannen, argued.

"You call a random person making a demon larva turned to ash with some weird move cool?" the waiter asked.

"You're just jealous that you can't do it with your flame, Go!" Mannen retorted.

"Stupid kid..." Go growled out, clenching his hand in a fist.

"What did you do to the thing, Kagome...?" Himeno asked again and I looked at her. The argument stopped. Everyone wanted to hear my answer.

"What are you talking about?" I questioned, trying to act as if nothing ever happened.

"How did you kill the demon larva so easilly?" she clarified.

"Huh?" I stated, faking stupidity.

"Stop acting stupid. You know what we're talking about" Hayate demanded and I felt a vibrating in my backpack. This would be one of the few times that I would actually be excited about getting call while I was talking about important matters. If this could be counted as important, that is. Taking the cell phone out of my backpack, I held it up to my ear.

"Hello?" I answered. The looks they gave me made me feel uncertain and helpless.

"_Kagome_?" a voice answered and I felt my blood run cold.

"...why are you calling me...?" I whispered, shocked. How had he gotten my number?

_"I was the one that got you transferred to where you are now. I'm also the one paying the bills for your house."_

"...how very kind of you..." I growled and a small chuckle was heard on the other side. It wasn't happy.

_"I have a favor I need to ask you so-"_

"Hold on a sec." Looking up at the group I gave a small smile and waved. "This is a really important phone call so if you don't mind, I'll just be going home now..."

"Hey! Wait! You didn't answer my que...stion..." The last words trailed off as I raced into a nearby alleyway.

"Okay. What do you want with me?" I hissed and I felt a shiver run down my spine again.

_"Demon to your right."_

Glancing to my right, there was a small, wierd-looking shell type of thingy with a jewel in the middle. I purified it and felt the tense feeling immediately disappear. I continued running towards my home after that.

"Now that that's taken care of, what do you want with me? And how the hell do you know all of this crap?"

_"Don't underestimate me, Kagome. I'm not like that stupid hanyou."_

"That 'stupid hanyou' was your half-brother Sesshoumaru, or did you already forget?" I argued.

_"I didn't forget. Now, back to the favor I need you to do."_

"Why would the 'oh-so-powerful' Lord of the Western Lands need my help with anything?" I spat.

_"Because I can't kill some of the things I want to."_

"_You_? The ice prince? You've changed."

_"Things change after 500 years, Kagome."_

"Why are you calling me by me first name?"

_"Because I know that it's the only way you'll listen to me."_

"Ahhh, you've grown some brains."

_"Do not test my patience, human."_

"THERE'S the Sesshoumaru I know. Okay, what are you so desperate to ask of me, _milord_?" I teased as I burst into the sunlight and out of the dark alleyway.

_"Woman, you-"_

"I know, I know. I'll stop now. What do you want?"

_"There are some people in the city you're in now that use some sort of magic to kill certain demons called demon larva. Those were the people that you just had a run-in with. I've given you some information on them and dropped it off at your house."_

"What do you want me to do?"

_"Help them and protect them. Wander the streets and I'll tell you where the seeds are."_

"Seeds?"

_"A demon seed is the form that a demon larva takes before evolving."_

"Oh."

_"I need you to destroy them."_

"Why?"

_"It will give me time to prepare for Fenrir's arrival."_

"Fenrir...?"

_"Nevermind, human. That information will come in the mail today. I expect to see you over here tomorrow morning. Skip school. Oh, by the way. I got your things moved in while you were in school."_

"W-wait a minute, how will I know where you are?"

He already hung up by the time I finished asking. Letting out a low growl of distaste, I stopped once I reached the gates to my house. Unlocking them, I sighed and limped into the yard and into the house. I froze in shock when I shut the door behind me.

"...he really did move all of my things in..." Walking to a small table, I noticed a manila envelope on it. Picking it up, I slowly began to open it when a flash of red caught my eye. Setting the envelope back down, I walked over to a picture frame hanging on the wall and saw a picture of everyone and me in the feudal era. Everyone was smiling except for Inuyasha, how had his arms crossed and was pouting as he looked away from the camera. Gently touching it, I felt a lump rising in my throat. Forcing the lump away I moved back to the table and picked up the manila envelope again, tearing it open. Looking inside, there were lots of papers. I groaned. Paperwork. Taking it out, I saw a picture of Himeno on the front.

-----Himeno-----

"...something's not right here..." I mumbled as I watched Himeno leave. I looked at Sasame and he nodded, taking my hand. After we finished preting, I shut my eyes and listened for Kagome. She had already finished her phone conversation and was looking at a picture on te wal. I couldn't tell what it was, though. She then moved over and sat down by a small table, picking up a manila envelope. Ripping it open, she looked inside and groaned. The papers rustled as she took them out and she began to read.

"Himeno..." I read, "Age: 17... Hobbies: martial art, gardening... after mother's death, father remarried and she was thrust into high-class society... Pretear...? What the heck is that?"

"What...?" I whispered and Sasame quieted me so we could hear her better. She flipped to the second page.

"Hayate... Age: unknown... hobbies: unknown... Works part-time for Himeno's father... Leafe knight of wind... Weapon when fused with pretear: wind sword... OH! I get it now!!!" Flipping over to the next page again, she read it in silence.

Separating from Sasame, we told the others everything that we overheard.

"So nee-chan can't be trusted...?" Mannen whined and he let out a whimper. "I liked her... she was cool, too..."

"You're hiding something, Hayate..." Sasame murmured and Hayate looked at him.

"That girl... she had the same reaction to me as Himeno" Hayate stated.

"What do you mean?" I asked, slightly confused.

"When she touched my hand there was a bright flash of light and we were thrown away from eachother" he explained.

"Are you saying that she's another pretear?" Go questioned.

"I don't know what it means, but there should only be one pretear at a time. That means that either Himeno lost her abilities, which we know that she hasn't, or that girl is one of _them_."

"Them...?" I inquired. Hajime, Mannen, and Shin all asked the same.

"...She is either Fenrir or the gaurdian. But the guardian should've died long ago. The last anyone saw of her was 500 years ago, she couldn't have survived this long" Go commented.

"...but even Fenrir can't destroy a demon larva like that..." Kei mumbled.

I sat by, listening to their conversation in confusion. Just like the kids beside me, I was completely lost.

----Kagome----

"How am I supposed to protect them if I don't know a thing about them?!?!" I shouted in frustration and the phone rang. Running over to it, I picked it up. "Hello?" The color drained from my face and the phone dropped out of my hands just moments later. grabbing my keys, I raced out of the house and towards the train station. I had to get home!!!

After getting on the train, I sat impatiently, fidgeting, for four hours, and once I got to my spot I shot off the train and raced towards the hospital. Running to the front desk, I asked where Souta Higurashi was and she directed me to the proper room. Walking inside, I saw my enitre family on hospital beds.

"...what happened?" I whispered.

"Fenrir" a deep voice resounded behind me and I spun around with a gasp.

"S-shesshoumaru?" I stammered.

"They aren't dead, Kagome. You can still save them."

"How?"

"Easy. Once Fenrir is defeated, all the life that she stole returns to the boies that they came from. Kill Fenrir, save your family."

"...oh..."

"I expect to see you tomorrow morning. I'll send a car to your home in the morning to pick you up."

"What are you going to do to me...?" I asked and he turned around.

"We're going to train" he replied and I slowly nodded.

"...okay..."

"Don't worry, I'll use tenseiga so you won't die." With that, he walked out the door, leaving me to my thoughts.

'...what changed you so much, Sesshoumaru...? what happened while I was gone...?' Glancing back at my family, I let out a small sigh. 'Looks like I have no choice but to do what Sesshoumaru tells me to...'

To be Continued...

-------------------------------------

I know this chapter kind of sucks compared to the others but I'M SORRY!!!


	5. Chapter 5

Just Trying to Forget the Pain

Chapter 5

"Talking"

'Thoughts'

------------------Kagome------------------

It was dark... it was so dark and cold... I couldn't even see my own hand when it was right in front of my face... Where was everyone? I felt so scared... so alone... Where was I? Why was this area like this...?

"This is what the world is like to you, Kagome..." Naraku's voice rang out and I felt a shiver run down my spine.

"What do you mean...?"

"The world is black and dark. You are alone and you know it, but you don't want to accept it... everyone is dead because of you, Kagome... you were the one that murdered them all..."

"No! It was an accident! I didn't mean to...!"

"It's your fault I'm dead, Kagome..." Kouga blamed as he appeared right in front of me.

"N-no, it's not! You were the one that ran into the arrow that I shot! It's not my fault!"

"Because of you, I never got a chance to tell Miroku how I felt..." Sango hissed as she also appeared. I shook my head.

"No... I-"

"Because of you, I had to live the rest of my life alone!" Miroku growled as he popped up behind me.

"If you hadn't broken the Shikon Jewel into tiny little pieces, I would have turned into a full-blooded demon instead of dying as a hanyou" Inuyasha snarled.

"I died young because I met you!" Shippo shouted and I stared at them all in horrow. A smirking Naraku appeared and I pointed at him.

"You!" I screamed, "you did this!"

He chuckled and looked at my friends. "But this is their opinion of you now, Kagome. I didn't do anything to change their thoughts. This is how they really feel."

"I don't believe you, Naraku! Release them from whatever spell you placed on them!"

"I already told you, Kagome, they aren't under any spell..."

"I don't believe you!"

"It's the truth..."

"No! They would never say that about me!"

"...miko..." a voice echoed and I recognized it as Sesshoumaru's.

"S-Sesshoumaru?" I stammered and I heard an all too familiar growl that came from him. Why couldn't I see him...?

"Wake up!!!!"

My eyes shot open and the first thing I saw were emotionless gold eyes. Letting out a high-pitched scream, I hopped to my feet and jumped back, pointing at the owner of the molten orbs. Opening my mouth to speak, I realised that I was at the edge of the bed and that my right foot was slipping. I screamed once again as I fell off the bed and my back hit the cold tiled floor. I let out a hoarse groan from the feeling of having the wind knocked out of me.

"Good morning, woman" Sesshoumaru stated as he stood over me. Forcing my eyes open, I pointed at him.

"You!" I hissed and he raised a delicate eyebrow.

"Yes, miko?"

"How did you get in?!"

"I was the one that bought the house, human. Naturally, I would also have a set of keys" he mused, dangling a set of keys from his pointer finger. I glared at him.

"Gimme" I commanded, sitting up and reaching for them. He easilly moved them out of my range.

"Prepare to leave."

"Not until I get those keys."

"You will get the keys if you complete your training today, miko. Now prepare to leave."

"But-"

"NOW."

I squeaked and quickly nodded as he turned around. Scrambling aorund the room, I picked out an outfit that was easy to move around in. He left the room as I changed and dragged me out of the house right after, making me skip breakfast.

"Hey! I haven't had breakfast in the last two days! You have to let me eat something!" I whined as I began to struggle. After I became too troublesome to just drag, he lifted me up and slung me over his shoulder.

"You will survive another day without your morning meal, woman."

"Hey! Put me down you old coot!" I screamed as I pounded his back with my fists and tried to kick him. When it didn't do anything I snorted my distaste and pouted, resting my head on my hands as I used Sesshoumaru's back as a prop to place my elbows on.

"Stupid mutt youkai bringing me to places that I don't want to go to when I should be in school..." I grumbled and I felt his grip on me painfully tighten. I winced. "Okay, okay! I'm sorry!" When it loosened I muttered some colorful language aimed at the inuyoukai and his grip tightened again. "Ow! Ow ow ow ow ow ow ow! I'm sorry! It won't happen again!"

"If it does I will be sure to use my claws." I grimaced at the thought and stopped my ranting, deciding to release my anger by glaring at the pedestrians that stared at us like we were crazy as they walked by. At the sight of my gaze they quickly looked away and tried to ignore us. I heard some giggling and turned to see two girls whispering behind the cover of their hands as they looked at us.

"You can put me down, I swear I won't run away..."I sighed and he dropped me. I landed on my feet and quickly ran in front of him walking backwards so that I could face him.

"How much farther do we have to go?" I asked but he ignored my question.

"I would stop before you get hit by that human on the bike" he commented and I stopped and turned around just as a guy on a motorcycle zoomed past me, inches in front of my body. I blinked stupidly and looked back at Sesshoumaru, shocked.

"You've really changed."

"As I said before, 500 years can change many things, including me."

"You've barely aged at all..." I commented as he walked past me. This time I walked beside him. I felt short as his tall frame towered over me.

"Looks don't have to change in order for the person inside to, miko. You, of all people, should know that."

"I know, but-"

He grabbed my arm and shoved me in front of him. I blinked again when I noticed that I would have run into a wooden post if had continued the path that I was taking.

"Thanks..."

He ignore me again and opened a gate, stepping inside and expectin me to follow. I did and he led me through a huge driveway, up at least 5 sets of steps, and into a large white house. Then, he made his way down way too many corridors to count and we ended up in a dojo. He walked over to a wall and took down two kendo sticks. Finally turning around to face me, he tossed me one. I caught it and stared at it awkwardly, trying to figure out how to hold it. When he saw me having troubles he walked over and stood in front of me, staring at me with a gaze that made me VERY uncomfortable.

"You don't know anything about swords, do you?" he asked and I gave a nervous laugh.

"No, not really..."

Moving behind me, he positioned my hands in the correct spot and told me how to stand. He then walked back in front of me.

"Stay in this position for the next hour or two."

"WHAT?!?!?" I screamed and he glared.

"If you stay in it long enough, then this position will become muscle memory, allowing you to automatically start in this posi-" he suddenly began to cough, covering his mouth, and I cocked my head to the side, confused.

"I didn't know that youkai could get sick..." I mumbled. His coughing worsened and I began to worry. "Are you okay...?" I asked timidly but he didn't seem to hear me. Blood made its way through his fingers and I felt my eyes widen in surprise. Dropping the kendo stick, I raced over to his side as he fell to his hands and knees, panicking. "What do I do? What do I do? What do I do?" I repeated over and over again. I pulled out a handkerchief (sp?) from my pocket and wiped off some of the blood with it. I gave it to him and he took it.

"Get... my medicine..." he coughed.

"Where is it?"

He weakly pointed to a cabinet on the other side of the dojo and I raced over to it, flinging the doors open. Looking at the shelves, I blinked stupidly when I only saw one small bottle when there were five, very large shelves to place things on. Sesshoumaru's coughing drove me out of my thoughts and I grabbed the bottle. There was suddenly a loud groan that came from him and I raced over to him. He looked at me and struggled to his feet, racing out of the dojo and slamming the door behind him.

"...huh...?"

There was suddenly a loud explosion and I began to panic again.

"...don't tell me that Sesshoumaru just blew up..." I mumbled as I ran over to the doors and tried to open them. They began to open but a sudden force slammed them closed again.

"I'm fine, woman!" Sesshoumaru's voice hollered through the door. Something was different about it though...

"Do you want your medicine or no?"

"It's too late for the stupid medicine, miko!"

I stopped trying to open the door and after a while, I heard Sesshoumaru's arm move away from the door too. I took this chance and slammed the door open to recieve a face full of smoke. I coughed and waved it out of my face. When all the smoke cleared, I covered my mouth and stifled a laugh.

"Y-you're..." I choked out as I began to tremble from holding back my laughter and squeals.

"Silence" he stated, staring at me with his annoyed eyes.

"ADORABLE!!!!!" I squealed as I tackled him. I felt him struggling beneath me and I laughed.

"Get off of me, woman..." he growled.

"You're so CUUUTE!!!!"

"I said Get. Off!" he snarled, squirming out of my grasp. He hopped away from me and landed a few feet away. He glared at me with his large gold eyes and I could tell he was having trouble hiding a pout on his childish face. I continued to laugh and his resolve finally broke, making him 'hmph' as he crossed his arms and pouted, glaring at me sourly.

"Oh... oh my god...!" I panted in between laughs, "this... is so hil...arious...!"

His glare began to fade and he stared at the ground as his arms began to go limp. "I can't contol my emotions in this form..." he said softly and my laughing immediately stopped.

"Huh?"

"I can't control my emotions in this form" he repeated, looking at me now. He looked...sad...?

"You okay?" I asked, stepping closer to him. I saw tears building up in his eyes and I didn't know whether to laugh or feel sorry for him. But... he looked so scared...

--------Sesshoumaru--------

I hated being in the body of my younger self. I couldn't control my emotions at all, and I act the way I did at that time... which makes me frustrated... especially when I was always crying at that age... and running to my mother... feeling the tears roll down my face, I snorted in my mind and waited for the time period to pass until I felt a hand on my cheek. My eyes widened in surprise, both the one in my mind and the body that held me captive, and I saw Kagome wiping my tears away. Shutting my eyes, I let her wipe away the tears rolling down my cheek, relaxing. I fell to my knees and she sat down in front of me. She gently wrapped her arms around my body.

'Don't touch me, Miko...'

But what she did, along with my body, were things that I couldn't control. Because my younger self was temporarily in control of my body, I couldn't do anything but watch from the sidelines. Surprisingly, however, no matter how much I thought I didn't like her touch, it was amazingly comforting.

Feeling my younger counterpart leaning against her, I got a glimpse of it's thoughts. He was scared. No, scared was an undersatement. Terrified. He didn't want to be alone and seeked comfort and protection from Kagome. I recalled the times when I had transformed and no one was around. He was always wandering around, trying to find someone so that he wouldn't be alone anymore, but not finding anyone. This time, there was actually someone _here_... and that made him beyond ecstatic. The unnerving thing was that he thought of Kagome as family. The good thing was that he thought of Kagome as a sister, and not a mother.

'I'll accept her comfort for now, then... just to humor my younger self...'

I felt him drifting off into sleep, dragging me along with him.

'No. You are not bringing me into that horrid world of sleep of yours, child. You will _not_ drag me there. I refuse to go. I _will not_ go to that world of your unrealistic fantasies. Release me!'

The child didn't listen, though, and forced me into his horrible imagination.

---Kagome---

I felt Sesshoumaru's breathing even out and I looked down at him. What had caused him to turn into this? It must have been a spell, because if it were a sickness, it would be newly discovered... So if it were a spell, who had been the one to cast it on him? Who had temporarily turned Sesshoumaru into a child...?

There was another explosion, and we were both surrounded in smoke. I felt him growing and knew that he was changing back into his adult form... that meant that...

'Oh no...'

When the smoke finally cleared, my fears had been confirmed. The older version of Sesshoumaru was sleeping... his head on my collarbone and my arms wrapped around his shoulders... and I couldn't move without waking him up...

'What have I done...?'

I gave a small whimper of fear, terrified of what he would do to me when he finally escaped the world of darkness that he had disappeared into.

"Release me, woman..." he suddenly commanded as he shifted. Apparently I didn't have very long to wait.

'I'm so dead...'

To Be Continued...


	6. Chapter 6

Just Trying to Forget the Pain

Chapter 5

"Talking"

'Thoughts'

------------------Kagome------------------

Okay... here I am... inside of Sesshoumaru's house... that thought alone makes me scared... Okay. I'm supposed to be training with him... that makes me even _more_ scared... but the fact that Im sitting on the ground holding him is so terrifying that I'm about ready to piss my pants. Now that he's _awake_, the only thing controlling my bladder was the thought of what the Lord would do if I pissed on _him_ too.

"I said 'release me'."

Realising what I was doing, I immediately let go and scrambled a good distance away, cowering in fear of what he might do to me. I opened my eyes a crack and saw him standing up, his silver hair falling in front of his face as he did so. When he had stood up completely his hair fell back into place, revealing the crescent moon that sat daintilly upon his forehead. I couldn't help but feel a little jealous of his hair. It was soft and silky from what I felt, with no knots whatsoever.

"...gomen nasai, Sesshoumaru... I wasn't thinking..." I whispered, trying to apologize before he sliced my head off.

"It's fine" he mumbled and my eyes widened in surprise. Did he just say that 'it's fine'? Relief washed over me when I was sure that was what he said. Standing up, I followed him back into the dojo and picked up the kendo stick again to continue practicing. I agreed to stay in the position from earlier, but only if he would explain what was going on. He agreed and that was where I was now: in a fighting stance with Sesshoumaru leaning against the wall, observing me while explaining what had transpired the years after I had left.

"All was fine for a long time after you had supposedly died... the monk had eventually found a mate and had many kids. Despite his past, he was happy. After a while the wolf mated with... Ayame, I believe her name was... and his pack grew strong. I, however, continued to roam the western lands, protecting it, until the humans came up with more dangerous weapons, and began to despise all demons. They hunted us all down, and few of us remain... They had many raids on my castle... Rin was unfortunate enough to be caught in one of them and she died... Afterwards I disguised my markings and roamed the lands as a human, concealing my youki and hiding my swords under my clothing.

After a while, the world became more technologically advanced and I started many businesses over time. They were a huge success, and I had to fake death many times in order to make it seem like I was actually human. Under the human's control, most eventually fell and I had to start from scratch. It was during about my sixth business that I began to feel as if something were searching for me, almost hunting me down. I saw a group of people called the 'Leafe Knights' and saw how they hunted low-level demons.

Apparently they knew that something was wrong with me and they fought against me. I had easilly defeated them, but the person called 'Takako' hunted me down and cast a curse on me somehow. That's why I turn into a child now. It happens at random intervals, but I can be expected to get an attack at least once a day. It has been getting worse recently. There has also been a rise of youki in the area. This has me believing that the amount of youki affects how many times I turn into a child. If there is enough, I might just permanently turn into my younger self until the amount of youki has lowered."

"And that's why you need my help..." I mumbled and he nodded.

"I ask for your help because I cannot defeat enough demons in my weakened state. Also because I don't know when I'll next turn into a child. It might happen in the middle of a battle. If I turn into a child, I will be completely defenseless. The ability to control my youki didn't come until I was twice as old as I am when I transform."

"I see..."

A long silence soon fell and I just concentrated on the stance, trying to ignore everything that Sesshoumaru had said until my training was over. He had a good reason to want help, and I had no choice but to help him. It didn't seem like very long before Sesshoumaru stopped leaning on the wall.

"It's been two hours. Sit down. Meditate" he commanded and I obeyed. I had practiced meditating with Kaede, so the order did not confuse me in any way. The first time I had been commanded to do so, I thought that Kaede had wanted me to sleep. I gave a small grin at the thought but quickly wiped it away.

Before I knew it, Sesshoumaru was commanding me around again, telling me how to control my miko energy and giving very detailed explanations. I was still kind of surprised at how much he was talking, though. He had never talked so much before.

I noticed him glance at the clock and he sighed.

"That's all for today. You can go" he sighed and I nodded, beginning to walk out of the dojo. He cleared his throat and I looked back at him. "...about earlier today..."

'Oh no... here comes the snarling and growling... hopefully he'll make my death short...'

"Thank you."

"Please, if you have to kill me make it- Thank you?" I repeated. He looked at me with his gold eyes and I gave a nervous laugh. "Ehem.. I mean, you're welco-" He began coughing again and I sighed, walking back over to the cupboard and pulling out the medicine. I had just taken my first step towards him when the was a loud "Poof!" and smoke surrounded us. I groaned and placed the medicine back on the shelf, shutting the cupboard doors and walking over to the kid that was now lying on his back as he blinked stupidly at the ceiling. The position he was in made it look like he was making a snow angel in the wooden floor, his hair spread out beneath him. He noticed me and sat up, eyes lighting up with excitement.

"Onee-chan!!!" he chirped, jumping to his feet and racing over to me and tackling me in a hug. Now that surprised the crap out of me. "You didn't leave!"

"I was about to, actually..."

He pulled away, staring up at me with shock in his eyes. "You're going to leave me here in this big, scary house...?" he whimpered and I sweat-dropped.

"Do you want me to stay here with you...?" I asked hesitantly and he shook his head. "So you want me to leave..." He shook his head again. I was so confused.

"Take me with you! I want to go with onee-chan!"

"U-ummm... o...okay... Sure..." I began to leave and he followed me, looking at me with glee. 'This _cannot_ be happening...' I had just gotten onto the street outside of his house when he decided that he didn't like following me and ran to catch up, grabbing my hand. I looked down at him and he looked up at me, blinking in apprehension. He was nervous about my reaction... I gave his hand a comforting squeeze and his eyes lit up with joy. He laughed, showing his abnormally long canines in the process. We reached my house and I saw Himeno with the rest of her gang standing in front of my house. I took a nervous step back and Sesshoumaru noticed. He stared at all of them with suspicion. Hayate's eyes widened when he saw Sesshoumaru, but his surprise quickly turned into a glare. Sesshoumaru's eyes also widened and his grip on my hand tightened as he whimpered in fear.

"The demon..." Hayate growled and the older people around her also widened their eyes at Sesshoumaru. The tanned one... Kei? Yeah, Kei, nodded in agreement. Hayate took a step forward, hatred marring his features, and Sesshoumaru gripped my hand harder. He was terrified. He recognized the people, but at this age he couldn't do anything to protect himself. I gently touched his head and he looked up at me. I kneeled beside him and continued to gaze at me.

"When I say 'innocent' I want you to run back home, okay?" I whispered softly, so that he was the only one that could hear me, or so I thought.

"But onee-chan..." he whimpered.

"I'll be fine, Sesshoumaru. Once you turn back into an adult what you decide to do is up to you, but while you're still a child, run, okay?"

"B-but I don't want to be alone anymore...!" he whined, beginning to cry. I gave a reassuring smile.

"I'll be fine! You know how to get here, right?" I asked and he nodded. "Then whenever you're a child and I'm not around, you can always come here. I'll be here waiting for you." I gently poked his nose and he gave a small laugh as he rubbed the area I poked. "Got that?" He nodded. "Now when I say 'innocent', you're going to run as fast as you can back to your home, okay?" I asked again and he nodded. This time a look of determination and worry was in his eyes. "Don't worry, I'll always protect you..." I stood up and gently nudged him behind me. Facing Hayate and the others, I let my miko energy leak out. I made sure that they could feel it.

"About time you showed who you really are" Hayate grumbled.

"I'm a miko, and that's all I'll ever be!" I hissed, trying out what Sesshoumaru made me perfect today. I focused my ki into the palm of my hand and I felt a swirling mass of my ki forming.

"Takako..." he growled and I felt my anger rising when I realised that he was talking about the same Takako that had turned Sesshoumaru into a child.

"I am not Takako..." I snarled.

"Who else would side with a demon?"

"This demon is _innocent_." I smirked when Sesshoumaru burst off in the direction of his home. The waiter, Go, went to chase after him but I shot the ball of energy at him, stopping him midway. I burst of wind flew towards me and I let it hit me. I was used to Kagura and her stupid wind attacks.

"Hayate! Stop!" Himeno shouted. The little kid that was named Shin began to cry. "Hajime, Mannen, take care of Shin, I have to stop this!" The two other kids nodded and went over to comfort Shin. She ran over to Hayate and tugged on his arm, trying tog et him to stop. I knew it was going to take much more than that to stop him. I had also figured out that Fenrir was once a girl named Takako. I must have looked similar to her... He wasn't about to let the person he thought was Fenrir out of his grasp.

"Let him do what he wants, Himeno!" I shouted and she looked at me. I stared at Hayate, no feeling in my eyes. "Let him kill me..."

"Then what will happen to your youkai friend?" the white-haired man asked and I glanced at him.

"He has been alone for at least five hundred years... he can survive alone a little longer."

"But you promised that you would be here waiting for him didn't you?"

"What are you talking about, Sasame?" the white-haired kid, Mannen, asked.

"When she kneeled beside him, she was talking about how she would be here for him, waiting for him whenever he was lonely. Protect h-"

"Shut your mouth before I purify it off of your face" I threatened. He gave a small smile but it slowly disappeared when Hayate shot another gust of wind at me. I let it hit me and I flew back into the gate, the force making me cough blood. I collapsed to the ground.

"Hayate! Stop!" Himeno pleaded again. He released another gust of wind but this time it hit a sword and it disappeared.

"Your battle is with me. Do not harm a human who has nothing to do with this" Sesshoumaru's cold voice growled as he lowered his katana. Hayate glared, as did Kei and Go. Sesshoumaru turned around and gave a small smirk as he looked at me. "Baka..." he whispered. "I am not so weak as to need your protection forever." He turned back around and I felt a few tears of pain dripping down my cheeks. "But... Thank you again..." I saw him give me a quick glance. "...Onee-chan." I felt my eyes widen in surprise, and then I gave a small laugh. He smiled but it quickly disappeared when he met Hayate's gaze.

"Hayate... please stop..." Himeno whispered and Hayate glanced at her, his anger slowly disappearing.

"...fine..." he mumbled, then vanished in a gust of wind. I looked at Himeno and she sighed in defeat, scratching the back of her head as she walked over to me.

"I never did understand him..." she laughed nervously, trying to get rid of some of the tension between us. Sesshoumaru helped me up and I looked at her.

"I don't blame you" I stated calmly. "I don't blame Hayate, either. It's only natural to fight me..." I gave a bitter smile. "Everyone tends to attack me in the end anyways so I'm used to it." I saw Sasame looking at me with curiosity in his eyes but I dismissed it, ignored it. "I'll see you tomorrow, then, Himeno."

"But I came to see how you were doing from yester-"

"I'm fine!" I hissed. She stepped back in shock. "I'm fine..." I walked past the other people, glancing at the now calmed down Shin. "Are you okay?" I asked and he looked up at me in awe before giving a small nod. Smiling, I ruffled his hair before wincing and holding my ribs.

"Are you okay, miss?" he asked me and I weakly smiled.

"Hai. I'm fine." With that, I opened the door to my house and Sesshoumaru walked in with me, coughing the moment he shut the door. I leaned against it, staring at the ceiling, and slid down it, fighting back tears. There was a cloud of smoke, and the a small body snuggling against me before the smoke could even clear. Letting the small droplets roll down my cheek, I let out a sob and hugged Sesshoumaru closer to me. He was looking up at me worriedly, but decided to stay silent and just hugged me back instead.

"Dammit..." I whispered. "...I promised myself I wouldn't cry... happy thoughts Kagome... this isn't how the others would've wanted you to live..."

----Himeno----

"Himeno?" Shin asked as he caught up with me and I looked down at him.

"Yeah?"

"I like her!"

Hayate snorted from beside me and I glared at him. I noticed Sasame staring blankly at the ground and waved my hand in front of his face. He looked at me and I smiled. He didn't return it.

"What's wrong?" I asked, confused.

"She cries" he mumbled. "The girl cries."

Looking over at Hayate, I could see that he was looking troubled, too. He glanced at me before stopping abruptly.

"You know it too, don't you, Hayate? You just don't want to accept it" Sasame said softly.

"I have no clue what you're talking about" Hayate grumbled, walking again.

"Oh, stop beng so stubborn, Hayate..." Go sighed. "We all know it."

"I'm not being stubborn! I just don't think she's the one!" Hayate retorted.

"You know she is" Kei commented.

"Is not."

"Is too" Mannen chimed in.

"Is not."

"Is too!"

Confused and frustrated, I covered my face with my hands and groaned.

To Be Continued...

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Another chapter done and I am quite proud of it! Two chapters and a oneshot in one day! I'm on a roll!!!!!


	7. Chapter 7

Just Trying to Forget the Pain

Chapter 7

"Talking"

'Thoughts'

----------Kagome----------

Sighing, I was about to doodle in my notebook again when the PA system turned on. Since the speaker was right above me, I couldn't help but wince at the crackling noise and the booming voice that began to speak.

"Is Higurashi, Kagome there?"

"Yes she is."

"Please" Flinch "Send her down to the office with all of her supplies. Someone has come to pick her up from school and take her home."

"Okay, she'l be down in a bit."

"Thank" Flinch "You."

I quickly gathered my supplies, ignoring the envious loks of all of my classmates, and got out of the room as quickly as I could. It was scary in there now for some reason. It was scary everywhere, actually. I felt like I was always being watched, being spied on, and it scared me. As I walked down the empty hallway, I felt a gust of wind and I spun around to see Hayate and the others Leafe Knights standing behind me.

"What do you want?" I asked, getting scared. 'I should be used to this by now! I'm always being cornered by things in the Feudal Era...'

"We just want to ask you some questions, Miss" Hajime informed innocently and I took a step back.

"What are you going to ask me about...?"

"The jewel... do you know what it is...?" Sasame gently asked and I stepped back.

"I have no clue what you're talking about."

"The Shikon Jewel in the legends. Have you ever heard of it?" Kei questioned and memories began to flow through my mind. Shippo's smiling face flashed before my eyes, and moments later I relived his death. I saw Inuyasha demanding the jewel, Sango dying in the last battle, Kohaku beside her... I shook my head, tembling now.

"I have no idea what you're talking about..." I repeated, shaking my head.

"You do know what we're talking about, you're reaction tells us everything."

"I don't know what you're talking about! Just leave me alone!" I shouted, stepping back. Tears began to build and I felt the pressure behind my eyes.

"Please, Kagome... They're very simple questions, really!"

"I said just leave me alone!!!" Why wasn't anyone coming out? Had no one heard me screaming? What was going on? Hayate began to open his mouth to speak when I felt something gently nudge me behind it. I saw silver hair and recognized it as Sesshoumaru.

"Did you not hear her, Knights? Or is your job to hurt humans now instead of protect them from Fenrir and the demon larva?" he growled and I saw Hayate falter at that.

"We just wanted to ask her something about..." Sasame tried to reason but a glare from Sesshoumaru quickly made him trail off. I saw Sasame disappear and noticed that the others left soon after. Sesshoumaru looked at me, his cold facade loosening up a bit as he did so, and I felt him turning me around and leading me out of the school building.

"We'll skip training today" he mumbled and I shook my head, the pressure behind my eyes finally disappearing.

"I want to train until I can kick Hayate's ass and show him just how much he hurt me..." I ground out, fists clenching. Sesshoumaru looked at me with amusement on his face and he gave in.

"Then if you're that determined, we'll train."

I nodded and he led me to his home and into the dojo, where we began our lessons for the day. Surprisingly, he was a very good teacher, and despite the fits of laughter that threatened to bubble up every time he turned into a child, he was still a very strict teacher. Even the kid Sesshoumaru knew how to make you feel weak and stupid. I suppose that's a good thing if I was going to learn from him... but the first time he told me to shut up and stand up when he was a kid really surprised me. When he picked up the sword and had me eating floor in under ten seconds when he was in that form made me even more surprised. I eventually shrugged it off, knowing that it would happen many more times, and continued training until it was late into the night and I had to go home.

After putting all of the items we used for the day away, Sesshoumaru volunteered to walk me home and I agreed, not exactly feeling safe walking home at night. As he walked beside me, I realised that he really did think of me more as a sister now-mainly because of his younger counterpart- and that I began to think of him as more of a brother than a teacher. That's when he began coughing. That's when I also began to realise that something was wrong. There was no wind, and there wasn't any noise at all other than my breathing and Sesshoumaru's coughing.

"Run, Kagome..." he panted and I glanced at him. The look he gave me made me obey immediately and I went racing down the street, locking myself in my home. I heard a scream of pain soon after and I squeezed my eyes shut and covered my ears. I didn't want to listen... I didn't want to hear...

There was suddenly panting outside of my door and I heard sobbing.

"Onee-chan!!!!" Sesshoumaru's childish voice sobbed. "ONEE-CHAN!!!!"

He began pounding on the door and I quickly opened it. He tackled me in a hug and I felt a sticky liquid soaking through my clothing. Looking down at Sesshoumaru I saw that there was a large gash on his left arm and leg and I saw tons of demon larva coming towards my house. Healing his wounds, I then stepped out of the house.

"Stay here, Sesshoumaru" I whispered and he just kept crying, shaking his head as he wiped his tears away with his arm.

"I-hic-I don't want to be alo-hic-ne"

"It's fine. I'll be okay" I reassured, hoping that he didn't remember what happened last time, and raced out into the center of my yard. I calmed my nerves as much as I could when I saw the demon larva and began to purify them as I dodged and shielded myself with a barrier. I heard Sesshoumaru scream and I looked at him, swearing under my breath as I through a barrier around him just in time to deflect an attack. There was a sudden force against my body and I was thrown into the wall beside the gates as the demon larva continued to attack the barrier. The force of it's attacks made it so I couldn't concentrate on the attacks coming towards me, so I couldn't collect enough energy to purify them. Growing tired, I felt my barrier flickering away and I grunted as I stood up and tackled Sesshoumaru to the ground as my barrier shattered, moving him out of the way of the attack. I saw Sesshoumaru's eyes widen in horror and I looked behind me to see a demon larva reaching out for me. I narrowed my eyes in pain when I summoned another barrier.

Struggling to my feet, I let my skinned arms hang by my side, the blood dripping down them and splattering on the brick pathway. Sesshoumaru's cries became louder and I heard him begging me to stop. I looked back at him and gave a weak smile, but my expression turned into a glare as I faced the demon larva again. I panted as I released more ki, just enough to make the demon's die as they hit the barrier, but couldn't keep it for very long before it shattered again and a tentacle wrapped around my neck. It was stealing my ki from me and I coughed as more tentacles wrapped around me, draining me faster. I took this chance of close contact and released the last of my ki, slowly disintegrating them. My breathing grew weak but I continued to let my ki flow away from me. I felt Sesshoumaru yanking on the tentacles but he yelped and hopped back when the purifying powers burned him, too.

"Stop it!!!" he sobbed and I looked down at him weakly.

'Dammit... where are they when I need them...?' I thought as I slowly shut my eyes. There was a small bright light and I reached for it... it was so warm... but why was it running away...? Lunging, I finally caught it in my hand and I smirked. Opening my hand I saw the Shikon. 'What the...?' Power suddenly surged through me again and snapped my eyes open, purifying the demon larva immediately. Ignoring the pain in my arms, I began to purify demons with renewed vigor. An icicle suddenly snapped off a tentacle that was reaching for me from behind and I turned around to see Mannen. Looking aroundme, I saw that the others were also protecting me as I did my work of purifying the demon larva. Himeno was also destroying them with a large fire axe.

I glanced over at Sesshoumaru and saw him running away from a tentacle. I knew that if he had a sword he would be fine, but he didn't have a sword. I raced over to him and picked him up, dodging an attack. I realised that that was all I could do now that I was holding a youkai in my arms. I couldn't risk purifying Sesshoumaru. Continuing to dodge, I began to feel his weight in my pain-wracked arms. Setting him down to rest for a moment. A claw reached out for him from behind but I shoved him out of the way and it grabbed my instead.

"Onee-chan!!!!" he shouted and the claw was separated from the body, making it disappear. I was dropping and I was too weak to stop my fall. I fell into someone's arms and I looked up to see Sasame. He set me down and went to help Himeno again. When the battle was finally over a while later I saw them all looking at me worriedly.

----Sasame----

"You're bleeding..." I commented when the fight was over, but she ignored me and was looking the small youkai over instead of checking her own wounds. She was covered in scrapes, cuts and bruises but she cared more about the child instead of herself... there was no way she could've been Fenrir.

"Are you okay, Kagome...?" Himeno asked and Kagome looked at her, giving a small nod.

"Hai. I'm fine..."

"How stupid are you?!" Hayate exclaimed and Kagome glared at him.

"What are you talking about?" she hissed.

"Taking on all those demon larva by yourself! You could have died!"

"I purify mass amounts of youkai for a living, Hayate, I would've been fine!"

"Not necessarily! Based on how much energy you used, if you were a Leafe Knight you would have died!" Hayate commented.

"But I'm not a Leafe Knight!!" she snarled.

"Does it really matter?! If you can destroy demon larva then you shouldn't have to use that much energy!"

"It's not my fault you arrived so late!" she growled, getting to her feet.

"You could've locked yourself in the house to stay strong for a longer period of time!"

"I'm not a coward! I don't run away!"

"Oh, so you _die_ instead!"

"What I do with my life is none of your business!"

I sighed, deciding that this argument was getting a little too out of hand. I cleared my throat right in the center of Hayate's next argument. They both looked at me and I glanced at the just calming down child.

"How is he?" I asked and Kagome gave me a quick glance of distrust before answering.

"He's fine" she answered curtly. Looking at Hayate again, she glared. "Get off of my property" she commanded and Hayate returned the look.

"Why should I?"

"Get off my of my property!" she snarled and he stepped back. Everyone did. The noise she made was so animalistic, so similar to that of a snarling wolf, that it shocked even Hayate. He turned around and began to walk away. Everyone looked back at him and one by one began to follow him. In the end only I remained. I began to turn around when I heard a heavy 'thud'.

"ONEE-CHAN!!!!" the kid shouted and I spun around to see her on her knees, dully staring at the ground.

"Sessh... Sesshoumaru..." she whispered as she collapsed.

To Be Continued...


	8. Chapter 8

Just Trying to Forget the Pain

Chapter 8

Letting all of you guys know right now, this chapter is going to be a bit longer than the others. :P Enjoy!

"Talking"

'Thoughts'

-----Sesshoumaru (kid)-----

"Onee-chan!!!" I exclaimed, kneeling beside her and shaking her. "Onee-chan!!!!!!" The stench of her blood in the air bagen to make me lose control and I whimpered as I pathetically tried to hold my demon half back. "Onee-chan...!" Why wasn't she getting up? Then again, she had been fighting all night, and the sun was beginning to show itself from the eastern horizon.

I was suddenly covered in shadows and I looked up to see the man I recognized as Sasame. Still fearing him from what he had tried to do to me long ago, I quickly scooped Kagome into my arms, not wanting to let him get her.

"Stay away!" I warned but he knelt down in front of me. So much like how Kagome knelt down in front of me when I was scared... and I was beyond scared now. "Stay away...!" I whimpered as he began to reach out and I flinched when I felt his hand brush my forehead.

"Sesshoumaru... that is your name, right?" he asked. His voice was amazingly soothing and I felt myself relaxing as I nodded. Then, he glanced down at Kagome and I saw him give a small grimace. He began to reach for her and I gave him a warning growl. He looked up at me and I bared my fangs, clearly stating for him to back off. I wasn't very relaxed anymore. The moment he reached for Kagome was when all the relaxation washed off of me and was replaced with alarm and a sudden urge to protect.

"Don't touch her" I growled and he gave a light chuckle, one that made me begin to snarl. How could he be laughing at a time like this?

"I only wanted to help her. After I'm done, you can do whatever you want to keep me away, but all I want to do now is get her to her room and bandage these wounds."

I looked him over, sizing him up, and decided that he would be fine. For now. Besides, if he's dressed in white he can't be that bad... right...? I gave a tiny nod and he began to reach for Kagome again. I fought back the urge to snap at his hand and loosened my hold on her. As he took her out of my grasp, I began to whimper at the sudden loss of comfort. Sasame looked down at me and I quickly ran to the house, opening the door for him so he could get through. When I turned around, the scenery gave me an impression of a sorrowful picture of a couple returning from a battle to the death.

The red sun shined its rays, bathing everything in a scarlet light as the shadows that were cast were long and stretched. Many things were ruined, the only thing remaining fairly intact was the brick pathway that Sasame walked down now. Kagome's limp body was in his arms, her calm face giving the impression that she had died long ago. Her dark clothing, bloody body and dark hair greatly contrasted Sasame's pure white and soft lavander; a picture of light and dark. But that wasn't what bothered me. The fact that they looked so _perfect_ together made my nerves go crazy. I liked this man, but not enough to have him thinking of Kagome as anything more than a friend.

After Sasame had entered the home, I gently shut the door behind him and led him to her room. He set her down on the bed and sat down as I went to grab the necessary supplies. I wanted to get this over with. I wasn't comfortable with him in Kagome's room alone with her. Something just didn't seem right about the thought.

Walking back into the room, I saw him standing up now, looking curiously at a picture frame that was pushed flat against the top of the desk with the picture facing downwards. He began to reach for it when I let out a ferocious snarl and he whirled around to face me. I was glad I came when I did. I had seen what the picture was, I was the one that had placed it in her room. If Sasame saw it, only more questions would fill his mind and I didn't need that from him. I was pretty sure that Kagome felt the same.

I shoved the supplies into his arm, showing from my actions that if he wanted to stay then he shouldn't touch anything other than what I gave him permission to touch. Which was nothing other than Kagome's injuries and the supplies I gave him.

I gracefull hopped onto Kagome's desk and sat down, watching his every move with my eyes. I glanced out the window and saw some of the other Knights waiting for him in a tree. They were also watching him, making sure that I wouldn't do anything to harm him.

He picked up a cloth and began to clean Kagome's wounds, and once he was done, picked up a gauze wrap and gently but confidently wrapped up her arms. The look of complete trust on his face when he glanced at me confused me. Did he trust me not to hurt him or did he trust his friends outside to help him if I made any suspicious movement towards him?

"So, Sesshoumaru," he began as he finished wrapping part of her arm and began to wrap the other half and her knuckles, "how old are you?"

I hesitated before finally saying "...old..."

"That's not very helpful..." he commented and I scowled.

"I'm not going to tell _you_" I growled and he gave a small chuckle again.

"I suppose not. Secrets like the ages of youkai are best kept silent, I guess. If you don't mind me asking, why didn't you let me see the picture on her desk?"

"It's something that I think Kagome doesn't want to see, even more so, you to see, so I'll hide it from you."

"Why won't she let us ask her questions about her past?" he inquired and I scowled. This conversation was beginning to make its way into dangerous territory.

"Her past was painful, and it would be best if it remained untold until she is ready to speak. She will let you know everything that has happened when she deems you worthy enough of knowing" I replied coldly. Sasame got the idea and dropped the subject. I saw him giving Kagome's body worried look and watched as he reached for her shirt collar. He looked at me when I gave a loud snarl. "Get back to work, human" I hissed and he glanced at her collarbone one last time before finishing up her left arm and starting on her right.

-----Sasame-----

Working on her right arm, I couldn't help but take a few glances at her collarbone. There was a line of darkened skin, and I couldn't tell what it was. It looked like a bruise, but it also could have been a scar.

Looking at the child when I was done, I saw that he had fallen asleep and was in a painful looking position on the desk. I gave a soft smile and picked him up, setting him on the bed beside Kagome. Feeling her warmth, he snuggled in a little closer. He unfurled his tail and wrapped it around Kagome in an unconcious, but feeble attempt to protect her from the dangers in the world. I was about to walk out of the room when Mannen quietly appeared in front of me.

"Why are you leaving? Check the picture!" he whispered and I looked down at him.

"I'm not going to. You can, but I'm letting you know now that if the child wakes up he will not hesitate to kill you."

Mannen scoffed at the thought and walked over to the desk, reaching for the picture. I sighed and shook my head. His curiosity was destroying all rational thought going through his brain. He had just touched it and began to slowly lift it when a furious snarl was heard from the bed. How did I know that this was going to happen...?

"Set the picture down, Mannen" I commanded and he glared at me, then at Sesshoumaru. He obeyed and gently placed the photo down, stepping away from it. Sesshoumaru's weary eyes followed every single one of his movements and his growl died down when the photo frame was out of reach. Mannen scowled and 'hmph'd as he vanished. Sesshoumaru relaxed and slowly shut his eyes, knowing that I was still there.

"...why... not me?" I asked softly and he cracked an eye open.

"You helped her..." he answered simply and shut it, curling up against Kagome once again. I couldn't help but give a goofy grin. I was gaining the kid's trust. That was always a good sign. I was about to vanish from the house when the kid stopped me with the word 'Human'. Looking at him, I saw him with his eyes still shut and pressed against Kagome.

"Yes?" I asked.

"...Why did you try to kill me before? I don't sense any malice in your aura..."

"...back then I was still foolish. I've seen your actions and I now know that you wouldn't harm any of us unless you were protecting something." He gave a small grunt, glancing at the picture as he opened his eyes, then at me.

"...go ahead... check it..." he mumbled. "I don't care anymore..."

The movement of his shifting body told me that our conversation was over and I went over to the desk, lifting the photo and looking it over. My eyes widened and I set the picture down. It was a picture of Kagome with the people described in the legend of the Shikon no Tama... and around her neck was...

----Kagome----

My eyes shot open and I looked at the clock. "I'M LATE!!!!" I exclaimed as I hopped to my feet immediately wincing when my arms smacked the wall on accident. "Ow...!" I whispered and felt something tugging on my shirt. I looked behind me and saw Sesshoumaru, still in his kid fom, tugging on it as he tried to rub the sleep from his eyes.

"I have to get to school. Sesshoumaru, I'll be back home when its over, okay?"

He scowled to show that it wasn't okay and I laughed, ruffling his hair. I quickly changed and was about to grab my backpack when it vanished. I looked around and saw Sesshoumaru holding it in his tiny, clawed hands. He yawned, showing his small, pointy canine teeth, and blinked as he then looked up at me.

"Onee-chan's arms are hurt so this Sesshoumaru is going to carry her sool bag for her" he stated.

"School, Sesshoumaru, not sool" I corrected as I walked out of the house, deciding to let him carry it for now. He ran to catch up and stumbled before regaining his balance again.

"S... Skewl..." he tried to pronounce. He looked at me, blinking again. I could tell he was wondering if he pronounced it right this time.

"School" I said slowly.

"School" he repeated and I nodded.

He smiled and we walked to school in silence the rest of the way. When I got there, I was relieved to see that the gates hadn't closed yet and turned around right in front of the gates.

"I can't bring you into class Sesshoumaru, I'm really sorry, I would if I could..." I mumbled and he looked at me, shocked.

"Is onee-chan leaving me...?" he whimpered and I shook my head.

"Iie. I'll be inside the building looking for you every single moment of the day."

"But I can't be with onee-chan then!" he whined and I saw lots of the girls staring at me, giggling when they noticed Sesshoumaru. The bell began to ring and I gasped when I realised that I hadn't brought anything for the history project I had to present today. Looking at Sesshoumaru, a grin made its way onto my lips when I saw that he was in a miniature version of his old hakamas and kimono.

"Actually... I just might be able to make it work..." Grabbing his hand, I led him to my first hour class and sat down. He stood beside me, looking around the room in distaste.

"Onee-chan wanted to leave me alone for this?" he grumbled, scowling, and I gave a small laugh.

"I-Iie... it is required for me to come here very day so-"

"They make you come here?" he interrupted and I nodded just as the teacher came in and the class went quiet. "I don't like the people that try to keep onee-chan away from me, then. They're trying to lock onee-chan in a room that looks like an illuminated prison cell..." he huffed, crossing his arms and glaring at the wall. I gave a nervous laugh as everyone in the room turned their heads to look at him, including the teacher.

"Higurashi..." he ground out.

"Eh heh... I can explain..." I laughed and he gave me a look that said 'you better explain...' "I'm planning on using his help for my history project, but because he has no way of getting here other than by walking with me to school, I have to bring him to all of my classes..." The teacher sighed and shook his head, deciding that it would be a waste of time to try to get Sesshoumaru out of the school. I sighed with relief and I relaxed in my seat. I noticed Sesshoumaru glaring at the back of Himeno's head and I sweat-dropped. Himeno must've noticed too because she gave a small whimper as she sunk in her desk.

About halfway into the class period Sesshoumaru whimpered and plopped to the ground. His legs were tired. I meant to just glance down at him but the look in his eyes captured my gaze. Sighing once again, this time in defeat, I motioned him over and he stood up, walking over. I set him down on my lap, his side facing the teacher as his other side pressed against my body and my eyes widened when he plopped against me with a 'humph', pouting and glaring out the window. His tail twitched with restlessness. When the class ended I looked down at him and gave a soft smile, giving him a gentle hug when I saw that he was asleep.

The morning classes finally ended and I saw some of the girls walking over to me as many more burst through the door right when I got my lunch out. They crowded around me and I felt Sesshoumaru shifting into a more comfortable position. He was still asleep so I quickly quieted them all.

"It's lunch time, Kagome, shouldn't you wake him up?" one asked and I looked down at Sesshoumaru. I had just finished unwrapping my lunch and his nose twitched at the smell. He drowsilly opened one eye and noticed all of the girls around us. He opened his eyes all the way and yawned, giving a small squeak as he did so.

"Do you want something to eat, Sesshoumaru?" I asked and he looked at me before nodding.

"Kawaii!!!!" some of the girls squealed while others giggled. Picking up the pair of chopsticks I packed, I watched him stare at the food in hunger. I gave him the chopsticks and he looked at them in confusion. Looking back at me I took them back out of his hands and placed them in my own.

"Which one?" I asked and he hesitated before pointing at the meat. Duh. I picked it up and saw him gazing at the chopsticks in awe. He opened his mouth and I laughed as I placed the piece of meat in it. His eyes lit up the moment he began to chew and he looked at the meat with a new look of excitement and amazement. When he finished off all of the meat he gazed up at me with a look of pure bliss. I finished off the rest of the food and one of the other girls that was watching us took it and threw it away for me. I answered a few of the questions and sighed with relief when the bell rang, signaling that class would start soon.

Sesshoumaru was once again asleep in my lap and I ripped out a sheet of paper, writing a note on it, before giving it to Himeno. She took it and read it before looking back at me, confused. She nodded though, and was out of the classroom in a split second at the next break we had. When my last class, History, started, I glanced outside to see the Leafe Knights looking up at me.

"Higurashi, Kagome" the teacher announced "Reciting..." he looked up at me, confused. "You never gave me a story..."

"The Legend of the Shikon no Tama" I stated confidently, hiding the pain that I felt as a knife stabbed my heart at the thought of recalling the tale. Sesshoumaru's eyes snapped open when I said those words and he looked at me, shocked and worried.

"That's a very hard and long tale to tell, Kagome, are you sure you want to do it?" I nodded. "Very well then. Let's hear this legend of yours." Taking a deep breath, I felt Sesshoumaru get off of me and I walked to the front of the room, leading him the entire way. I set him on a desk and he looked at me, confused. "Why don't you tell us what you... _who_ you have..." the teacher corrected and I looked at Sesshoumaru.

"I actually need to change..." I mumbled and he looked at me skeptically before nodding and waving me off. I ran to the bathroom and quickly changed into my miko garb, pulling my hair back, before appearing in the classroom again.

"_Now_ tell us who you have... and what you're dressed in..."

"This is my little brother, dressed as the Lord of the Western lands that is mentioned in the legend, and this is a replica of the outfit the mikos wore at that time." 'Yeah... replica...'

"Okay. Very well then, you may begin." At those words, I began to retell the tale of my life in the feudal era. I went farther than retell the tale, actually, I brought the class there with my words, thrusting them into my journey. Sesshoumaru occasionally commented, adding things that I had missed, and I appreciated that. The parts he told were the times that I felt too painful to tell myself. In the end, at the final battle, I had Sesshoumaru tell the rest, he had been there afterall, and as the story came to a close, I saw that I had made some of the females in the class cry. One of which was Himeno. After changing and going back to my seat, I looked out the window and saw Sasame standing there, staring at me, and Hayate looking just about ready to pull his hair out as Goh teased him.

-----Sasame-----

I saw her as she walked out of the school, Sesshoumaru behind her, and she stopped right in front of us. She looked Hayate in the eye, but quickly dropped her gaze.

"Are you happy now, Hayate? I told you all I know about the Shikon."

"Which is just as much as everyone else does..." he mumbled and she nodded. She walked past him but Sesshoumaru just stayed where he was, looking at me.

He mumbled something so softly that only I could here, and what he said made me sweatdrop.

"Tell anyone about what you saw in the picture before she's ready and I'll personally hunt you down and kill you."

'That's a comforting thought...'

To Be Continued...


	9. Chapter 9

Just Trying to Forget the Pain

Chapter 9

"Talking

'Thoughts'

-----Sesshoumaru (Kid)-----

"Onee-chan!" I panted, trying to keep up with Kagome. She was making a gruelling pace, much faster than earlier today. "Onee-chan!" Stopping abruptly and waiting for me to catch up, she looked inside of a nearby shop window, nostalgia dulling her eyes. Glancing inside of the shop, I saw a figurine of a white-haired hanyou with a red robe pinned to a tree, and arrow through his heart. She lifted her hand and placed it against the window, moving her gaze from the figurine, to her bandaged hand, to her reflection in the window and repeated the process over and over again.

"...Sesshoumaru...?" she whispered, finally staring at me, and I looked at her.

"Hm?"

"...Why can't I forget...?"

"...because your heart doesn't want to" I replied and she slowly nodded, placing a wrapped hand above her heart.

"...I guess it doesn't... it hurts..."

"We should go home so you can rest, onee-chan" I said softly, gently taking her hand. She nodded and we walked home again, this time not at such a fast pace. We went into a familiar alley and made our way through the darkness, ignoring the coldness that surrounded us, along with the strange feeling of being watched. We made it out of the alley safely and quickly walked over to her house. She opened the gates and stepped inside when there was suddenly a strong presence behind her. Turning around, I saw Sasame there and gave him a warning growl. Kagome stood, staring at the now closed gate. She didn't want to look at him...

"What do you want, Sasame?" she asked quietly, knowing he could hear her.

"...I was just wondering if you'd be willing to meet me at the park later. I have a few questions that have been tugging at my mind for a while. Don't worry, there won't be anyone else there" he replied.

"...sure. I'll set my things down and I'll meet you there in about half an hour..."

'Not a good idea, Kagome...' I growled in my head and narrowed my eyes. I could see Sasame looking kind of uncomfortable and awkward as he shifted. He certainly wasn't used to being glared at by a kid, that was for sure. He shrugged and vanished, along with his aura.

"Please tell me you're not going to see him, onee-chan" I whimpered and Kagome shook her head.

"I'm going to talk to him. He helped us yesterday, Sesshoumaru. He bandaged my inuries when everyone else had already left. I need to repay him somehow."

"...just make sure that nobody else is around to hear your story."

"I don't _want_ anyone around other than him. He wouldn't lie to me, he doesn't seem like the type to lie."

"Maybe not to you, but he seems like the type to give in to the pressure of others to me."

She shook her head. "I trust him enough to tell him, Sesshy, he's nice enough. But when I go, please don't follow me. He might make me lose my temper and I might purify you."

Sighing, I took her pack from her and brought it into the house. I heard the gates shutting behind her as she began to walk to the park and I stared after her, debating whether to follow her or not. Deciding to obey her just this once, I sat on the window sill, staring outside and waiting for her return.

"If you hurt her, Knight of Sound, if you hurt my onee-chan I'll return the pain to you ten fold!!!!" I shouted at the top of my lungs, knowing that if he tried then he could hear me. I looked out the window to see him standing there and watched as he gave a small nod before vanishing again. A small smile formed on my lips and I felt myself beginning to the like the man even more than before.

----Sasame----

"Did you get her to come to the park?" Himeno asked and I nodded. I felt horrible for what I was about to do, but I was the only one that she actually trusted, even if it was just a little bit.

"Yes. She's on her way now."

"Great! Now all we have to do is hide in bushes and watch!"

Feeling a rise in energy, I felt myself getting nervous. The horrible feeling I had worsened even more.

"Go and hide now, she's almost here. Remember, stay as far away as possible while still in hearing range" I stated and I saw them all nod. What was I doing...? I was betraying her, and possibly breaking all the trust she had in me. After I felt that all of their energy had disappeared from the concealing spell, I relaxed a little.

"You wanted to talk to me?" Kagome asked from behind me and I turned around.

A gentle breeze was blowing through her hair as she stood there, watching me. The school uniform waved in the wind and I saw her sad, gray eyes staring into mine. I slowly nodded. For a moment, a stray thought ran through my mind.

'She's beautiful...'

"Hai. I wanted to talk to you" I stated as calmly as I could, despite my raging heart. I couldn't do this. I couldn't do this to her. I shoved that feeling away too and we just stood there, staring at eachother for a long time.

"Why are they just standing there, Goh?"

"Shh! She might hear you, Mannen!"

"Would you like some ice cream?" I offered and her eyes began to twinkle as a grin forced its way onto her lips.

"Ice cream is the only thing you can offer me that I won't decline" she answered and spun around, walking happily to the ice cream vendor a few meters away. She stopped when she reached the halfway mark and looked back at me. "Are you coming or not?" she demanded, "I want my ice cream!"

Glancing back at the bushes, I heard soft laughter and a whimper. The kids wanted some too, apparently. I chuckled and followed her, waving backwards at the children hiding in the bushes. I heard a growl and a small 'thump' as someone was tackled to the ground. Goh probably tackled Mannen.

Finally catching upto Kagome, I looked at her and she returned the gaze.

"What do you want?" I asked and she thought for a while before finally replying.

"Chocolate."

"That's it?" I asked, amazed. The others usually wanted something extremely complex. When Kagome nodded, showing that that was all, I began to realise that Kagome was a person that like the simple things in life. She didn't need anything fancy to keep her happy, the necessities were enough to satisfy her.

"What would you like?" the ice cream man asked.

"One chocolate and one mint" I answered and paid. He handed me the ice cream a little later and I gave one to Kagome before she began to walk off again. I followed her, not knowing what else to do.

"Where are you going?" I wondered out loud and she looked back at me, slowing down.

"Finding somewhere private so no one can hear our conversation" she replied, looking at me as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. I pointed at the small forest in the middle of the park and her eyes lit up, nodding before skipping happily into the trees, licking her ice cream. Jogging after her, I noticed the others beginning to follow us from the corner of my eye. I only hoped that Kagome wouldn't notice. After about a minute or so, she stopped and turned around, continuing to lick the small dome of ice ream at the top of her cone.

"So..." she started.

"Yes?" I began to lick my ice cream.

"What did you want to ask me?"

"About the photo in your room" I stated and her eyes widened, then lit up even more. She smirked behind her ice cream.

"So you saw it" she mused and I nodded. Should I tell her that Sesshoumaru was the one that had allowed me to? Apparently I didn't have to, her next sentence answered it for me. "I thought so. Sesshy seemed to be a little more weary of you after yesterday. What do you want to know about it?"

"Who are they?"

"My friends."

"I figured that much out."

"Old friends. Friends that I had before I moved."

"Had...?" I questioned and she nodded. "Why aren't they your friends anymore?"

"They're gone."

"... what do you mean...?"

She looked at me, her face wearing an emotionless mask.

"They left this world long ago" she stated coldly, and I couldn't help but wonder what she felt under that cold expression she currently held. "They died well."

'Huh...?' "How did they die, then?"

"They fought. They were killed one by one. An honorable death." She left it at that. Apparently she only wanted me to know the basics of her life's history. Apparently her past was a touchy subject.

"Why won't you tell me anything else?"

"You didn't ask me anything else."

"Okay... do you have a brother?"

"Yes."

"How old is he?"

"Not old."

"You're not being very descriptive."

"Your questions leave much room for the imagination. I'm not lying, but I'm not exactly telling you everything either."

"I've noticed..." I heard Hayate grumble, then he hissed when a small slapping noise was heard. Kagome was oblivious to the comment that Hayate had just given her.

"What school does he go to?"

"Elementary."

"..."

"Is that all?"

"Why did you tell us to hear the story you told in history?"

"I thought you might like to hear it."

"Is that really all? There must be another reason."

"You saw the picture in my room and that should be able to answer your question, Knight."

"What are you talking about?"

"What was I wearing around my neck?"

"A bottle."

"What was it filled with?"

"Fragments of some broken item."

Lifting her shirt a little, I saw a large, dark scar on her side. "What does this look like?"

"A scar..." 'What else?' That's when I heard a gasp from the bushes. It had all finally come together in Himeno's mind. Everything had finally fallen into place and it 'clicked'.

"...miko" I sighed and she lowered her shirt.

"Yes?"

"Where is the Shikon no Tama now?"

"Inside of me."

"Can you remove it?"

"You want it?" she asked and I slowly nodded. What was she getting at? She raised her head and looked to the side so her throat was revealed. "Then kill me." My eyes widened.

"Why do I have to kill you to get the jewel?"

"It's in my heart. There is no other way to get it unless you kill me. I'm giving you the choice now. If you desire the jewel that much then kill me."

"..." Choosing to stay silent, I licked my ice cream again, completely ruining the mood that she had set up. "You're ice cream's melting..." I finally commented and she looked at the cone in her hand before licking it. I saw her starting to tremble and I slowly lowered mine, getting worried. A few tears rolled down her cheeks and she dropped to her knees, still trembling.

"You okay...?" I asked and I heard laughter. Not Himeno's though. It was like music to my ears, the moment it reached them.

"You really know how to make me laugh, don't you? I haven't laughed in so long..." she giggled, looking up at me. She laughed more when she saw my expression.

"What? What did I do now?" Laughing harder, she looked at me with an evil glint in her eye. Next thing I know, something _very_ cold smarshed against my face. 'She did _not_ just...' As some dripped into my mouth, I recognized it as chocolate ice cream. Kagome just sat there on the ground, laughing. She then froze and looked at the bushes, right where the others were hiding. I noticed a strong energy coming from there and I grew worried. Did one of the barriers drop...?

Kagome stood up and glared at me. "Liar" she hissed and I took a step back. "Liar! Ooohhh, you are so dead! Stay right there! I need to kill the others first. I'll come back to murder you in a few minutes."

"Why would I-"

"STAY!" she commanded, commanding me as if I were her dog.

'Oooookay... scary lady...' I licked my cone again, deciding to stay just to see what she would do to 'Kill' the others.

To Be Continued...

FANTABULISTIC! MAGNIFICONIST! GREATABULIS! SUPERBABY! TO THE RESCUE!!! SESSHOUMARU IS GOING TO KILL SASAME!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NEVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DON'T LET HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! KAGOME!!!! DON'T HURT HIM EITHER!!!...He's mister hot guy. Your not allowed to hurt mr hottttttt guy.

The penalty would be...ummm...never writing another chapter again!

gasp! INUYASHA SAID IT!!! SHAME ON YOU INUYASHA!!!...though that's true. She does kill off a lot of the ppls...like Kagome in that one other story. Then all this other sad stuff...boohoo...

Keh. Shut up.

NEVER!!! ULIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Inuyasha's being mean and saying that he doesn't like your story because he said he isn't in it!!!

Hey! I never-

NOBODY ASKED YOU!!!

--Your other half

(Inuyasha said it!)


	10. Chapter 10

Just Trying to Forget the Pain

Chapter 10

"Talking"

'Thoughts'

----Kagome----

I stormed over to the bushes, sphere of miko ki in my right hand, and shot it into the bushes. The concentration of the energy turned everything around it to ash and I glared when I saw a barrier, blocking them from my powers. There was something coming at me from behind and I dodged at the last second, turning around to see Sasame. He was in that wierd outfit from before, the ice cream on his face gone.

"Aww, and the ice cream suited you so _well_" I stated sarcastically.

"Ha. Ha. Ha" he mumbled and I smirked.

"I'm going to enjoy hurting you sooo much, Sasame. I wouldn't have before, but the fact that you _decieved_ me, that is enough to make me want to beat the crap out of you."

I dodged another attack and saw an icicle fly past my face. I whirled around and shot down the attacker with a flick of my wrist. The kid went crumpling to the ground and I glared at Hayate.

"Was all of this your idea?" I hissed and he shook his head. "I don't believe you."

He created a sword from his wind and I watched as he came closer, paying close attention to the auras that were slowly surrounding me. Sasame's and Himeno's turned into one and I narrowed my eyes. They had created a plan just in case this happened... They _knew_ that this was going to happen... they predicted my reaction _perfectly_.

They unleashed all of their attackes at once, and knowing that I wouldn't be able to dodge, I created a barrier and blocked them all. I winced as the combined force made me fall to my knees, but I stayed strong and eventually came out unscathed.

"I can't believe I actually _trusted_ you, Sasame" I hissed, lunging at Himeno. I dodged all of the attacks aimed at me with ease and stopped right in front of her. "Release the hold you have on eachother" I commanded, creating a barrier and blocking all advances being made.

"Why should I?" Himeno asked, nervous.

"I don't want to hurt you, Himeno, I can tell from your aura that you held no position in the actual planning out of his betrayal. Let him go."

"How do I know that you won't hurt me?" she asked wearilly and I felt my heart clench in pain.

"I won't do something that has already been done to me" I replied coldly, my face emotionless in order to hide the pain. She slowly nodded and in a flash of light, Sasame and Himeno were once again separate people. I dropped the barrier and tackled Himeno as to the ground just in time. Had I left her there, she would have been burned to a crisp by the large flame that roared past. Rolling to my feet, I stood up and ran away from the area where Himeno was. Hajime and Shin weren't doing anything, they didn't want to hurt me, and I could tell that Sasame was hesitating with every attack he was throwing at me.

'He doesn't want to h-' I yelped when I dodged one of Hayate's advances just a little too slowly. I hopped away, holding my shoulder and squinting in pain. Looking at the blood spilling out of the wound, I moved my hand away from the wound and felt myself getting sick at the sight. It was blood, and this time it was because I was fighting for myself, not for anyone else... I felt the ice cream that I ate fighting to come back out and I covered my mouth as I was hit by one of Sasame's attacks. I flew back and hit a tree. It hurt. A lot. I crumpled to the ground and put up a barrier as I tried to hold in the ice cream.

I bent over and began to heave. Puking, I saw some of my blood mixed in, which only succeeded in making me throw up again. Tears rolled down my cheeks as memories bathed in blood forced their way into my mind, and even though the barrier held me in, I let out a blood-curdling scream. The attacks on my barrier suddenly stopped and I sobbed as I held myself and dry heaved. It was horrible. Hajime came over and knelt beside me, looking at me worriedly. He touched my shoulder and I flinched.

"Don't touch me!" I snarled, shoving him away with my bloodied hand. Seeing the look in his face, the blood smeared on his clothing... I shook my head, and image of Shippo taking his place. "...no..." I whimpered, holding my head and watching the blood drip onto the ground. "Shippo..." I whispered. "Shippo...!"

A crash rang out and I shot to my feet, spinning around. A demon larva towered over me, waving its appendages around. It reached out for me and I dodged it. This... this _thing_ woudl be my stress reliever for now. I needed to _kill _something. I dodged all of its attacks and touched its side, releasing my ki and watching as it squirmed. I growled with pleasure when it writhed in pain, trying to escape its slow, painful death by lashing out at me, I let it hit me, still wanting to watch it die painfully. I felt Himeno preting with Kei and I glared.

"Stay out of this!" I snarled and she froze. The sight of the dying demon calmed my nerves a little and I gave an evil smile, crying from the pain. Memories of the tohers perishing before my eyes... the memories... they were killing me anyways... I had no appetite lately, I didn't eat very much, and pain almost seemed to be a relief now.

As the last bit of demon was turned to ash, I dropped my arm and walked away. I felt them following me but a burst of aura, shooting the closest one down (which just so happened to be Sasame), gave them a very clear warning to leave me alone. I walked back home in silence, the blood flowing freely along with the tears, staining the bandages wrapped around my arms. I glared at them and tore them off, not wanting anything to do with that liar touching me. Ignoring the stares that people gave me made me immune to my surroundings and I ended up in front of the house all to quickly for my liking. I hadn't thought about what to say to Sesshoumaru...

Opening the door with a loud 'creek', I saw Sesshoumaru slamming the door open, racing over to me and skidding to halt right in front of me. He gently grabbed my hand and I let him lead me into the home. He led me to my room and I sat down on the ground so that he could reach the injuries easilly, watching as he cleaned my wounds and rebandaged my arms. I shut my eyes when I felt his small hands wrapping them and felt a few tears dripping down my cheeks. The anger in his aura was overpowering, and I found it slightly comforting. When he was done, I cupped his hands in mine and rested my head on them.

"...I'm so sorry..." I whispered.

---Sesshoumaru (Kid)---

After she whispered her apology, I felt my anger rising even more, and despite how much I'd had loved to kill the Knight of Sound, I had something else to worry about at the moment. Warm liquid dripped onto my hands and I felt her entire body trembling. She sniffed and I knelt in front of her.

"I'm so... sorry..." she whimpered in between sobs.

'How could that Knight have done this to her? After all of those promises he made, and all of those warnings I gave him... did he not take me seriously?'

I hugged her until her trembling died down and I gently set her down on the ground. I looked up and out the window to see Sasame standing in the tree outside her window, staring at her with some look akin to regret in his eyes. His eyes met mine and I glared at him. Looking away from my gaze, he stared at the ground, occasionally glancing at Kagome. I growled and he heard it. Not daring to take any chances with his luck, he disappeared. I sighed and stood up, grabbing a kendo stick that I had brought over and opened a window. I hopped out and gently landed on the ground.

"Come out, come out, wherever you are, oh wonderful Knight of Sound!" I called. I scowled when he didn't show. "Oh, come on! You can't be scared of me, can you? I'm a _kid!_ What's the most I could do?!"

"You're a demon child, to be exact" he stated from behind me and I turned to look at him.

"Ahh, there you are..." I growled, a smirk forming on my lips. "You do remember your promises, correct?"

"Ummm... yeah... I do, actually."

"And yet you still broke them?" I lunged and slashed, which he blocked with his arm. "Shame on you" I grunted. He hopped back, wincing, and I looked at my kendo stick, shocked. I held it up, looking it over.

"What are you doing?" he hissed.

"...its still in one piece..." I mumured, awed. "This must be the best kendo stick I've ever bought..." I gave a sadistic grin at the thought and glanced over at Sasame. He gave a nervous laugh and stepped back.

"Whoa, there... What I did can't have been _that_ ba- okay, maybe it is!" he shouted, dodging my next attack. The already shattered brick pathway shattered more. The kendo stick still didn't break.

"Ohhh, I'm really liking this kendo stick now!" I chuckled, slashing over and over again. He got hit once and grunted. I was about to slash again when I thought that my kendo stick was unusually light. Glancing at it, I saw that it had snapped in half, and that the other half of the kendo stick was on the ground a few feet away. I chucked the remains at him and he barely dodged. I gave a sigh when he stood there, panting and holding his arm.

"That kendo stick did last longer than the others" I muttered, looking at him now. "It lasted about twice as long. I'll have to buy more of that brand from now on."

"How about not and say you did?" he panted. I shook my head.

"Nope! Have to buy some more!" I suddenly lunged at him, sensing that he was off guard, and appeared behind him. He glanced at me, knowing that he couldn't escape. I grabbed his arm. Hard. Making sure to use my claws, and he winced when I broke skin. "Listen you" I snarled. "If you _ever_ do this to my onee-chan again, I won't let you off as easilly. I'll use more than just one kendo stick on you. I might even just bring an actual katana. Go tell your fellow Knights that if they even _think_ about hurting onee-chan one more time, I'll hunt all of you down and give you a painful death. One. By. One. I'm much stronger than Kagome."

He gave a small nod and vanished. Looking up at the window of Kagome's room, I sighed and looked at my tiny clawed hands. I felt fighting inside of me and knew that my older half wanted to come out, he wanted to be free. He wanted to kill.

'Just a little longer...' I begged him, 'I want to make sure my world doesn't fall apart in front of my eyes... again... I want to know what life would have been like if everything hadn't gone wrong...'

I felt the struggling stop and knew that he had hesitantly agreed. He wanted to know too... he wanted to know what it would have been like, how he much he would have changed from who he was now...

-----Sasame-----

I held the punture wound in my arm and walked over to the others. They had waited for me in the park.

"How's she doing?" Goh asked and I gave a sad smile.

"Not good" I replied.

"Hayate... you were too cruel... she would have told us eventually, you didn't have to force it out of her..." Himeno whispered and Hayate glanced at her.

"I know that, but we needed as much information as we could get out of her. The demon larva are attacking in higher number now so we don't ahve enough time to sit and wait. Are you willing to do it again, Sasame?" he questioned and I shook my head, clearly stating 'no'.

"I don't want to _die_ Hayate" I informed and he gave me a confused look. "The youkai child that follows her around, he's dangerous."

Mannen scoffed. "How dangerous can he-" I dropped my arm and lowered the collar of my shirt, showing them all the punctures and the large, dark bruise forming on my collarbone.

"He's lethal. I couldn't dodge. His skills are way out of our league. I'm not wanting to betray them again."

"Why didn't you teleport?" Hajime asked and I looked at him.

"He would have killed me in the split second it takes to do so."

"So the kid's that good?" Hayate asked and I nodded.

"Terrifyingly strong. I thought he broke my collarbone for a few minutes. He shattered the kendo stick like it was nothing. If you want to hurt her some more, be my guest, but he told me to warn you that if she ever gets hurt because of us again, he'll come and us down one by one."

"The kid is pretty threatening..." Goh mumbled and I nodded.

"Injuring her is up to you, I'm _not_ doing it again. We already have enough information to know that she isn't Fenrir, Hayate, what more do you want?"

"...I don't know..."

"...then leave her alone."

"What are you going to do about it, Sasame?" he growled and I glared at him.

"I'll make sure that you don't get a chance to touch her" I replied coldly. "She's been through enough. The Shikon isn't a legend to her, it's her _past_. She's _lived_ it. She's fought the demons and survived, she's fought Naraku and lost all the friend's she once had. She sacraficed her entire future in order to keep history following the same path. Leave her _alone_ Hayate."

"...fine..." he hissed as he spun around. "But that doesn't mean I'm not going to ask her a few questions about what we heard today."

"Just don't die in the process" Kei commented and Hayate stiffened. He grumbled to himself as he kept walking away and I chuckled. Thanks to Kei the tension between had loosened a little. That was a good sign.

To Be Continued...


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyahsa, Pretear, or Where Do I Belong by Anastacia!

(By the way, thank you soo much Kurama'sFoxyMiko for giving me the song!!!!!!!!)

Just Trying to Forget the Pain

Chapter 11

firefox369

------Kagome------

"...Sesshoumaru?" I mumbled softly and I saw him glance over at me.

"Yes, onee-chan?"

"...I think I'm going to stay home today... I'm not up to facing any of them quite yet. Just the thought of any of them makes my blood boil."

He nodded, returning his gaze to outside the window. "Then stay home. I'll watch over you."

"I need to find a job..." I whispered and his eyes shot towards me, alarmed.

"Why?"

"Since you're a kid, I can't exactly let you pay for my bills. I'll pay for them on my own. Stay here while I go out and look for a decent paying job" I stated, standing up and grabbing my purse and house keys. I felt him tug on my shirt and I turned to look at him.

"Don't go anywhere too sketchy, onee-chan. I don't want you to get hurt..."

I smiled and patted his head, reassuring him that I wouldn't go anywhere stupid. My hands turned the doorknob and I stepped outside, gently shutting the door behind me. After going through the gates, I turned around and locked them before going towards town. I had to make sure that no one was following me... that none of the Knights were following me...

I reached out with my miko ki and felt the tendrils slowly make their way through everyone, threading through the crowd and scanning their aura. I felt a familiar one and decided to focus more energy in that person. A string colorful language spread forth from my mouth as I ducked into the nearest building, which just so happened to be a bar/club. That was a good thing because I was almost positive that Sasame's hearing abilities would be overwhelmed by the loud music and horrible karaoke singers on stage.

Shoving my way through the crowd, I turned to see Sasame walking in and looking around for me, a small scowl on his face telling me that his powers were indeed useless in the current atmosphere. Sighing with relief, I relaxed and began to make my way over to the bar, trying to act as if I were here for a reason, which I was, even if it was on accident.

After I was in front of the bartender, I loudly cleared my throat to catch his attention. he looked over at me and a smile spread across his face.

"What can I do for you?" he asked.

"Are there jobs available here?"

He thought for a while before nodding and taking out a form. He handed it to me and motioned to a man on the other side of the room.

"He's who interviews you, and because we're so short-handed he'll most likely be hiring you on the spot without an interview. You have to have amusing talents and be good enough for his tastes, but that shouldn't be a problem for you."

Nodding, I took the sheet from him and struggled over to the man that he had pointed out. The person in front of me was moderately tall and had black hair with gray eyes. He noticed me and cocked to his head the side as if asking me what I wanted.

Hading him the sheet, I pointed at the bartender but before a word could come out of my mouth he grabbed my wrist and led me into a backroom.

"You're hired" he stated.

"W-wha...?"

"You're hired" he repeated and turned around, looking at the assorted clothing. Pulling an outfit from the walls, he handed it too me.

"...no interview or resume or _anything_?"

He shook his head. "We're extremely short on hands and we've just been getting busier and busier. Here's your uniform, you'll be helping Hart at the bar. You're free to start working now if you want to. 3 hours every other day and you're free. No overtime."

Taking it, I looked it over and gave a mental sigh of relief. It was pretty, and wasn't very revealing at all. It only showed about just as much as the school uniform so I was fine with it. He walked out, leaving me to change into it, and I did. After changing, I scanned the area with my powers and felt that Sasame was still here. Scowling, I stepped out of the room and squeaked when I ran into someone. Looking up, I was surprised to see Sasame right in front of me. How had he gotten there so quickly? He was on the opposite side of the bar when I had checked...

"What do you want?" I growled and he just looked at me.

"I thought students weren't supposed to have jobs...?"

"Its not up to schools to decide. I have to pay my bills and I have no way to do it other than to find jobs."

"...How long?" he asked and I glanced at him.

"What do you mean?"

"How long is your shift?"

"...I've got another three hours" I replied softly and he nodded.

"I'll send you to school afterwards."

Anger boiled up inside of me and I glared at him.

"Who do you think you are, commanding me like this? It's my life and I'll live it however I want to! Its not up to you to decide, Sasame!" I snarled and he just stood there, an indifferent look on his face.

"Do you think that I don't know that?" he questioned and I gazed at him, frustration blazing in my eyes.

"Get out of my way so I can start working" I growled and he stepped to the left, letting me pass. I felt his eyes on my back as I went to work, walking over to the bar and looking at Hart.

"Ready to get started?" he inquired and I nodded. He served a few customers as I watched in awe at his tricks and stunts. He noticed me and smiled after he finished pulling off a bottle trick, making it spin like a gun on his pointer finger. "You'll get used to it. Its really not that hard" he informed and I nodded. In every moment of his freetime, he came over to me and helped me learn the simple actions, and by the time he was done with his shift, I had pretty much perfected many of the things he taught me.

"Sorry Kagome, but I've got to take off. Girlfriend's going to kill me if I don't, if you know what I mean. Oh, be careful. Some of the customers can be pretty rude to girls, that's why all the female workers quit."

I nodded, giving a small laugh as I assured him that I would be careful, and waved as he squeezed his way out the door. Turning to the first customer, I smiled.

"What can I get for you, sir?" I asked and the tired man looked at the choices on the wall above my head.

"Bloody Mary" he mumbled and I nodded, picking up what supplies I needed and performing the process of entertainment with ease as I made it for him. He took it with me, his tired gaze turned into an interested one. Taking the drink, he took a sip and grinned. "Thanks, miss."

Smiling, I nodded and turned to the next one. It went on like this for a fairly long time before the trouble started. The first person just held my hands for an uncomfortably long time, but they got bolder and eventually began to grope me. After about the eighth attempt, I was so frustrated that I punched downwards onto the man with my fist, knocking him unconcious. I was proud to say that the attempts lowered for a while afterwards.

"Hey, miss, sing us a song!" a random man hollered and I got nods of ageement from the now filled bar as they all checked me out. The gazes made me feel sick.

"I-I'm really not that much of a singer..." I laughed nervously.

"Nonsense! I'm sure you have a perfectly wonderful voice!"

"I-ie... I'm a terrible singer..."

A familiar aura was suddenly felt and I turned to see Sasame, looking on in amusement.

"Come one, I'm sure you can't be that horrible" he chimed in and I glared.

"...I'll do it only if you get out of the club" I bargained and he turned around.

"Fine, fine" he sighed, walking out. Satisfied, I looked at the stage in horror. What had I gotten myself into...? A man suddenly grabbed my wrist and shoved me onto it. I stood there awkwardly, looking at my boss for help. I didn't get any. He was watching me in amusement too and I whimpered into the mic, recieving a loud roar of laughter.

"This can't be happening..." I groaned and the laughter got louder.

----Sasame----

I smiled to myself as I leaned against the door outside of the club. I could hear her whimpering and complaints from here and I found it very amusing. The sudden soft sound of a guitar met my ears and I walked back inside, a smirk on my face. She never clarified how long I had to stay outside of the club.

_Oh.. Oh.._

The sudden noise was slightly haunting and it was timid. As the music wore on, I felt her becoming more confident.

_Life doesn't promise a bed of roses  
Or white knights  
Fields of emotions I'm trapped in darkness  
Why me  
Save me  
To win this twisted war inside me  
Won't justify the pain  
Life doesn't promise a bed of roses_

Leaning against the wall of the club, I shut my eyes and let my ears do all the work for me. The verse made me tense, knowing exactly what this song was going to be about. Guilt filled me and I calmed myself the best I could as I listened on.

_Lightening strikes the pages keep on turning  
Help me to be strong  
I'm floating in a sea of strange believers  
Where do I belong?_

Still leaning against the wall, I felt her confidence rising and she was singing strongly now, her voice blending into the music perfectly.

_Oh.. Ohh.._

'Why does she think she's so bad at singing? She's the complete opposite...'

_They paint a picture of perfect nowhere blue skies  
Within every lie there's a web of comfort  
For them  
Not me  
To win this twisted war inside me  
Won't justify the pain  
They paint you a picture of perfect nowhere_

I cringed. Okay, so I had betrayed and lied to her in order to please the other's curiosity... I didn't want to do it! I may have done it on purpose but I still didn't want to do it!

_I said now  
Lightening strikes the pages keep on turning  
Help me to be strong  
I'm floating in a sea of strange believers  
Where do I belong?_

'...Where do you belong...?' I repeated in my mind, wondering the same thing.

_Where do we go from here?  
I wish I would disappear  
I'm a lonely soul  
So far from home _

Yeah, yeah, yeah..

Lightening strikes the pages keep on turning  
Help me, help me  
I'm floating in a sea of strange believers  
Where do I.. I said  
Lightening strikes, I said lightening strikes  
Floating in a sea of strange believers  
Where do I belong?

As the song came to an end, I slowly opened my eyes and looked into Kagome's eyes, searching them for something. For what, I didn't know, but from how far I was, I couldn't see her eyes very clearly. She noticed me and even when her eyes locked with mine, I still couldn't see what I was looking for.

I walked up to her at the bar and saw her getting a very large roar of applause. She glanced at me and saw a small glimmer of hope in her eyes but it quickly disappeared and she looked away, walking behind the counter and continuing to serve the already overcrowded bar. It confused me. Why was she smiling? I could see the hurt in her eyes so clearly, and every time she smiled, the hurt deepened. I walked over to her and she started out treating me like any other person until she realised just who she was smiling at. She scowled.

"What do you want?" she grumbled.

"You."

Her eyes widened as there were cat calls and I rolled my eyes.

"I didn't mean it in a sexual way..." I added and she gave me a suspicuous glance. She eventually gave up and threw down her rag.

"Follow me, we'll talk in the backroom" she mumbled. I followed her and as the door shut behind us, I saw her shoulders sag, as if all her life had disappeared from her and she was just an empty shell. Turning around, she had her original composure and I grew slightly worried.

"Are you okay, Kagome?" I questioned and she nodded.

"What did you want to ask me, Sasame?" she whispered and I tried to look into her eyes, searching for that... _something_ again.

"...are you okay?" I repeated and she looked up at me, scowling.

"Do I really look like I am?" she growled. "I trusted you, Sasame. I thought that I had finally found someone to count on other than Sesshoumaru. I thought I could _lean_ on you but you ripped all of those thoughts to shreds. You have no clue how much you did to me... how much of my past you made resurface... I thought that I was finally getting better... healing..."

"I came to apologize."

"It's too late for that."

"It may be too late in your eyes, but in mine, this is just as good of a time as any other."

"That's where we differ then, isn't it, Sasame?"

"No two can be exactly alike, and no one is perfect in any way. We all make mistakes, the pain is just to make us feel worse about what we did."

"And I suppose that's why you always seem so calm and content. You forget the pain."

"No. I could never forget. I learn from my mistakes and force myself to look past the pain."

"What I feel is not anything that I can look past. My enitre life had changed in the span of less than a day and a half. All my friends... my family... taken away... ripped away from me. I can't forget them."

"You can forget them, you just don't want to."

"That may be so, but I enjoy the pain. It gives me something to remind me of where I am now, to make me remember why I don't gather the shards anymore, why all my friends are dead. Now if you excuse me, i have to get back to work."

"You blame yourself for all of this, don't you?" I asked as she walked past me and she answered so softly as she opened the door that I just barely heard it.

"Maybe I do, but there's nothing you can do about it, can you, traitor?"

I scowled. She really knew how to hold a grudge...

To Be Continued...


	12. Chapter 12

Just Trying to Forget the Pain

Chapter 12

------Kagome------

I shouted out in joy when I received the letter in the mail saying that I had been hired. Looking in the direction of the school, I gave a small sigh and wondered what it would be like to be home schooled. It would give me more time to do my work and finish my jobs... I had applied to be home schooled a few days ago, and they had yet to accept. Picking up my backpack, I placed it over my shoulder and made my way to school, still being wrapped in bandages across practically my entire body.

After making it school, I saw a teacher motion me over and I hesitated before walking over to him. He handed me a sheet of paper.

"Higurashi Kagome, right?" he asked and I nodded. "Here's your work for the next week. We expect to see you back here next week to turn in the work."

My eyes lit up as I looked at him and I held back the urge to hug him.

"So I'm officially being home-schooled now?"

He nodded and I jumped in the air.

"I won't disappoint you! I'll work really hard and-"

"Just go home and do your work, Higurashi..." he sighed and I nodded, skipping out of the school and back to my home. Slamming the door open, I giggled with delight and set the work down on my table.

"It's good that he did it today, because my first job starts in half an hour!" I chirped, grabbing the supplies that I needed for the day and walking out the door. Sesshoumaru watched as I left, a smile on his face. He was happy that I was moving on, getting over the ache that Sasame had caused by breaking my trust. It's been about a month since that day, and although they occasionally tried to see how I was doing, I made it very clear to them that I didn't want to have anything to do with them.

Sasame seemed kind of upset because of the way I was acting but I ignored it and continued along the path that I was currently following. Sesshoumaru had offered to pay me ten dollars for each demon larva that I killed, and I had just been accepted into a new job this morning, saying that my day would begin at 9:00 am. Today was just an observation to day, to see what I would be doing and how it would be done. The other job I had at the club was now a 5 hour shift, which I could handle pretty easilly. It was good pay and was much better than minimum wage. Business at the club had risen ever since I joined in at the bar. Hart happened to attract a lot of females while I was just a guy magnet. That fact alone raised my wage even further.

As I walked into the radio station, I looked around at the people walking around until a man came up to me.

"Higurashi Kagome?"

"Hai."

"You'll be helping out in room 5. Down the hall, third door to your right."

Nodding, I followed his instructions and slowly opened the door to the room. Stepping inside, I saw an all too familiar person sitting in front of the mic as others ran around, getting everything prepared. His eyes flicked towards me and immediately widened as he hopped to his feet.

"What are you doing here?!" we both shouted at the same time.

"I was just hired, I work here now..." I mumbled hesitantly and he gave an amused grin.

"And you've been assigned to this room?"

I nodded. "Yes."

"Then that means that you'll be working with me" he stated and my jaw dropped.

"But- How- I-... No..." I finally groaned, loosely covering my face with my hand. "This can't be happening..."

"It's not _my _fault, _you_ were the one that applied for the job..." Sasame sighed, sitting down again.

"You ready?" a man behind a glass window asked into a microphone and the sound was transmitted to the speakers.

"Yeah, I'm ready" Sasame replied, looking at the man in front of him, eyes calm and collected.

"3...2...1... taping in process."

Sasame then began to speak, his words flowing out of his mouth with ease and it was as smooth as water. I found myself getting addicted to that calm voice of his that he never showed to me when we were talking with each other. They way he acted while recording was completely different and I found myself comparing him to Inuyasha. I stopped myself mid-thought and shut my eyes, trying to calm myself down.

He was talking about pain... about sadness, forgetting, why we should just move on in life, and I found myself arguing with everything he was saying. I didn't want to move on if it meant forgetting _them_, and even then, I would never be able to forget. The Shikon jewel inside of me and Sesshoumaru were constantly reminding me of my past, and no matter how hard I could try, I would never be able to forget my friends from the feudal era, my child, my sister, my brother, my hanyou friend... I could never forget them.

The air became suffocating and I felt myself trembling. I couldn't breathe! Sasame looked at me worriedly and I gave him a reassuring smile. If he stopped then he would have to tape the entire thing over again, and it had been 15 minutes since he started. I could handle another 15 minutes. I would force myself to no matter how much it hurt. I had to get this over with instead of postponing it.

When it had finally ended, I bit back a scream as I leaned against the wall and sunk to my knees, trembling and shivering. I had to calm down. I couldn't stay like this...

"How are you feeling?" Sasame asked softly, worriedly, and I swallowed to make my voice seem stronger.

"I'm fine..." I stated. My voice still trembled, but not as much as I had thought it would.

"Are you sure?"

I hesitated before nodding, forcing out the images in my mind.

"I'm fine..."

Gently taking my arm, he helped me to my feet and I stepped away from him, stumbling slightly. Glancing at Sasame, I saw him staring at me in fear. If it was out of fear _for_ or _of_ me I couldn't tell. I hoped that it was the former and not the latter.

"You're shaking..." he whispered softly and I shied away from his touch this time.

"...I'll be fine..."

He slowly nodded before glancing at the clock.

"Here, I'll walk you to your next job. It's been a while, and I want to catch up on a few things, Kagome" he murmured and I looked up at him before slowly nodding my head. He led me outside and waited for me to catch up so that I could lead the way.

-----Sasame-----

Looking into her eyes, I smiled when I noticed that some of the light had returned to her gaze. After recording, though, the light seemed to dim a little bit and I knew that it was because of my response to the postcard that was sent to me.

"You seem to be doing much better than from when I last saw you, Kagome" I stated and she gave a small laugh, nodding.

"I feel a lot better, and although I still hate being near you people, I'm getting used to it. You people never seem to leave me alone anyways so I guess that there's no point in trying to run away."

I gave a small laugh and playfully poked her arm, showing her a side that I showed her and her alone, no one else. "We can get pretty annoying like that. Hayate was seen as a stalker in Himeno's eyes for a while."

She laughed and continued to look at her feet as she walked. She still wasn't comfortable looking at me quite yet, and she tensed under my touch. That told me that she wasn't even close to being comfortable yet.

"How have you been?" I asked and she gave a bitter smile.

"I've been good. I'm having trouble supporting myself and paying off my bills at the same time, though."

"I can tell. You look tired."

"At least I don't have to get up early for school anymore!" she grunted as she stretched. "I just got the go ahead to be home-schooled. I can do my work at my own pace now."

"So that's why you got a job at the station."

I nodded and walked through the club doors behind her. She went into the backroom to change and came back out, leading me to the bar counter. She motioned to a chair.

"Have a seat, I'll make you something" she offered and I sat down in a stool.

"You seem happier."

She gave me a sly grin and served another customer before coming back to me.

"Being left alone by the person who re-ruined your life for half a month can do wonders for the heart, mind, body and soul, Sasame. You should add that to one of your talk shows" she finished and I smirked.

"I'll have to do that sometime, then" I mused and watched as she quickly pulled her hair into a ponytail before washing her hands again.

"What can I get for you?" she asked and I glanced at the choices on the wall.

"Water is fine" I replied and she shrugged, taking a bottle out of the fridge and twirling it around her finger before placing it expertly by my hand. "You know, you shouldn't be working in a place that serves so many alcoholic beverages" I commented, "What would your mother think?"

Her eyes darkened and I knew that I hit a sore subject. "My mother is in the hospital, along with the rest of my family" she stated coldly and I inwardly winced. Wrong topic... She noticed and shrugged. "Fenrir's doing. I don't blame you. It was the DL."

"DL...?"

"Demon Larva. DL is so much easier to say for me for some reason..." she explained.

"Hey! When are you going to serve me, woman?!"

She scowled. "I'll be right over!!!" she hollered and gave me a quick glance before rushing over to the man and serving him. She made small talk with him, and I realized that her talking with me was just a habit she had from the time that she worked here. It was a habit for her to stay and talk with her customers when she wasn't busy. The man chuckled at one of her jokes and I smiled when her eyes lit up with joy. She loved to see people smile... She loved to make other people smile, and that was what kept her going. By trying to ignore pain, she helped people deal with others. That was why she worked at the bar... the pained people usually came to the bars and she helped them cheer up. I also noticed that lots of the other people that I recognized as regulars had switched from highly alcoholic beverages to one of a lower degree, some not drinking any alcohol at all. Kagome was truly amazing...

A man sat beside me, watching Kagome, and he smiled at me.

"That girl, she's a wonder. I had just had a tough divorce with my wife two weeks ago and I was roaming from bar to bar when she picked me up and helped in here" he laughed.

"What did she do afterwards?"

"What did she do? Why, she sat me down and gave me a good scolding! At that time I was thinking, 'the nerve of this woman! Yelling at me without even knowing why I was drunk!' But she proved me wrong. She had heard rumors about me and despite the bad things they said, she sat down and talked to me. Had a nice long conversation. Next thing I knew, I gave up alcohol. If not for myself then for what that woman over there said to me that night."

"What did she say?" I questioned, curious.

"Why, she was shouting 'Getting drunk is no way to escape pain! You're going to regret it later on! It's bad for your brain and kidneys, not to mention the horrible hangovers and throwing up after drinking too much!' I began arguing about how I didn't care and she immediately calmed down and began to tell me a little bit of the pain that she went through. It astounded me, her, a woman so young, losing all of her friends, being forced to move to a completely different area because of her school, and then losing her entire family to a disease! And she was still so happy and alive! Comparing it to my own, I thought 'Why am I doing this? My pain is pathetic compared to hers!' And so I stopped drinking. I've become a regular now. She always knows how to cheer a man up!"

I smiled. "Yes... she does know how to manipulate a man's emotions" I whispered as she smiled and laughed with a new man. I saw admiration in all of their eyes, but knew that they all loved her as a friend and that was all. She was too innocent to take, at least that was the impression she gave off. She was the joy in everyone's lives, a light in the darkness.

The man I was talking to gave me a knowing look. "She is quite pretty isn't she?" he commented and I felt my cheeks warming.

"What are you talking about?"

"I see the way you look at her" he chuckled, "face it, you like her."

"N-no! I don't!" I stammered but that only fueled his laughter more.

"Stop acting so stupid, kid, it's obvious how you see her. If it's not obvious to any of you, then it so obvious to the people watching you from the outside. It's very obvious that you like her a lot."

"It is not!" I whined and Kagome came over.

"Hey, Kouga!" she chirped and the man gave her a charming smile. "What can I get for you today?"

"I'll take a glass of milk."

Kagome smiled. "I see that you're still lying off the alcohol" she commented and Kouga nodded. "That's always a good sign."

"I still can't thank you enough" he chuckled as he took the glass from her.

"Ahh, it was nothing. Seeing sad people makes me feel bad. I have natural urge to cheer them up."

"How's your boss doing? Is he happy about the lowering amount of alcohol being sold?"

Kagome laughed and nodded. "He says that I'm a gift from heaven and that the profit has been rising. He doesn't have to pay for as much disinfectant and he said that alcohol was starting to get expensive. Overall, he's happy that I'm getting so many people back on the right track again."

Kouga laughed and finished his milk, fishing out some money and handing it to her.

"Thanks again, Kagome, expect me here again tomorrow, I never get sick of talking with you. You're a very comforting person to be around. Keep the change."

"Okay, see you tomorrow then, Kouga" she laughed.

"Yep! Look forward to it!" he hollered before walking out. Kagome smiled to herself before putting the money away and walking back over to me.

"Having fun, Sasame?" she asked and I gazed at her.

"Tons" I stated sarcastically and she sighed, waving her hand.

"Whatever, just make sure to pay before you leave. If you don't, then I'm the one that ends up paying for the water."

"You seem to really like this job."

"Of course, it's my life right now. I find comfort in helping others. Doesn't make me feel as useless" she explained before walking to the next customer. I felt a chill run down my spine as my earring glowed and I scowled. Kagome froze as everyone suddenly collapsed. She calmly observed her surroundings and she jumped just as a tentacle shot out from the ground beneath her. She jumped amazingly high, but the tentacle wrapped around her ankle and yanked, making her crash into the ground. She yelped and the tentacle turned to ash.

-----Kagome-----

Sasame was suddenly blurry for a split second before his clothing changed and he helped to fend off the demon larva.

"Beyondios!" Shin shouted and vines shot out of the ground, bringing us to some weird alternate universe thing. Attacks were suddenly bombarding the demon larva and I ran over to it, touching it and sending out a burst of miko ki when I brushed it. I swiftly dodged all of its tentacles and watched as it hit itself on accident. Gracefully hopping and dodging, doing back flips and other evasive maneuvers allowed me to draw its attention from the Knights and Himeno to me. A tentacle suddenly whipped my waist before I could dodge and I winced, hesitating for a split second. That split second was more than enough for it to grab me into its suffocating hold and begin to drain my energy.

"Dammit!" I hissed.

To Be Continued...


	13. Chapter 13

Just Trying to Forget the Pain

Chapter 13

----Sasame----

I heard Kagome scream and I glanced over at her to see her in the hold of the demon larva. I saw Himeno searching for their weak point and I saw horror on her face.

"Where is it?!" I shouted and she shook her head.

"I can't see it...!"

I could feel Kagome's energy fading and I fought harder. Releasing as much ki as she could, she burned the tentacle and it turned to ash as she collapsed to the ground. There was a bright glow around her and she curled up into a ball, whimpering in pain as she gripped her heart.

"Kagome!" I panted and she slowly relaxed. Seeing that the pain had disappeared, I looked back at the opponent and fought with renewed vigor. Himeno's face lit up and she was about to kill it when it vanished, sinking back into the earth.

"...no...!" she hissed and she separated from Shin. "It got away..."

"Will onee-chan be alright...?" Hajime asked and I looked at her. Her eyes were shut and she was sweating... in pain...

"I-I don't know..." Himeno answered truthfully and he looked at me for reassurance. I just continued to stare at her trembling form. The world around us turned back to normal and I saw that the demon had taken its toll. No one was waking... no one was moving... they were all collapsed on the ground, barely breathing.

"We failed this time..." I whispered and Hayate nodded, glancing at Kagome.

"What should we do with her?" Mannen asked.

"...We'll bring her home... maybe then we'll get some answers. I need to know some things about the child. I need to ask him some things about Kagome..."

"Give up, Hayate! They won't answer anything you ask them!"

"Then you ask them! They seem to have taken quite a liking to you!" he retorted and I sighed, once again picking up Kagome's limp form. I refused to believe that I liked her as something more than a friend, and I believe that she felt the same. A good friend at most, but I didn't want to think of her as a lover in any way. I wasn't quite ready for that yet, but as I stood up, her cheek resting against my chest, I couldn't help but feel... complete...

"Onee-chan looks pretty when she looks like she's sleeping" Shin commented, standing on his toes to get a better view. Hajime did the same.

"Come on, Sasame, lead the way" Goh grunted as he stretched and I walked out of the bar and made my way to her home. Sesshoumaru met us halfway and I stiffened. His eyes, however, held understanding.

"They came for her, didn't they?" he questioned calmly.

"Who?" Mannen inquired.

"The demon larva. They came for her, didn't they?"

I numbly nodded and he motioned for me to follow him. He led us into the house and motioned us into a familiar room. The room I recognized as Kagome's. She was limp as I placed her in the bed, still weak and tired, but I felt her ki returning to her quickly.

"You already know that she is the miko in the legends, do you not?" Sesshoumaru murmured and we nodded. "Then you also know that she cannot get rid of the jewel and that it is melded into her."

"She told us that a while back" Kei informed and Sesshoumaru glanced at Kagome, gauging her temperature with his hand. The children seemed scared of him. Perhaps they were scared of him because what I had said. There was also a large aura coming off of him, one that, if I had been even a little weaker, would have terrified me out of all train of rational thought.

"Do you know about what happened to her family?"

"I heard that they got sick and are all in the hospital recovering" I stated and Sesshoumaru glanced at me before walking past me and into the nearby bathroom. I was still astounded by his height. He barely reached my thigh but his actions were... clear... precise... _deadly_...

"She told you half of the truth" Sesshoumaru said loudly as the water turned on. "Her family isn't sick at all."

"Then what happened to them?" Hajime timidly mumbled, still afraid of the demon child. Sesshoumaru stepped out of the bathroom and walked over to Kagome's bed. He stretched out his arm to place the damp towel on her forehead but couldn't reach her.

"Fenrir got them" he grunted as he scowled at the height of the mattress. He gracefully hopped onto the bed, landing on his feet, and I noticed that the bed didn't creak or shift under his landing. There wasn't even a rustle of cloth when he landed and kneeled to place the towel to cool her off.

"Fenrir? How does she know about Kagome's family, Kagome in general?"

"She knows the power that is inside of Kagome and that it can grant its master unlimited amounts of power. She wants it for herself."

"But why? If she collects enough energy then she'll be revived anyways, what does she want with the power inside of Kagome?"

Sesshoumaru sighed and turned to face me, he was as tall as me on the bed, and his golden orbs stared into mine, narrowing slightly.

"Do you know how much power the Shikon holds, Sasame?" he asked and I nodded. "Do you know what it can do? Do you have any clue how much damage it can do if placed in the wrong hands? The entire world will be doomed."

"We know that, kid, but how can she get the power? She'd have to kill- oh..." Hayate trailed off when he realized what Fenrir wanted to do. "But that would mean that she would have to collect all of Kagome's blood, wouldn't it?"

"No. Despite Kagome's belief, the Shikon hasn't molded with her body alone. Yes, it is a part of her, but the power has leaked into her heart, her very soul. To really kill Kagome, you have to remove her soul. Another, more simple way, would be to take complete control over her heart. In other words, to make her love someone so much that she is willing to throw her life away in order to keep that person safe. Then, and only then, can the Shikon be destroyed" he answered and I felt myself beginning to get confused.

"But... in order to make it disappear, you have to make a wish that isn't selfish. Aren't all wishes selfish?" I questioned and Sesshoumaru nodded. "But then how can you destroy it?"

"You can't" he stated nonchalantly and his ear twitched. I heard a small moan from Kagome soon after. Her finger twitched and I felt myself relaxing. Had I really been that uptight about her condition this entire time? I refused to believe it and gazed at her as if I didn't have a care in the world.

"Onee-chan" Sesshoumaru whimpered. The difference between his tone had changed completely when he talked to Kagome, it was so different that I thought that he was a completely different person. His tone with us was cold, warning and, if voices could be, lethal. When he spoke with Kagome, though, it was soft and loving... gentle. I heard him saying something to her, but before I could focus in his words had stopped and the one-way conversation had ended.

Kagome's eyes lit up when she saw Sesshoumaru and she slowly sat up. She then noticed us in the room and she was randomly knocked over again with a scream. Her eyes widened in surprise when a small blonde head was seen on top of her. Shin seemed to have taken quite a liking to her, too. Sesshoumaru glanced at them both, a snarl that I just noticed calming, his clenched fists relaxing.

"Follow me" he commanded to all of us and Shin slid off of Kagome, following Hajime out the door. I was the last one left and, as I looked back at Kagome one last time, I noticed a look in her eye that I didn't recognize as she stared out the window.

"...Kagome..." I whispered and she slowly shifted her gaze to me. She made no movement of acknowledgement, her eyes on me enough to tell me that she was listening. "I-"

"Sasame! Hurry up and get out here!" Mannen shouted and I hesitated, staring at her, before turning away and leaving her alone on her bed.

----Kagome----

_"Once I draw them away from you, I want you to run to the alley that we went through the other day. A demon seed is back there again and I know that the knights can't sense it. If you destroy it before it evolves then everything will be fine. I don't want you to get hurt anymore, and I know that me sending you out to kill the seed is giving mixed messages, but I'd rather risk your safety to kill a seed than risk you safety to kill a larva. Be quick about it though, its almost time for it to evolve."_

'Okay, Sesshoumaru... I understand...' Struggling to my feet, I opened the window and jumped out, cushioning my landing with what little ki I could summon. It was more than enough to keep me safe from the small drop. Racing over to the nearby alleyway that Sesshoumaru was talking about, I felt Sesshoumaru's aura giving off anxious waves. He was worried about me.

I had just raced into the alley when a spike of youki made me shiver. It was so sudden that I opened my mouth to scream but I shut it soon after. No one needed to hear about this. No one needed to know that I was out here, a demon larva less than thirty yards in front of me. After gathering my nerves again, I took a deep breath and stepped into the darkness of the alley, the shadows engulfing me and making a shiver run down my spine. The youki came closer and closer so I stood where I was, knowing that it would come to me. That's when it just vanished.

"Wha-" I began when I felt it but a strong hand clamped over my mouth as I was yanked into a side alley. There was a weird sensation that I recognized as a concealment spell and I tried to look up at the person when I heard a loud crash. I stared in awe. If the person had not pulled me out of the way then I would have been dead. The force of the attack that the demon larva had unleashed was more than enough to kill me if it even touched a hair. The hand over my mouth dropped and I looked up.

"Leave" Sasame's voice whispered softly in my ear and I glared at him.

"No" I argued defiantly.

"You're in no shape to fight, now get back home" he commanded and I shook my head.

"I'm staying no matter what you say."

"What would Sesshoumaru say if he knew that you snuck out?"

"Sesshoumaru was the one who _told_ me to sneak out, so he honestly wouldn't care a single bit!" I bit out. "I can purify the demon larva, now-"

"Then purify it" he stated, looking behind me. I scowled and turned so that my side faced the demon larva behind me. Raising an arm, a burst of ki shot out of my hand and I smiled when I saw it sink into it's body. There was a sudden burst of light and a loud explosion was heard when the ki exploded inside of the demon larva, purifying it from the inside out. I smugly looked at Sasame.

"Told you."

He sighed in defeat and grabbed my hand. There was another flash of light and I was thrown away from him and into the wall on the opposite side of the alley. I cried out in pain and noticed that the edges of everything in my vision were going fuzzy and blurry.

"Ow..." I hissed, fighting off they dizzy feeling. All the colors suddenly turned opposite and I groaned, shutting my eyes. I felt arms lifting me up and I was handed off to someone else.

"Take her, Kei. I have to go somewhere" Sasame mumbled and his aura vanished. That's when I fell into the bliss of unconsciousness, the pain no longer existing.

----Sasame----

"Sesshoumaru" I called and he turned to look at me. "I've come. What do you want to talk about?"

He motioned me over to him and I gracefully stepped across the grass and stood beside him. It was dark out, and Sesshoumaru had called me into the small patch of trees where Kagome had told us a little bit about her past, inside of the park.

"You understood what I said, didn't you, Sasame?"

"About what?"

"If her soul is taken from her, she will cease to exist. Her body will be frozen in time, never aging, never rotting. Her body will exist, but Kagome herself will not."

"What does this have to do with me?"

"I'm getting weaker, Sasame, and I'm willing to look past your faults" he mumbled quietly and I felt shocked at what he was saying. "The mass amount of youki in the area is just making me weaker and weaker. The other day, I really would have killed you, but my energy was getting too low. Every single day, I'm getting younger. Soon I will be nothing more than a pup just born. I cannot protect Kagome forever."

"You want me to protect her."

"Not just you, I want the other knights to protect her as well. I just feel that my pride would be dented for the rest of my life if I had asked one of them" he commented and I gave a small laugh.

"Okay then, I'll tell them what you asked of us to do."

"Do you know the true reason the Knights exist?" Sesshoumaru asked, looking up at me and I gave him a confused look.

"To destroy demon larva and to protect the innocent and/or pure people in the world that had done nothing wrong to be killed. To protect the people from a world of darkness and to find the pretear."

"Who do you think is the most innocent and pure?" he questioned.

"You're making me think" I grumbled and he gave a small smirk.

"Answer, human."

Thinking back to all of the stories that I had heard as a child, one stood out. It was at the top of my head, but I couldn't remember what it was at the moment. Concentrating harder on that one memory, I remembered small details. Japan. Feudal era. Priestess. Pain.

"Kagome..." I replied and he nodded. He then walked away, leaving me to think about the newly found discovery. I had never understood the importance of the story before, and the word 'Guardian' always seemed to pain my parents. They thought that it was idiotic, waiting for a savior that was thought to never come, but now I understood. The 'Guardian' wasn't a protector of the Knights and the pretear, the 'Guardian' wasn't a person who kept everyone safe. She held a much deeper burden. Protecting was indeed troublesome, especially protecting something that could move around, but if the thing could move, then it could dodge.

Kagome, she was the Guardian of the Shikon no Tama, the jewel that could grant any wish, and a guardian of nothing else. Her life would never be like that of a normal teenage girl, and her life could never be the same as a pretear's or a Leafe Knight's or a demon's. She was alone, isolated just because of the way of life the jewel had placed on her. The jewel inside of her. Demon's would be hunting her for the rest of her life, and if the demon succeeded in killing her, then the bond with the jewel would revive her again once it was wished upon, and she would continue the cycle over and over again. She would never live a normal life until the jewel was gone. For good.

I looked up through the leaves in the trees and at the starlit sky. Was this another reason why Kagome refused to become to close to another? Was she scared of becoming too attached because she knew that she would outlive everyone, demons and humans alike?

There was the sound of a twig snapping from behind me and I recognized the footsteps as Kagome's.

"Sesshoumaru told you everything" she said quietly and I turned to face her. I slowly nodded. "Gomen nasai..."

"What...? Why are you apologizing, Kagome?"

"I don't want you to be forced to go through what my friends before had to. I don't want you to die because of me..."

"What are you talking about?"

"...I'm sorry..."

I walked over to her and reached for her but I went straight through her, her image disappearing. My eyes widened in surprise and I spun around, searching for her. What had just happened? Was everything that just happened my imagination or did she summon an illusion...? Not wanting to take any chances, I teleported into a tree just outside of her room. I sighed with relief when I saw Sesshoumaru beside her in her room, taking care of her. She was safe, but what just happened to me made me nervous... I could only hope that it wouldn't happen to the real Kagome...

To Be Continued...


	14. Chapter 14

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters used in this story and I don't own "Hear Me" be Kelly Clarkson. -Sigh- Wish I did, though...

Just Trying to Forget the Pain

Chapter 14

----Kagome----

A tentacle reached out for me and I dodged with ease, grabbing it and releasing the minimum amount of ki needed to destroy the demon larva. I smirked when the energy it stole from me returned and I turned towards the direction Sesshoumaru had pointed out on my cell phone. I sprinted until I felt a familiar pulsing youki and reached out with my senses, my ki forming a web around the area and scanning every aura it touched. My eyes shot open and I turned, facing the demon seed. With a flick of my wrist, it was turned to ash and I heard Sesshoumaru giving directions for one more demon seed, saying that rest could be killed tomorrow when making my way to work and back.

I felt my black hair whip around me as I ran and I was glad that I had put it in a ponytail. I had a lot of head turning to do and loose hair made seeing hard.

_"Turn left now."_

I obeyed and came face to face with a small purple butterfly. Youki pulsed off of it and I didn't hesitate before purifying it. I noticed that more and more appeared and I scowled as they lunged at me, summoning a barrier. They crashed against it and were turned to ash the moment they touched the barrier.

"So, you are the guardian the knights are supposed to protect..." a feminine voice mused and I watched as the rest of the butterflies disappeared. I looked around and saw a woman standing in front of me, clad in black.

"What are you talking about? I have no clue who's supposed to be protecting me but-"

"Don't tell me that you don't know who the Leafe Knights are..."

"They aren't meant to protect me. They protect the people from you, Fenrir. I'm strong enough to take care of myself!"

"We'll just have to see about that, then, won't we dear little Kagome..."

She opened her red eyes and I froze. They were so similar... their shape, their hue... the glowing of the red... I stepped back in fear and felt myself pressed against a wall. I was trapped. Naraku. Fenrir. They were so similar... and I was terrified. The long, flowing, wavy, black hair, the red eyes, the choice of colors in clothing... I shut my eyes.

'Don't think about it Kagome... Naraku is dead...'

"What's wrong, Kagome..." she cooed and I felt my heart clench. Even the way they talked was similar. Something suddenly came flying towards me and I dodged, but my waist was slashed in the process. I yelped and scrambled to my feet.

'...so similar...'

"Run, little Guardian. Run to your pathetic protectors. I'll kill them all one by one, just like Naraku murdered your friends."

I shook my head. "No... No, don't kill them!"

"Why not? I have to if I want to get rid of all the rebels..."

"...no...!" I whimpered and she laughed.

"Run" she hissed, smirking, "Run and live the last few days of your life."

Another attack made me turn and I sprinted as fast as I could back home. I slammed the door open and met Sesshoumaru's worried gaze. Panting, I dropped to the floor and hugged myself, trying to calm myself.

"Onee-chan!" Sesshoumaru exclaimed, shutting the door, and I squeezed my eyes shut.

"It's not real..." I whispered to myself, "...they won't die..."

Sesshoumaru froze. "You saw _her_, didn't you...?" he asked and I gave a tiny nod.

"Hai... I did... I met Fenrir..."

----Sasame----

As I spoke into the mic, I saw Kagome's face going unusually pale. Looking at her, I remembered that she had the same reaction for the first few days that she worked at the station... had something happened to her? She squeezed her eyes shut and dropped to her knees, holding her head. In alarm, I shot to my feet and ripped the headphones off of my head, placing them on the table in front of me before racing to her side.

"Are you okay?" I asked and she nodded, taking in deep, shaky breaths. I brushed her shoulder and she flinched. I quickly pulled my hand back. Something wasn't right. What was going on with her? She hadn't acted like this since I broke her trust in me, and even then, we had gotten together and became friends. Why was she acting like this now?

She looked up at me, a shaky smile on her face. "Don't worry about me, go and record. I'll be fine."

"Are you sure?"

She nodded and I took a step back, starting to turn. I walked back to the chair and watched as she shakily got to her feet before grimacing and racing out the door. Looking back at the people behind the glass in the other room, I saw them watching her in worry. They soon got back on track and gave the countdown. The familiar jazz music turned on and I glanced at the postcard.

"Today, we have another postcard from Miss Silk..."

After recording, I quickly walked out of the room and found Kagome outside of the radio station, taking deep breaths to calm herself. She looked better than before, the color now returning to her face. I walked over to her and saw her staring blankly at the sky. Her eyes moved to me and I saw her drop her gaze.

"How are you feeling?"

"Better than before..."

"I can tell... So, you still plan on going to the bar?"

She nodded and I sighed, beginning to make my way down the steps. I looked back at her and saw her eyes on me. They looked... sad... for some reason.

"Are you coming or not?" I questioned and she blinked before nodding and scurrying down the steps to make it back to my side. After giving her a quick glance, I smirked and decided to show her _that_ side of me again. Grabbing her wrist, I jabbed her forehead with my finger.

"Itai..!" she hissed and glared at me. "What was that for?!"

"Do you know how worried you got me?" I growled playfully and she scowled.

"No, and I don't really care to be honest."

"Really now? Do I really only mean that much to you? I'm-" I cut myself off when she froze. "Kagome?"

"...sorry" she apologized and ran ahead, leaving me behind. I was confused. Did I say something wrong again? Deciding to leave her alone, I followed behind her at a distance and walked into the bar just in time to see her being dragged onto the stage again.

"Okay, well, since I'm being forced to do this again, I expect to get a bonus for this, boss. You hear me? I'm _entertaining_ the customers, not serving them, so I better get some sort of treat!! Anyways... I guess, since I'm probably going to be doing this a lot, I'll start with a tiny little commentary about my choice of songs..."

"Just hurry up and sing!"

"Fine... fine..." she sighed into the mic and shut her eyes when the soft sounds of a piano rang out.

_Hear me... Hear me _

You gotta be out there  
You gotta be somewhere  
Wherever you are  
I'm waiting…  
Cause there are these nights when  
I sing myself to sleep  
And I'm hoping my dreams bring  
You close to me  
Are you listening?

The resounding sound of a cymbal and the entrance of electric guitars signalled the chorus.

_Hear me I'm crying out  
I'm ready now  
Turn my world upside down  
Find me  
I'm lost inside the crowd  
It's getting loud  
I need you to see  
I'm screaming for you to please  
Hear me...hear me_

The guitar died out and the music relaxed back into its original mood.

_I used to be scared of  
Letting someone in  
But it gets so lonely  
Being on my own  
No one to talk to  
No one to hold me  
I'm not always strong  
Oh I need you here _

Are you listening?

She sounded pained now, and the words began to take their toll on her body. She really was crying out, she was desperate and scared.

_Hear me I'm crying out  
I'm ready now  
Turn my world upside down  
and Find me  
I'm lost inside the crowd  
It's getting loud  
I need you to see  
I'm screaming for you to please  
Hear me_

_I'm restless and wild  
I fall but I try  
I need someone to understand  
(Can you hear me?)  
I'm lost in my thoughts  
And baby I've fought  
For all that I've got  
Can you hear me?  
_  
_Hear me I'm crying out  
I'm ready now  
Turn my world upside down  
Find me  
I'm lost inside the crowd  
It's getting loud  
I need you to see  
I'm screaming for you to please  
Hear me _

Hear me, Hear me, Hear me,

Can you hear me?

Hear me, Hear me, Hear me,

(Oh, ohoh ohoh ohoh)

Hear me, Hear me, Hear me..

I noticed a small glistening tear rolling down her cheek and I looked at my feet, trying to decide if she really wanted me to hear that or not... Feeling a light throbbing in my head, I sighed and turned around, walking back outside. I was positive that something had returned her to the state she was in before she supposedly 'healed', but what? I was getting _really_ frustrated and annoyed now.

----Some Time Later----

"So, what can I get for you Sasame?" she chirped as I sat down on a stool at the end of her shift and I stared at her. She gave a nervous laugh and took a step back. "Maybe I should ask you after you've cooled off a bit...?"

"I don't need anything right now... I'm just waiting here so that I can send you back home. I have a few things I want to ask you."

She hesitated before nodding and moving onto the next customer. Watching her move around while taking a few glances at the clock, I waited for her by the front door when her shift had finished. She skipped over to me and I walked her back home in the darkness. In all honesty, I would have left her alone to walk home by herself if I didn't feel a pair of eyes watching us all day long. It made me uncomfortable so I had decided to walk home to make sure that she was safe.

When we got to her house unscathed, I was surprised when Sesshoumaru allowed me to go inside. After Kagome had gone into her room to change, he told me to go outside and watch. At this my face immediately turned a slight shade of red.

"I can't watch her change! I'm not like that! I'm not some perverted-" I hissed but he interrupted with a glare.

"Do it" he commanded, cracking his fingers, and I quickly obeyed. That's what led me to where I am now, sitting in a tree outside of Kagome's window and scowling as I watched Kagome change. As she lifted her shirt, I was about to look away when I saw a large scab on her waist. That caught my attention and as she changed, all I noticed were her scars. They were all over her body, marring her skin. What had happened to cause all of those injuries?

'Demons. She is, after all, the miko taking care of the jewel... but... what caused the new-' My earring flashed right after she finished changing and it caught Kagome's attention. She was about to see me when she suddenly whirled around, facing a new intruder in her room. She took a step back, closer to the window. I noticed that she was trembling.

Something suddenly shot towards her and she screamed, putting up a barrier. When the attack had ended, the barrier disappeared and a familiar woman grabbed Kagome by her throat lifting her in the air. That was it. I just sit by and watch anymore.

----Kagome----

I clawed at Fenrir's arms, trying to release her grip on my neck. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't do anything except to pathetically struggle against her enormous amount of youki.

"How is your wound, Kagome?" she taunted, gripping harder. I coughed and released my energy, burning her. She hissed and dropped me to the ground. I felt my wounds reopening and I cried out. "You're lucky I'm not at full strength, miko" she hissed. "Don't expect to be saved by one of your nights next time. I'll end it, and if you're knights try to stop me, then I'll kill them in the process. The next time you see me will be the beginning of the last chapter of your life's story. Get ready to die." With that, she vanished, and I saw Sasame appearing where she was moments before.

"Kagome!" he exclaimed, running over and grabbing my trembling shoulders. "Kagome, did she hurt you? Of course she hurt you, what am I talking about? Where's the wound?"

I whimpered and let my shoulders sag, lowering my head. I felt the blood gushing from the reopened wound but I ignored it.

"...Kagome...?" he whispered softly and I flinched. He gently took my chin and raised it so I looked straight at him. My eyes widened in horror when I saw his silver/white hair and I shoved him away.

"No..." I whispered, shaking my head. "Leave me alone..." He got back up, looking down at me with confusion on his face. "...leave me alone..."

"Kagome, its me" he reasoned, stepping closer and I cowered. Stopping, he looked behind himself to see Sesshoumaru. "What's wrong with her...?" he asked and Sesshoumaru thought for a while before answering.

"Fenrir has awakened her memories again. This time, though, she's in an even worse state than before. Your silver hair reminds her of Inuyasha. He my half brother, her former love, and her guard during the shard hunt. He was a traitor to the very last moment of his life, caring more about the wish he wanted for the jewel than Kagome's own feelings and well-being."

"So she sees him in me..." Sasame whispered and Sesshoumaru nodded. I knew it was true, too. I saw Inuyasha in Sasame every time I looked at him... his hair was the only reason...

----Sasame----

Looking back at Kagome, I saw her slumped shoulders, her slightly limp body... she looked so... defeated... Ignoring what Sesshoumaru said, I walked over to her and saw the look of horror on her face.

"Get away from me..." she whimpered.

"Kagome. Look at me and look at me well" I commanded, annoyed that she found me so similar to that... that... _thing, _whatever 'thing' was... She refused and I grabbed her chin, forcing her to look at me. I was surprised when I felt a drop of liquid on my thumb. She squirmed out of my grasp and moved her head to the side, not looking at me again. I sighed and sat down, staring at her and the reddening shirt she wore. "Do I really look like that dog demon?" I asked and she slowly shook her head. "Then how can you possibly mistake me for him?"

She pointed at the top of my head and knew she was talking about my hair. Sighing again, I looked around and yanked the blanket off her bed, placing it on top of my head.

"Better?" I asked and she looked at me. My heart ached at the look in her eyes, they were dull and held no life, but the moment she saw the blanket on my head, she gave a shaky laugh.

"...yes..." she whispered and I grabbed her, careful of her scab, and pulled her closer. I grabbed a damp towel that Sesshoumaru had sneaked in and slowly lifted her shirt. I began to clean the wound for her, occasionally glancing at her face, and saw that she didn't show any pain other than a small grimace here and there.

"You're used to this..." I commented and she lowered her eyes. "You're much stronger than I thought you would be..."

She shook her head, not agreeing. "I can't even protect myself from Fenrir... I'm a weak and horrible miko..."

"I'm not talking about physical strength, Kagome, I'm talking about willpo-"

"I have no strength, Sasame... I've given up" she interrupted and I stopped, setting the towel down and picking up the bandages. I began to wrap it and didn't speak again until I was almost done with the bandaging. There was a long silence where none of us spoke at all.

"Have you given up all hope?" I asked softly and Kagome shut her eyes. "Have you given up on life?"

"...I have no reason to live..." she replied softly and I groaned.

"Don't say that..."

"I'm just telling the truth..."

"No reasons at all?"

"None."

"What about Sesshoumaru?"

"He's strong enough on his own, he'll survive."

"The rest of the people?"

"What's the point? They're all going to die anyways."

"Us Knights?"

"You can defeat Fenrir by yourselves, I'm just a burden right now."

"Me?" I asked softly and her eyes snapped open in surprise. She dropped her gaze and turned mute, not wanting to respond. "Answer..." I pleaded softly but she turned away. I stared at the ground waiting for her to speak. I would be patient. I wanted the answer _now_, even if it hurt me.

To Be Continued...


	15. Chapter 15

Just Trying to Forget the Pain

Chapter 15

---Sasame---

"You're too curious for your own good" she grumbled right as I finished and she stood up, beginning to walk towards the door to show me out.

"You never answered, Kagome."

"Does it really ma-"

"Yes." She stopped, her back facing me, and her shoulders slumped again, giving her that defeated look that I hated so much.

"...you're also going to end up dying... and I'll be here... alone again... never aging, never changing..." she whispered and I stood up, the blanket on my head sliding off and landing on the ground with a soft 'thud'. I quietly made my way behind her and brushed her arm with my fingers.

"You don't want to be troublesome... is that right? You don't want to see me grow old and die..." I muttered softly, "You don't want me to see you, still looking so young, and regret being with you..."

"I don't want to be hurt..." she stated.

"You won't, Kagome... you're a strong person... Everything will be fine..." I comforted, hesitating before taking her hand in mine. There was a bright flash of light but none of us were thrown back this time. A sudden burst of suffocating emotions filled me and I quickly let go, stepping back. The emotions disappeared and I stared at her in shock.

"So you felt it?" she questioned and I nodded.

"...it was... a horrible feeling..."

She turned to face me and looked at me. "The knights protect me because they believe that I am innocent... pure... but I lost all of that the moment I killed my first demon. I've killed so many now, that I'm one of the most tainted people to exist..."

"I don't care."

"But I do."

"You're still pure in my eyes."

"My hands are covered in blood."

"So are mine." I stepped closer to her, taking her hand in mine again. As the flash of light engulfed us, I prepared myself for the oncoming wave of pain that I would feel. "We may not be able to prêt, Kagome, but we are still connected" I stated calmly, pushing away the pain in my heart that came crashing through from the touching of our hands. "If you refuse to live, then everyone will be affected by your decision. Me especially, now that the connection is complete."

"You're not going to give up, are you...?" she laughed sadly and I shook my head.

"Nope."

She sniffed, wiping her newly formed tears on her sleeve. I slowly let go of her hand and lowered her arm while I gently cupped her cheek in my other hand. Leaning down, I softly pressed my lips against one of the dripping diamonds. She tensed for a split second before lowering her head and placing her forehead against my chest.

"All I wanted to do was forget..." she sniffed, trembling. I wrapped my arms around her and held her closer, placing my chin on the top of her head. "That's all I ever wanted... but I'm reminded of them every time I see _anything_..." In an attempt to comfort her further, I began to rub small circles on her back. "All I want to do is forget... but I can't..." She was crying again... I shut my eyes and held her closer, being careful of her injury. After what seemed like forever she was beginning to relax, and as her breathing calmed, I was positive that she could hear the rhythmic beating of my heart as the tears slowed, but continued to fall.

----Kagome----

'...why...?' was the only word going through my mind as Sasame held me and I squeezed my eyes shut, engulfed in his comforting warmth.

Th-thump

The beating of his heart captured my attention and I realised just how much I missed being held in such a way.

Th-thump

I relaxed and leaned into him, accepting his comfort for now.

Th-thump... th-thump...

'...why...? ...why is he doing this...?'

I felt myself falling into sleep and I welcomed it, my body beginning to weaken. I felt Sasame shifting and I heard a tiny grunt deep in his throat as he lifted me. The sudden movement drove me out of the hold of sleep and I slowly opened my eyes to see my bed. He was about to set me down but I tugged on his shirt. He looked down at me.

"Yeah...?" he asked softly and I felt my grip tighten.

Th-thump

"Don't leave... please..."

His heart skipped a beat.

"I won't..."

Th-thump

I felt my eyes shutting and I relaxed completely in his hold. I felt him sit on my bed and turn so that his back was against the wall. The tears stopped.

Th-thump

"...I never will..." he whispered softly and I gave a small smile as I drifted off the rest of the way into sleep in his warm embrace.

----Kei----

"Where the hell is he?!" Hayate growled and I couldn't help but smile at his impatience. "He was supposed to be here hours ago! Dangit, Sasame, how could you be _ditching!"_

I found myself agreeing and I felt a small bubble of annoyance growing inside of me. "I'll look for him" I sighed and everyone nodded, wondering what could cause him to be so late. He was always on time, and it was practically unheard of for him to actually _ditch_ an important meeting like he was right now... I had a small inkling of an idea on his whereabouts, and I teleported to the Higurashi Residence. I hopped into a tree and noticed a dimly lit room. Looking into it, I couldn't help but give a small smile at the sight.

Sasame was sitting on Kagome's bed, one arm hanging loosely around the girl's waist while the other was wrapped around her shoulder, holding her up as he leaned against the wall. The girl sat in between his legs and leaned against him with her side pressed against his body, her cheek against his heart. His eyes held an all too familiar gaze and I watched as he glanced over at me. I stood on the tree branch, a smile playing on my lips before appearing in the room.

"I know that I'm missing the meeting..." he said softly, slightly tightening his hold around her waist. He didn't want to leave.

"You have a good reason to" I commented, motioning towards the girl in his arms. He glanced at her, eyes softening slightly. "The girl was scared, wasn't she? I can sense _her_ lingering energy in this room."

"Yes... she was being torn apart by her. Fenrir attacked her when she was still emotionally weak."

"Then stay here. I'll tell the others that you're helping Kagome deal with the emotional damage that she recieved."

He nodded, but I knew that wasn't the only reason why he lingered. He wanted to stay by her side just for the sake of being by her side. He loved her, and love was something that I hadn't seen in his eyes for far too long.

----Himeno----

Okay. Sasame wasn't at the meeting yesterday and that _really_ bothered me. I mean, Kei told Goh what had happened and why Sasame wasn't going to show, but he didn't tell anyone else! And that's why I'm stomping up the steps to the station on my day off from school. I had a few things to yell at him about, and he would be getting off right around now.

Storming down the hallway his room was located in, I barged into his recording studio to see him pulling a girl closer to him. I raised an eyebrow in amusement and watched, deciding to see how long it would be before he noticed me.

"Why aren't you talking to me anymore?" he asked and the girl looked away, her black hair flowing around her before floating into their original spot down her back. He noticed me and smiled. "Hello, Himeno" he said and I skipped into the room, looking at the lucky lady in Sasame's arms. My eyes widened in surprise.

"K-Kagome?!" I exclaimed, jumping back and pointing at her. "What are you doing here?!"

"I work here" she replied and I gave a small, confused nod.

"O-okay... I guess that's why you're here, but why weren't you at school?"

"I'm being home schooled."

"Oooohhhhhhhh..."

She hesitated before looking at Sasame. "Will you please let go now...?" she asked softly and Sasame's eyes flickered with slight hurt before he obeyed. She turned and walked past me, uncertainty showing on her face as she stared at the ground. After she had made it out of hearing distance, I smirked and nudged Sasame with my elbow.

"So... unrequitted love?" I teased and Sasame glanced at me.

"Fear" he corrected and my eyes narrowed as I thought it over.

"That... kind of makes sense... What's she scared of?"

"Everything. Did you ever notice how tense she was when she went to school with you?"

"Nope!"

He sighed and walked past me. When I didn't move, he stopped and turned around to look at me, motioning for me to follow. I did and we began to walk down a street that I knew was famous for its many bars and clubs.

"Ummm... where are we going?" I questioned when he suddenly turned and walked into a club. I followed him, not wanting to be left alone on the street. He stopped and gently nudged me in front of him, pointing at the bar. I saw Kagome there and my brain began to ache with confusion. "What's she doing here, Sasame?"

"Watch."

She served the guests at the bar and made small talk with them, but as the people cheered up, Kagome herself seemed to ache inside. The men all left, laughing and feeling completely different, but Kagome herself just got worse and worse. Her eyes dulled, but when the people laughed, she laughed along anyways. A man shoved past us and stomped over to the bar and sat down a stool, furious. Kagome tried to help him but he ended up shouted at her.

"What the heck?! She's just trying to help you, you stupid-"

"Himeno" Sasame interrupted, grabbing my arm before I could run down there and give him a good lecture. "She knows what she's doing. Watch."

I sighed and crossed my arms, glaring at the man. He was furious, yelling and screaming now, but Kagome just stood there and listened to his ranting. When he finally calmed down a little, Kagome rested her elbows on the counter and placed her chin in her hands. She spoke softly and slowly. The man in front of her eventually relaxed and he gently hit his head against the counter. She ruffled his hair as she went down to eye level with him and smiled, talking again. The man nodded and sat up as Kagome made him a drink and placed it in front of him. He shook his head and Kagome smiled more.

"I don't get it..." I mumbled.

"He's giving up on alcohol" Sasame responded and I nodded.

"Oh."

Kagome served the other people for a few minutes before coming back to him. He seemed normal now, laughing and making jokes as if nothing had ever happened.

"Sugoi..." I whispered. "She's a miracle...!"

Kagome suddenly turned with a small bow and apology before racing into the back room. Sasame let go of me and I saw him run in after her. Okay... now I was _really_ confused.

----Sasame----

I burst through the doors of the backroom and saw Kagome standing there, her back facing me. I walked over to her and gently touched her arm. She flinched and I pulled my hand back.

"Kago-"

"Why did you stay with me last night?" she asked quietly and I hesitated before reaching out for her again.

"I stayed because you asked me to." I pressed the palm of my hand against the back of her hand and interlocked our fingers. "You didn't want me to leave."

"I was desperate for company. Don't take it too personally."

I once again pulled her closer.

"Too late for that..." I whispered softly in her ear and she tensed, squeezing her eyes shut. "Just listen to me, that's all I want you to do... hear me out this- Kagome...? Are you alright...?" She was getting heavier, as if her legs couldn't support her anymore. She dropped to her knees and my earring flashed. A woman stepped out from the shadows and I gritted my teeth as I stiffened.

"...Takako..." I hissed, fighting down the emotions bubbling up inside of me. I felt pain coming from Kagome and I realised that I was still holding her hand. I slowly loosened my grip and she tightened hers. She knew... "Kagome... come on... snap out of it...!"

"...Go to her..." she whispered, her hold finally loosening, and my eyes widened slightly. "Go... I know that emotions can't be changed... please, Sasame... go to her..."

"But-"

"I'll be fine, really!" she reasoned, looking up at me with a smile plastered on her face. Her light-heartedness transferred through her hand to me.

"Come on, Sasame..." Takako stated, holding her hand out to me. Kagome's hand dropped out of mine and I gave her a look of distress. I really had no idea what to do. I hesitated before taking a step towards Fenrir, then another. I finally reached her and placed my hand on top of hers. She smiled and I shut my eyes, taking a deep breath. There was a flash of light as my outfit changed and I shot my power into her hand. She cried out and let go of me, using her own power to knock me away. I landed on my feet and skidded to a stop before standing up straight again. That's when I noticed something.

"Kagome?" I called. The aura I recognized as Takako's disappeared, Kagome's with it, and I glared, chewing on my bottom lip. "Kagome?!" I hollered. Nothing. "Dammit!" I shouted as I slammed my fisted hand against the wall just as Himeno came in.

"S-...Sasame...?" she stammered and I looked at her. "I felt the presence and I tried my hardest to get here but here were all of these people in the way and-"

"She's gone" I interrupted.

"What do you mean."

"Fenrir... she took Kagome..."

Himeno's eyes widened in surprise and she shook her head. "No...!" she gasped "Do you think that she knows how to get the jewel out of her...?"

"I don't know... She sure as hell better not know how, though..."

To Be Continued...


	16. Chapter 16

----Kagome----

I groaned as I slowly opened my eyes, my head throbbing. "Ow..." I hissed, holding my head. "Why am I always getting hurt...? I don't like getting hurt any-" I cut myself off with a gasp when worry filled my entire being. 'What the heck...?'

"So the priestess has finally awakened..." a voice sneered and a chill ran down my spine when the voice's owner showed herself.

"Fenrir..." I whispered.

"You remember me! I'm _flattered_..."

"What do you want with me?"

"Isn't it obvious? I want the jewel inside of you."

"You're not going to get it any time soon" I growled and she smirked.

"Why? Do you seriously believe that your dear little Sasame is going to come and save you? Inside you know that he's not going to come, so why do you even try?"

"I'm almost positive that he's going to come, if not for me then for you. Besides, Himeno is with him. The others are going to come if Himeno comes to search for me, which I am _certain_ she will."

"You felt his emotions, didn't you?" she cooed and I tensed, squeezing my eyes shut.

"...I decided to look past that. I know that old emotions can't change, but new ones can grow..." I whispered and she smirked as she walked closer to me.

"He doesn't love you Kagome, it's all fake. Do you know why he likes you? He sees _me_ every time he looks in your eyes, because you're very similar to how I was back then. Just like Inuyasha saw Kikyo inside of you."

I shook my head. "...no... I won't believe you..."

"So you do care for him? I'm amazed. He seems so emotionless now, doesn't he? Shame, he used to be so much more outgoing... but all of that changed when-"

"So _you're_ the one who did it..." I hissed and she smirked.

"Did what, my dear?"

"_You_ turned him into what he is now...!" I snarled, energy flaring. Confidence filled me, along with hope. I knew that the emotions inside of me were from Sasame and that he had finally found a way to reach me. Some times the bond was really helpful...

"Okay, I admit it, I am at fault when it comes to Sasame's current actions" she sighed and I glared.

"You know, I never really was fond of your sarcasm, it isn't funny at all, Fenrier, Fenner, Fen- Dangit, why does your name have to be so hard to pronounce? Fen-rear! Okay, that's close enough for me. Fenrear sounds pretty similar to whatever your name is so meh, whatever. Good enough, ne?"

"Why you-"

"Kagome!" Himeno shouted as she suddenly appeared but I ignored her, enjoying the emotions I was making Fenrear feel. I was faintly aware of the others entering the room with Sesshoumaru and continued with my 'rant'.

"You know, you kind of remind me of my old enemy Naraku- Wait..."

"Are you alright Kagome?" Himeno asked and I ignored her, letting my dramatic pause take place.

Sesshoumaru groaned and everyone looked at him. "Oh no... not again..."

"What's 'not again'?" Shin asked and Sesshoumaru sighed.

"You'll see in... 3... 2... 1..."

"Oh, hey... Naraku? Is that you...? Did you get contacts?! I could have sworn your eyes weren't green before. Wait a sec... if you got glasses then that means that you're either a lazy cow that sits and watches TV all day, a video game freak, or a nerd... HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! OH MY GOD!!!! NARAKU!!! A _NERD_!"

"...is onee-chan alright...?" Hajime asked and Hayate scowled.

"She's lost it... she's finally gone insane..." he mumbled.

"The pain's gone to her head" Goh commented, sweatdropping.

"You know, I never thought that you'd wear lipstick, although it's a little too bright for your skin. It does give you a very feminine touch, though. I'm proud of you, Naraku! I always knew that you were a girl at heart!" I chirped. "It doesn't really match with your clothing, though."

Himeno grinned, finding the ongoing conversation _very_ amusing. Sesshoumaru, knowing exactly what I was talking about, forced down a smile.

Gasp "You grew out your hair!!! PRETTY!"

The first one fell, laughing. The small, childish voice alerted me that it was Shin.

"You know, to be honest, I always was jealous of your hair, never getting any knots and all..."

Sasame's mirth filled my entire being as my words forced out a choked laugh from his throat.

"Just black and purple fits you so much better than the blue, too. If you're evil, you shouldn't be wearing that shade of blue... its too... _nice_ looking, and you, Naraku, are pure _evil_! Hear that? EVIL! EVILLY EVILLY EVIL EVIL!!!!!"

Mannen let out a howl of laughter as he collapsed to his knees, tears dripping out of his eyes. I glanced at Kei and saw him holding back laughter. Sasame was slowly beginning to turn around now, his shoulders trembling with contained humor and Hajime knelt over, holding his stomach.

Fenrir turned a slight shade of pink but I ignored it and continued on, noticing something different. "YOU ACTUALLY THREW AWAY RAFFIKI'S DEAD BODY!!! I WANTED THAT! Actually, I kind of wanted to hang it on my wall and that's about it..."

"Who the hell is this Raffiki?!" Fenrir snarled and I felt my eyes widen.

"You don't know? You poor deprived child!!! He's the awesome baboon on the Lion King that chants 'ASANTE SANA SQUASH BANANA!!!' Hey, that's fun... Asante sana squash banana! Asante sana squash bana- Hey, Hayate, you okay? You're turning a wonderful shade of blue. Try breathing, that might help you return to your normal color...!"

Kei snorted and began to chuckle, his chuckles turning into full out laughter. Sesshoumaru also began laughing, remembering the horrid baboon pelt that Naraku had once worn. Sasame's head was gently placed on a nearby wall now as he gently pounded it with his fist. Although it wasn't loud, I could hear his laughter as well. Goh quickly turned around, squatting in the process as he held himself and snickered.

"Shut your mouth before I'm forced to tear that small voice box from your throat, human."

"You know, your torturing skills have diminished quite a bit, I could have sworn that that last insult was a compliment! Oh... you don't have that bone armor crap anymore...? Darn! I wanted to poke it once to see what it felt like!"

Hayate couldn't contain it anymore and he burst out laughing.

"Oh my god! You switched from bugs to butterflies, too! I have to agree with your decision there, though. Those butterfies you use now are so much PRETTIER!"

Everyone was laughing now, and Fenrir was furious. I quickly dismissed that threat, though.

"Dang, Naraku! You used to be so good at manipulating people! Now... even _I'm_ better at it than you and that is a _sad_ thought! I mean, I SUCK at manipulating people! Plus, what did you ever do to Kagura and Kanna? Sure, one was extremely disobedient and the other held onto your portable TV, A.K.A your sanity, but- Oh my god... no wonder you're insane!!!"

"Why you little-"

"Hey, do you still use that miasma? I havent seen it in a while and honestly? I don't miss is. That crap smelled HORRIBLE! No wonder it was poisonous!"

"I am _not_ Naraku, now cease your useless rant!" she snarled and I felt someone grab my wrist, dragging me off.

"Hey! I'm not done yet! I have more questions and-" I felt lips on mine and my eyes widened in surprise. "What the hell did you just do, Sasame?" I asked and I noticed our new surroundings. We were back in the all too familiar park where the trees were plentiful, along with the fountains and ice cream stands. "Where's Fenrear? and where did the scary dark-black room go?"

"Ooooohhhhhh!!!! Kagome and Sasame sitting in a tree, K-I-"

"Shut it, Mannen!" Sasame shouted and the boy smirked, sticking his tongue out.

"Make me!" he teased. I saw the others still giddy with laughter as they leaned on trees and eachother for support.

"Oh... oh my god...!" Himeno panted in between breaths. "Those was by far the _best_ insults I've ever heard made towards Fenrir!"

"She only spoke the truth" Sesshoumaru commented, leaning against my leg as he calmed himself down and I ruffled his soft, silky hair.

"Asante Sana Squash Banana!" Shin chanted as he skipped around me, Hajime following soon after and I laughed. Sasame's hand gripped mine and my eyes widened before I yanked my hand away from him.

"_Don't_ touch me..." I snarled out of reflex and he stepped back in shock. Everyone else suddenly froze as they stared at me, their humor suddenly dissipated with the sudden outburst. I lowered my head and looked at the ground before looking up with a smirk as I stepped away and walked over to Shin. "Would you like some ice cream?" I asked and he nodded excitedly.

"Hey! I want some too!" Mannen whined and Hajime eventually chimed in. I sighed and nodded.

"Okay, okay, what types do you want?" I questioned as I made my way over to the ice cream stand and they all blurted out their answers at the same time. "Whoa! Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa! I can't hear you all at the same time! Say them slowly, and one by one so that I can actually understand you guys."

"Awwww..." all three whined and I laughed.

"Hey! I want some too!" Himeno hollered, running after us, catching up with us seconds later.

-----Sasame-----

"What was that all about?" Goh asked and I looked at my hand, confused. Had something gone wrong with the transferring of emotions...? Or did fenrir already take her toll on Kagome before we got there?

"The jokes she made were out of fear" Sesshoumaru suddenly stated and I glanced at him. "She was scared, and if you were listening, you would have noticed that the jokes started right after we entered the room."

"What are you trying to say?" Hayate asked and Sesshoumaru looked at me, narrowing his eyes in seriousness.

"Kagome's fear of Fenrir wasn't what started the joking. She was scared of you, Sasame."

I groaned. "Back to square one..." I moaned and the others looked at her, then at me, confused.

"What did you do now, Sasame?" Kei sighed.

"I-"

"He showed Kagome his emotions on accident" Sesshoumaru answered for me and all the attention turned to him.

"Care to clarify, kid?" Hayate grumbled and Sesshoumaru gladly obliged.

"Basically, Sasame had finished creating the connection between himself and Kagome in order to protect her sufficiently. Through a strong connection, the emotions of the guardian and her knight are transferred through eachother. Sometimes, if the bond is strong enough, they can even hear eachothers thoughts. If the connection is weak, then the two must be in a certain radius of eachother in order for it to come into affect, as in a radius of a minimum of 15 feet."

"What does this have to do with Sasame?"

"Oh, simple, by touching Kagome's hand when the connection wasn't complete, the affects were still in place when he was at the club with her. When Fenrir, or Takako, appeared, his emotions were linked with Kagome's. If you haven't figured it out yet, his feelings for Takako are what're causing Kagome to be in the state she's in now."

"...Sasame..." Goh mumbled and I looked at him. "...don't tell me that-"

"No, It's-" I began.

"He loved, and still loves, Takako. Simple as that" Kagome interrupted nonchalantly as she came back, the children surrounding her too entranced by the creamy, flavored snow in front of them to care or notice the sudden change of atmosphere.

To Be Continued...


	17. Chapter 17

Just Trying to Forget the Pain

Chapter 17

---Kagome---

"You can't stay like this, onee-chan..." Sesshoumaru whispered and I glanced at him from the fetal position that I held myself in on the bed. Shutting my eyes, I felt the familiar stabbing in my heart before gently touching my lips with my fingertips. "You're going to die if you keep this up...!"

"What's the point, Sesshoumaru...? I can't do anything anymore... I've been tainted..." I whispered and he gave me a confused look, cocking his head to one side. I raised a hand and summoned my once pure ki into the palm of my hand. It glowed black. Sesshoumaru jumped back in shock.

"What is that?!" he exclaimed and I lowered my hand, the ki disappearing.

"I'm not a miko anymore, Sesshoumaru... Fenrir has tainted me..."

"But-"

"I can't purify _anything_ anymore.. not even a demon seed. I've tried... It ended up turning into a larva instead... I can't do anything for the knights anymore... all I can do is hope that nothing will happen, that Fenrir won't call on my ki too often..."

"What are you talking about? Fenrir can't take your ki, It belongs to you and only y-"

"Stop it, Sesshoumaru..." I hissed, touching the slight throbbing in my chest. "She's done something to me... I can't escape her, she's watching me... waiting... I can feel her ki racing through my very veins... It's hopeless... I'm her battery, Sesshoumaru. If she gets weak, she can call upon me and drain my strength..."

"When did this happen?" he whispered and I tensed, placing my forehead on my knees.

"...when Fenrir had captured me... before you came... before I even woke up..."

"I'm sure we can come up with some sort of way to purify the ki! I'll go look it up!" Sesshoumaru stated, racing out of the room. My bottom lip began to tremble and I let out a tiny sob.

"Oh god... save me, Inuyasha..." I whimpered, but why did Sasame appear instead...?

------Sasame-------

I felt my body stiffen and I involuntarilly bristled as I looked towards the direction Kagome's house lied in. I hadn't seen her in over a week now, and I was beginning to get worried. She didn't seem like the type to miss work. Deciding to ask around, I went to the person in charge of hiring people. (What are they called? I can't remember... boss seems a little... wierd to me for some reason when it comes to radio stations...)

"Oh, Sasame, what are you doing here?" he asked as I walked in. He seemed annoyed.

"I was wondering where Kagome was, she hasn't been here for the last few days and I'm beginning to get worried..."

"Kagome? She's home sick. Her little brother has been calling in."

"Is something wrong, sir?"

"I don't understand what's going on... I spoke to her over the phone and she sounded fine to me..."

"Would you like me to check on her?" I asked and he looked at me before giving a sigh and a curt nod.

"I'd like that. If she's not here tomorrow, though, she's fired."

"I'll remember that..."

"Go."

"...hai..."

I walked out of the room, glancing back at the man. He got on my nerves... Shrugging it off, I walked out of the radio station, unable to hold back the awkward feeling that I was drowning in any longer. I burst out into a run, feeling that something horrible was going to happen to her. Soon. The feeling grew worse, and I found myself gasping for breath. Why couldn't I breathe?

'Help...' Kagome's voice echoed in my mind and my eyes widened a fraction. What was going on...? '...help...!'

"Kagome...!" I panted as pan began to fill my senses. I gritted my teeth and continued on. What the hell was all of this pain and what the hell was creating it?!? I had just reached the front door to her home when the pain became too much to bear and I dropped to my knees. "Dammit..." I hissed and the door swung open. Sesshoumaru was standing in front of me, his eyes frantic.

"Sasame!" he exclaimed, grabbing my hand dragging me to Kagome's room. "Help her...!" he pleaded and I was faintly aware of the pained groans that came from inside. When he opened the door, the noises multiplied in intensity and the sounds coming out of Kagome's mouth was enough to make even the most cold-hearted person pity her. Okay, maybe not because the person that was hurting her was obviously enjoying it. She suddenly rolled to the side of the bed and coughed. A sudden pain rose in my throat and I knew that it was what Kagome was feeling. Red liquid dribbled out of her mouth and dropped to the floor as she began to glow a dark purple that slowly turned to black.

'...help... somebody...' she pleaded and I cried out as another wave of pain, this time worse than the last one, hit me and I saw her force her eyes open to look at me.

"why...?" she whispered and I struggled to my feet before falling backwards and leaning against the now closed door. Despair and fear overwhelmed the pain and I grimaced. Did she really hate me that much?

"Kagome... the boss is worried about you..." I ground out and more sadness filled my being.

'...he's just like the others...'

She coughed again and I stumbled over to her to move her hair out of the way. She flinched but coughed out more blood.

"Why are you here?" she asked hoarsely and I shut my eyes in response to the new wave of pain.

"...I share your pain, Kagome..." I ground out through gritted teeth and regret added on to the multiple emotions already swimming around inside me. "Please, Kagome... tell me what I can do to help you..."

'He can't help... why does he even try...?'

"Because you asked me to..." I replied and she squeezed her eyes shut, stifling a cough as she turned her head away from me. I cupped her cheek in my hand and moved her head so that her pained gaze met mine.

"Stop..." she whispered and I slowly moved my hand away.

"Hai... my miko..."

The burning pain suddenly disappeared and a lump formed in my throat. Kagome... what was she thinking...? had I said something wrong again? Looking at my hand, I felt her lingering warmth and the tingling sensation as I clenched it into a fist. A tear rolled down my cheek and I glanced at Kagome to see her lying on her back, blood dripping out of her mouth, tears rolling down her cheeks.

"Please... Sasame... just leave..."

I scowled. "No." She looked at me and turned away when I saw her eyes.

'...he's just like 'him'...'

I took her hand in mine and realised how cool it was. Something wasn't right...

"Are you okay, Kagome?" I whimpered and she shut her eyes, the pain slowly disappearing. "Kagome?" Her breathing slowed to a calming pace and the tears slowly stopped. I smiled softly to myself and stood, my legs still a tiny bit shaky from the pain that I had felt earlier. I wiped away the blood and sat on the bed beside her. Was I really this obsessed with her...? Her eyes cracked open and I realised that she wasn't sleeping, but meditating to calm her nerves. Her eyes dulled when she saw me and I felt my heart drop. I stood up and was about to walk away when her voice stopped me.

"Sasame...?" she whispered and I looked back at her. "Help... me..." she pleaded and I turned back around.

"...you need to make up your mind, Kagome. Do you want me to stay or leave?"

She gave a small laugh and motioned me over. I kneeled by her side and was surprised when there was a stinging pain in my cheek. Touching my cheek, I looked at her in shock. She just slapped me!

"You can go now" she chirped and I scowled.

"You tell me to come back, slap me, and then expect me to leave?" I grumbled, rubbing my cheek. Damn, that hurt... "You must be mistaken, Kagome. I'm not like that."

She sighed and nodded. Looking out the window, I saw those distant eyes again. After sitting back down on her bed, I pressed the palm of my hand on her forehead. Looking at her, I gave a small smile and she glanced at me. Her warmth was comforting, but for some reason, her temperature seemed... off. It felt like 98.7, but something was still wrong...

"You're sick" I mumbled and she gave a tiny smile before nodding.

"Hai. A little."

"Iie... more than a little... what's wrong?" I questioned worriedly and she gave a nervous laugh. "Kagome?" A tear rolled down her cheek and I wiped it away. "Tell me..."

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"I just can't."

"...Kagome..." I stated sternly and she looked away.

"Fenrir" she mumbled.

"What did Fenrir do?" I demanded but she said no more. Sighing, I stood up and brushed my hand against her cheek before leaving again. Sesshoumaru showed me the way out and I hesitated as a stray thought from her mind entered mine.

'He could never love me... We could never be, even if he did... perhaps... this-'

"Sasame! There you are! There's been big trouble at the school! Demon larva!" Mannen panted and I scowled, nodding before running off towards the direction of Himeno's school. Something held me back, though, and I paused before turning around and running back to Kagome.

'-more... it hurts...'

That's when I realised what had gone wrong the moment I left the house. The connection had begun to fade, and was now completely gone.

-----Kagome-----

I touched my cheek, right where his fingers brushed it before he left, and I slowly shut my eyes. 'Is this feeling all a dream...? Could what I feel, what I dream, ever become a reality...?' I scoffed. 'No way... He could never love me... we could never be, even if he did... perhaps... this is for the best... oh god, I don't want this life anymore... it hurts...'

A shiver ran down my spine and I had to fight off the urge to go and hunt for the demon larva that appeared. As I sat up, a hand touched my shoulder and I turned to see Fenrir, a smirk on her face. Lowering my gaze showed that I submitted to her. There was nothing I could do to stop her. Struggling did nothing but make it worse for me and more pleasurable for her.

"I see I've tamed the guardian..." she mused and I stared at her with dull eyes.

"Where's Sesshoumaru...?"

"Sleeping."

"...I see..."

"Don't worry, I didn't do anything too drastic. I won't do anything too drastic to him, either, if you come with me and behave like a good little girl" she bargained and I chewed my bottom lip.

"What do you want with me?"

"Nothing except the jewel inside of you. I want to make a wish on it, to control it."

"For what? What do you want to control it for?"

"Strength."

"Your wish is denied" I stated and a streak of pain raced through my body. I screamed and the pain disappeared. Fenrir was getting stronger at a faster rate than I predicted...

"You're not behaving, miko, but you're not really a miko anymore, though, are you Kagome?"

"What did you do to me, Fenrir?" I questioned and she smiled, poking my heart. I flinched and she grabbed my hair, pulling it back so that my eyes would be forced to meet hers. I yelped in pain and I noticed movement by the doorway. Sasame.

"Come in, Sasame, don't you want to say goodbye to your little hime?"

"I won't let you take her, Fenrir...!" Sasame snarled. His tone scared me, I had never heard him speak to anyone in that way before... it was terrifying, as if he had turned into someone... some_thing_ I didn't know, didn't recognize... I looked at Fenrir and she smirked, yanking me out of bed by my pajama shirt collar and dangling me with ease.

"Put her down, Fenrir!"

"Command her to give me the jewel, first, and then I will release her!"

"I won't command her to do anything!"

"Wish for her to give me the jewel and I will let her survive. I wonder how long she will live with my darkness destroying her from the inside out..." I screamed in pain and Sasame paled. I tried to purify her but remembered all too late that my energy was tainted and that it would have no effect on her anymore. She greedily took the energy from me and I cried out even louder, tears streaming down my face.

"Stop!" Sasame shouted and the pain faded. I looked at him, a look in my eyes that pleaded him not to give into her. "You swear you'll let her down and stop hurting her...?"

"No! Sasame! I'll be fine so-" The pain started up again and I cried out. When the pain disappeared, I felt my eyelids drooping. I was so tired... Fenrir, on the otherhand, looked so much stronger than before.

"Kagome... I wish tha-"

"Your wish is denied!" I snarled but I felt the jewel inside of me struggling with my emotions. Fenrir gave an evil laugh and I saw her staring at my heart with a sadistic smile on her face. Using some sort of magic, I felt her hand enter me and the familiar feeling of my soul being ripped away from me made me freeze with terror, my heart pounding madly in my chest.

"...no...!" I whispered and Fenrir sneered.

"Yes."

To Be Continued...


	18. Chapter 18

Disclaimer: Own Nothing!!!!!

Just Trying to Forget the Pain

Chapter 18

------Kagome------

"No!" I screamed as she began to pull my soul from my body. This was too similar to _back then_. I wouldn't let anyone take my soul, even if it was just a tiny portion of it. I bit my bottom lip and tried to call my soul back to me but it wouldn't. Sasame's wish...

'Dammit! I never should have trusted any of them!!!'

_'But he did it in order to protect you...'_

'He's going to end up killing me!!!'

_'He cares about you...'_

'That's what I thought about Inuyasha, too... but...'

"NOOO!!!" I screamed and my soul came crashing back into me. Hatred, sorrow, envy, loneliness, emptiness... that's all I could feel... had the darkness Fenrir placed inside me already travelled so far...? Affected me this much...? I was surrounded in darkness... It was freezing... where had everything disappeared to? Where was Sesshoumaru...? Where had he gone...? What was taking him so long...?

Why was I alone?

There was a tiny dot of light and I began to move towards it. I was scared... the light was my only source of comfort, but why did it keep moving away? It wasn't getting any closer, no matter how hard or fast I ran. It kept getting farther and farther until there was nothing left... just darkness... the cold shadows engulfed me and I shivered. But inside me, there was still a tiny spark of hope, and that's what kept me from falling into the darkness completely, from drowning in it, and so I was waiting... waiting for someone to come along and free me from the cage I was in. To rescue me...

I didn't have to wait long, though, there was a huge flash of light and worry and regret came crashing into me. Warmth filled me and drove away the cold that I felt. The connection... could it really do this much to a person...? How...?

'His _emotions are not a lie...'_

'It hurts, though... I'm scared...'

_'Love is frightening...'_

The warmth began to fade and I realised how comforting it was, how much I was already beginning to miss it. I tried to keep it close to me, the light, the warmth, I wanted it so badly... When it continued to fade, I reached out for it. I felt my hand connect with something warm, but the warmth slowly slid away from my grasp. Pain suddenly stabbed me all over and my senses were bathed in light. Blurry shapes and colors formed and I recognized a pair of worried gold eyes.

"Sesshoumaru...?" I moaned and he sighed with relief.

"You're awake... the others were worried sick about you."

"...the... others...?"

The sound of rustling clothes alerted me of someone by the doorway and I glanced there to see Himeno and Hayate. They stepped in and I saw the other Knights crowding inside my bedroom.

"What's wrong? You look like you just saw a ghost..." I murmured.

"Y-you've been out for a week, Kagome" Himeno whispered and my eyes widened.

"A week?!" I exclaimed, then noticed that someone was missing. "Where's Sasame...?"

Hayate rolled his eyes as Goh held back a laugh. Kei pointed to the opposite side of the bed and I glanced at the carpet.

"...oh..."

"He rarely left your side, saying that it was his fault that you were in the state you were in. Of course, none of us believed him and we tried to usher him out of your room but he was being stubborn and stayed right where he is now. This is the first time I've seen him sleeping for a few days" Kei commented and I gave a small smile.

"I see..." I laughed.

"We should leave the two lovebirds alone" Sesshoumaru teased and I felt the blood rushing to my face.

"Hey! I-" He shut the door behind him, leaving me in the now empty room with Sasame. I snorted in distaste and pouted as I glared down at Sasame. He faced the wall, slightly curled. "Hey. You. Wake up" I grumbled, poking his shoulder, but nothing happened. I poked his cheek and still, nothing happened. "...Sasame..." I growled, patting his cheek now. He sleepily slapped my hand away and rolled so that he faced me. His hair fell in front of his face and I sighed. He wasn't going to wake up any time soon, apparently... I propped my chin on my elbow and let my other arm hang, poking and prodding him. I knew nothing was going to happen but I could still try, right?

After about another ten minutes, my finger began to ache and I stopped, flopping onto my back and staring at the ceiling. I gave a sigh of defeat and shut my eyes, willingly falling into another state of sleep.

I woke up much sooner, and I felt someone watching me. I slowly opened my eyes and turned my head to see a _very_ drowsy Sasame trying to keep his eyes open as he rested his head on his arms on top of the bed.

"Sasame...?" I asked, confused, but he didn't seem to hear me.

"No... Hayate..." he whined softly, eyes slowly shutting, "stop adding sleeping pills... to my... food... I don't wanna... sleep..."

I stifled a laugh and watched as his breathing evened out, showing that he was finally in a peaceful slumber. There was a slight chuckle from one corner of the room and I recognized it as Hayate's.

"Not my fault you refuse to sleep" he mused, walking over. He gave me a smirk before proceeding over to Sasame and nudging him a few times. "...I think... I may have given him an overdose again... good!" he chirped, satisfied, as he stood up straight. "Hope you don't mind, Kagome, the stupid idiot hasn't slept in two days." I shook my head in response and he nudged Sasame one last time before walking to the door. "Try not to wake him up, not like he will, but try not to."

"'Kay." The door shut quietly behind him and I looked at Sasame. "One of us always falls asleep" I grumbled, poking his forehead. "Annoying..." Sasame's frustration filled my heart as I prodded him and I knew that my actions were causing some aggravation in his dream. He scowled and I couldn't help but laugh. I eventually stopped annoying him when I began to become controlled by his emotions and I waited until I had calmed down. Remembering his glasses, I slid them off of him and gently placed them on the table beside me.

He shifted uncomfortably and I realised how uncomfortable his position looked. I dragged him onto the bed and slid off, trading places with him. My hand brushed against his hair in the process and I found a new love in my life, hell, the hair was better than Sesshoumaru's.

I began to play with my newly found discovery for who knows how long before Sasame shifted and rolled a little bit closer. Light had begun to shine in through the window and I shut my eyes, continuing my play with his hair. I had only stopped for a few seconds before Sasame took an intake of breath and I felt his larger hand take my smaller one. After dozing for about an hour or two, I opened my eyes and saw him still asleep. I smiled.

"How many pills did Hayate _give_ you?" I laughed softly and his grip tightened, signalling that he was waking up. He yawned and blinked a few times before giving a groan that sounded a lot like a whimper.

"My head hurts..." he grumbled and I patted his cheek.

"You'll live" I murmured softly and he gave a tired smile.

"I'm going to killl Hayate..." he moaned and I flicked his forehead. "...ow..."

"No killing a fellow Knight" I scolded lightly and he scowled.

"Fine... I'll murder him, then..."

"What's the difference?"

"I dunno..." he mumbled, shutting his eyes and yawning again. "They're spelled differently..."

"Are you always like this when you wake up?" I questioned and he cracked an eye open, scowling.

"Only when Hayate gives me four times the recommended dose of Nyquil... I don't even have a cold..." he groaned and I laughed. "I think I have a hangover..."

"I'm sure you do."

He sighed and sat up, glaring tiredly at the wall before glancing at me.

"I don't wanna go to work today..." he whined and I couldn't help but smirk. I stood up and ruffled his hair before walking out of the room, fully recovered. I screamed when I was tackled over to the ground and I heard happy laughter.

"Sh-Shin? Hajime? What are you doing?"

"Kagome-chan is finally walking again!!!" they shouted at the same time and I heard Sasame's pained groan coming from inside my bedroom. He really did have a hangover... The children climbed off of me and raced into the bedroom. "SASAME!!!!" they exclaimed at once and I heard a loud crash. Another pained groan was heard.

"Gidoff o' me..." he grumbled and the children's laughter filled my ears.

"Sasame's drunk!!!" they sang as I got to my feet and I saw Himeno and the other Knights making their way over. Hayate was the first to step into the room but he quickly ran back out, swerving and running past me. The wall exploded where he was moments before.

"Get back here!!!" Sasame commanded and Goh gulped before stepping in. There were a few grunts and crashes before Sasame started complaining. "Dammit Hayate! What'id you do to me?!"

Hayate hesitated before poking his head into my room and giving a nervous laugh.

"I gave you the entire bottle of Nyquil..." he replied.

Silence.

"...ohhhh shit..." he whispered.

"DAMN YOU! GET BACK HERE SO I CAN KILL YOU!!!" Sasame shouted and Hayate yelped before racing down the hall.

There was a grunt and Sasame sped past me, following Hayate down the stairs. There was a loud crash before Hayate began to argue with Sasame. Sighing, I shut my eyes in defeat and looked at Himeno. She had the same reaction.

"Too bad Sasame only acts like this when he gets an overdose of medicine..." she sighed and I nodded.

"I wouldn't mind seeing more life in him once in a while" I added.

"Yeah..."

"ITAI!!!" Hayate screamed and we both sighed in unison.

"On second thought, maybe not..." I mumbled and she nodded in agreement.

"They're really loud..." she grumbled.

"...where's Goh...?" I asked and Himeno motioned to my room. I peeked in and gave a nervous laugh. "Is he going to be alright, Himeno...?" I questioned, voice trembling with nervousness.

"Yeah, he'll be fine."

"But... h-he's twitching..."

"Happens all the time when Hayate gives Sasame too many drugs."

"...I see..."

"Its really nothing to worry about, Kagome! Really!"

"I know.. but still..."

"He'll be up and about within the next few minutes."

"O-okay..."

"Oh, don't worry about the foam, either."

"Y-yes ma'am..."

"Wheeee!!!!!!!!!!!" I heard the kids squealing and I glanced at them.

"And... here comes the waking crew..." Himeno commentated.

Hajime jumped... and... I looked away, plugging my ears. There was a loud scream and I cracked my open. Himeno's pitiful look told me that it was just about over. I saw her grimace and wince before relaxing. That's when I knew it was over. I walked away, not even wanting to look inside and see Goh now. After making my way down the stairs, I saw Sasame leaning smugly against the wall, glaring at something on the ground. The sight I saw made me burst out laughing. Hayate scowled at my reaction.

"Aren't you going to help me out of this?!" he growled, struggling to break free from the ropes that kept him from moving. I stifled my next fit of laughter and glanced at Sasame. He just kept glaring at Hayate, 'kill' the only expression on his face.

"I think you've done enough, Sasame..." I commented, shutting my eyes and smiling, and he glanced at me before he sighing in defeat.

"Fine... fine... but once this hangover is gone, I'm going to give him a nice, slow and painful death. That way it won't hurt my ears when he screams."

My eye and mouth twitched as I gave another nervous laugh.

"Eh heh heh heh..." 'Scary...!'

To Be Continued...


	19. Chapter 19

-----Kagome-----

Sasame had eventually returned to normal, for which I was kind of thankful for, but I was still scared of him for a while afterwards. It was only when he gently flicked my forehead that I relaxed. When he was coming closer I thought that he was going to kill me... Fenrir was, surprisingly, ignoring me for a while, and I kind of really enjoyed that.

I was now back at work, serving the poor people at the bar that had greatly missed my presence in my extremely long absence, and because of my 'sickness' and missing too many days of work, I was fired from the radio station... but now I was a singer at the bar for the first hour or so, and a bartender for the rest of the day (I recieved a full-time job there). The others visited often, checking up on me mainly because Sasame had told them what happened to me. I found myself enjoying their company and often found myself wondering when and where I would next be attacked by Fenrir, even though they kept a pretty close eye on me 24/7. Yes, even while I slept... The good thing was that they didn't hide. If they wanted to protect me, they made themselves known instead of staying in the shadows and staying away from me (It made me feel a lot better at night, knowing where they were).

Sasame watched over me the most, and some times I noticed him gradually getting closer and closer. He still kept his distance, though, and I appreciated that. Speaking of Sasame, here he came now. He sat down a few stools down and rested his arms on the table, taking a deep breath and sighing with his eyes shut. Worried, I walked up to him and he cracked an eye open when he heard me.

"You alright?" I asked and he nodded, stretching.

"Just tired is all" he mumbled.

"Everyone's been tired lately."

"There's been more demon larva lately."

"...I know..."

He looked up at me, eyes tired but still comforting. "It's not your fault, Kagome, you didn't choose to take care of the jewel, and we didn't choose to be Leafe Knights."

"I still can't help but feel that it's partly my fault..."

"It's not, so smile as if you don't have a care in the world and act like any other person would."

"It's been so long that I don't _know_ how any other person would act."

Sasame gave a small laugh. "True, true..."

"Who's staying with me tonight?"

"I'm not sure, I think it's Mannen, though."

I gave a nervous laugh. "Looks like _I_ won't be sleeping tonight, either... he always fights with Sesshoumaru whenever he gets the chance..." Sasame sighed again and covered his earring that just gave a blinding flash. "Another?"

"I'll let the others handle it, they can take care of it, but if they need my help they know how to contact me."

"Oh, okay."

"I suggest you start your serving again, people seem to be getting impatient."

I looked around for a second and nodded, agreeing. Many of the usual customers were starting to get edgy and/or bored. After saying a quick apology, I ran off in order to satisfy the other customers. Sasame I saw everyday, but these people were people that I couldn't see and comfort 24/7. Sasame could wait and talk to me later.

"Hey, Kagome, where's the lad that you were talking with just now?" one of the people asked and I looked up from my work. He was gone.

"...I don't know..." I mumbled. My head began to pound and I knew that the demon larvae were getting closer. Where was he?! Everything suddenly froze as the room darkened and I saw the people collapsing onto the ground. "Sasame...!" I whimpered, panicking. I hated being helpless... weak, useless... but at the same time, I knew that if I was cured I would be able to destroy all the demon larva with ease. A tentacle shot out of the ground and I barely dodged it. Had I really gotten this slow and rusty at fighting? I needed to train again. Harder.

Before I knew it, I was surrounded by tentacles and they were coming at me from all sides. I dodged and ducked, jumping and hitting the floor as fast as I could in order to dodge them all but I didn't come out unscathed. Luckily, no serious damage was done. I was suddenly surrounded again, this time so thickly that I knew that I wouldn't be able to escape without being drained half to death. If only I had my purification abilities! A tentacle whipped the ground by my feet, as if teasing me, and I screamed as I jumped back and tripped on a tile, landing hard on my butt.

"Oh god..." I whispered, panicking even more. Alarm filled my heart and I knew that Sasame had felt my emotions. I could feel his heart beating in time with mine and that calmed me by a tiny amount, for his presence alone, even if it was just a minute link, was enough to make me feel safer.

"Sasame! What are you doing! You'll get killed if you-"

The tentacles whipped towards my body. They suddenly changed colors from the dull blue to the grotesque colors of Naraku's. They sharpened to a spear-like point and flew straight towards my heart, exactly like back then, when I was traveling with the rest of the gang. The scenery turned from stone walls and ceiling to trees and a blue sky, dirt was what I was sitting on instead of tile. Everything was moving in slow motion, and I saw Sango in the path of one of the appendages.

"...no..." I whimpered, cowering as I saw it pierce her, "NO!!!"

The world sped up and the tentacles came racing towards me as I curled into a ball, squeezing my eyes shut. A slight feeling of relief washed over me as arms wrapped around me and I buried my face in the comforting warmth of the person that held me.

"Thank god you're alright..." Sasame panted and I fisted some of his clothing in my hand. I was so scared... I felt his muscles stretch as he turned his head to see the demon larva behind him. "Kagome, you can relax, Himeno's got them covered."

Looking down at my empty hand, I saw a red substance smeared all over it. Blood. Fear overwhelmed my nerves and I blinked. The blood was gone when I looked at my hand again. I was hallucinating...

I stared blankly at the wall, the memories from before numbing my entire body. Death... I was surrounded by it... Why was I surrounded by it, though? I was a holy priestess meant to protect both people and the jewel... why was everyone dying...? Sasame set me down and followed my gaze with a confused expression on his face.

"There's nothing there, Kagome" he mumbled but I didn't hear him. Screams... so much screaming... "Kagome...? Kagome!" he called and I slowly turned my head to look at him.

"Nobody... is going to die... right...?" I asked in a whimper and he nodded.

"No one's going to die... It'll be alright."

"There's so much screaming... it's so loud... make it stop... Sasame-"

"What screaming?"

"Make it stop...!"

"There isn't any screaming..."

"It hurts my ears... there are so many voices... calling for me... crying for me... its so loud..."

"...Kagome...?"

"It's so loud..." I was faintly aware of Sasame biting his bottom lip in worry. He was confused, and that was obvious. "Make it stop..."

"How?" he asked but I didn't hear him. He cupped my face in his hands and made me look at him. "How?" he repeated and I shook my head.

"I don't know... but it hurts so much... so many voices... telling me to join them in their pain... in the dark-"

I was cut off when lips met mine and the voices began to fade, my eyes clearing up and losing their glazed look. I was confused for a few seconds, trying to comprehend what was going on, when the hold on my face loosened. Finally realising that Sasame had driven me out of that wierd state I was in before, I gave a slight smile in thanks, kissing back for a second or two before pulling away from him. His eyes were wide with shock and he looked at me with uncertainty on his face, touching his lips with his fingers.

"What did you do with Kagome...?" he questioned and I noticed that the fight had ended and everyone was staring at us in surprise.

"I am Kagome..."

"But... Kagome hates it whenever I get too close to her..."

"It's me, Sasame..." I assured and he looked at me doubtfully. I took his hand in mine and my confusion and disbelief was transferred through to him. He gave me one last look over before taking his hand back and stepping away.

"Sorry..." he mumbled and I looked at the others, giving a small wave. Hajime skipped over with Shin and Mannen by his side, a smile on his face. He cleared his throat before opening his mouth to speak.

"Sasame and Kagome sitting in a-"

Sasame and I both turned a light shade of red and Sasame lunged, trying to cover Hajime's mouth. When he succeeded the chant was passed onto Mannen and he ran around, laughing.

"-tree! K-I-S"

"Stop right there!" I shouted and tackled him to the ground.

"-S-I-N-G!" Shin giggled and I tensed, slowly turning around.

"Not you too..." I whimpered and Himeno joined in with the chanting. Scowling, I covered her mouth with my ki that was, surprisingly, a lighter shade than before. The chanting stopped and they all looked at the glowing ki in my hand.

"...it's not... black..." Goh mumbled and a smile made its way onto my face.

"It's not black...!" I laughed. "It's not black!!!!" I let go of Mannen and jumped to my feet, ecstatic, and grabbed Hayate's hands in mine, ignoring the flash of light, and began to spin in circles. "I'm so happy I could kiss _You!!!!_" I exclaimed and Hayate scowled.

"Is that an insult?" he growled and I gave a mischievious grin.

"Are you not believing me, Hayate? Because I can show you just how serious I am."

"No, I'm good, thank you."

After noticing that I was holding his hands, I quickly let go of them and wiped them on his sleeve. "Ewwww, Hayate germs..."

"What are you doing? _You _were the one that touched _me!_"

"Wait a minute..." I gasped, grabbing his hand again. Confusion washed over me and my smile grew even wider, excited. Hayate yelped and jumped back, giving me a frustrated glare.

"What the hell was that?!" he yelled and I looked at my hand, thrilled.

"You felt it, didn't you?!" I asked quickly and he nodded, still confused. I looked at Sasame and he seemed glad as well.

"We're connected to her" he stated and Hayate blanched.

"I don't want to be connected to her!"

"If you're a Leafe Knight then its your responsibility to protect her, and being connected to her in some way makes it easier for you to do so" Sesshoumaru stated and I turned to look at him. He gave a quick glare to Mannen before continuing. "Emotions are passed through the bond, along with a sense of direction, which is why Sasame knew exactly where she was when Fenrir had taken her. It makes it easier overall with the protecting process."

"So Sasame's had this for a while, huh?" Hayate mused and Sasame nodded.

"About a month or so."

"Sesshoumaru?" I called and he looked at me. "How many more?"

"Two more" he replied.

"Can you sense any seeds?"

He nodded and I was about to ask him where they were when he spoke. "But they're too far away, and their located in dangerous areas. It would be best if we held off until they turned to demon larva."

"Why?"

"You might just fall into a highway and get hit by a car if you aren't careful."

"...oh..."

To Be Continued...


	20. Chapter 20

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

Just Trying to Forget the Pain

Chapter 20

firefox369

----Sasame----

Kagome took a day off of work to help create barriers in order to protect us from the DL whenever we found one, which was actually quite often. Although her ki didn't purify the demons, it hurt them and made them weaker. As more DL appeared, and as more were killed, Kagome's energy slowly became lighter and lighter until it was almost at it's original hue. The entire time I could feel Kagome's excitement coursing through me. I'm sure she felt mine, too, because she often gave me those addicting smiles of hers. Even Hayate was in a better mood than usual.

"Kagome, you should come over to my house some time, I'm sure you'd love it" Himeno suggested and Kagome hesitated, glancing around for Sesshoumaru only to find him asleep under a tree, hiding from the sun's hot rays. Mannen got a cruel smile on his face and was about to sneak up on the pup when Hayate grabbed him by the back of the collar and held him up to eye level.

"What do you think you're doing?" he questioned and Mannen laughed nervously.

"Nothing" he replied and Hayate gave him a warning glare before plopping him on the ground. Himeno looked at me expectantly, wanting and answer _now_ apparently.

---Kagome---

"Only if I can bring Sesshoumaru" I bargained and Himeno's eyes lit up in delight.

"I'd love to have him over! Can you come over tonight? I really want to introduce you to my family" she said quickly and I once again hesitated before slowly nodding. Himeno laughed and raced over to me, tackling me in a hug because of her glee. "Oh, we're going to ahve so much fun!!!"

I gave a nervous laugh, not sure if this was a good idea, but seeing the looks on the Knights' faces made me begin to feel horrible if I decided to ditch. The fact that _all_ of them looked like they wanted me to go made me sigh in defeat and all thoughts of skipping disappeared from my mind. Glancing at Himeno, I noticed that she was even _more_ hyper than usual, if that was possible, and was jumping and skipping the entire way as they walked me home, Sesshoumaru in my arms.

"Calm down, Himeno" I laughed and she just pouted as she looked at me.

"Why? This is the first time you've ever agreed to do anything with us so-"

"...us...?" I questioned slowly, not sure if I wanted to know.

'Well, the knights kind of have to watch over you, don't they? It's only natural that they would be there too."

"Tell me they get a different bedroom" I whined, not exactly liking the idea of sharing a room with so many males during a sleepover. The children I could handle, but the others? Hell no. Himeno's laugh told me all that I needed to know and I groaned. This was not the type of sleepover that I had agreed to.

"Don't worry, they'll keep their hands to themselves" she giggled and I gave her a skeptical look before glancing at Sasame. Why? I have no clue. Maybe it was the slight feeling of disappointment I got from him at Himeno's last statement? Yeah, that must've been it. I glared at him.

"Hentai" I whispered so softly that only he could hear and he looked away, trying to look innocent as a small blush crept onto his cheeks. I growled my distaste but sighed and nodded, waving my hand in another show of defeat.

"Fine, fine, I'll go... even _if_ I have to share a room with hentai knights." I made sure to glare at Sasame in warning before turning around and opening the gate to my home. Everyone looked at him, confused for a moment. That was until they saw the slight tint of pink on his face. Himeno smirked and Sasame glanced at her before disappearing from view.

"Hey!" Himeno called, knowing that he could hear her wherever he was. "Get back here you little-"

I shut the door to my house to see Sasame appear right in front of me and I bit back a scream of surprise, but jumped nonetheless. Sesshouamru yawned as he slowly opened his tired eyes, blinking a few times and rubbing the sleep out of them before cuddling closer, squirming in my arms in the process. His small, fluffy tail slipped off it's resting place on my arm and went limp, hanging down, occasoinally twitching in contentment.

"Yes?" I asked calmly, trying my best not to punch Sasame in the face for scaring the crap out of me. I would probably drop Sesshoumaru if I did.

"Just trying to hide from the others. It wouldn't do too much to go to Himeno's and I can't go to any public place in fear of someone seeing me. Some random house wouldn't do either" he explained and I slowly nodded in understanding. "You're the only one they wouldn't want to bother" he finished.

"Uh huh... get out."

"But-"

"Get out" I couldn't help but snarl in reaction as he took a step towards me. I saw Inuyasha in him for a split second and my heart clenched in pain. What was going on...? Why was I like this? I knew that he was nothing like Inuyasha. Sasame was Sasame, and no one else. He stepped back in surprise and Sesshoumaru looked up at me in confusion.

_"You felt his emotions, didn't you?" she cooed and I tensed, squeezing my eyes shut._

_"...I decided to look past that. I know that old emotions can't change, but new ones can grow..." I whispered and she smirked as she walked closer to me._

_"He doesn't love you Kagome, it's all fake. Do you know why he likes you? He sees me every time he looks in your eyes, because you're very similar to how I was back then. Just like Inuyasha saw Kikyo inside of you."_

"...leave..." I whispered softly and he looked at me worriedly. "...onegai..."

He looked even more worried, but decided to obey, and he was soon gone from my home. I slid down onto my butt after leaning against the door behind me and I buried my face in Sesshoumaru's hair. He hugged me, trying to comfort me when he smelled my tears in the air.

"Onee-chan..." he whimpered, "what's wrong...?"

"He doesn't love me" I replied softly and Sesshoumaru whimpered again. "...I don't love him... I don't love him...!" I tried desperately to make myself believe, but I gave up, knowing that how I felt would never be able to change. I loved Sasame.

---Later that day---

I was now completely healed from the incident earlier today, and as I happuily skipped towards Himeno's home, I noticed a strange aura coming from there. I quickly picked up my pace and arrived much earlier than they had expected. They didn't show their surprise, though, even though I felt it, and quickly invited me into the grounds of the estate. It was much larger than I imagined. The driveway was humongous, and it was surrounded by nature the entire way to the house, if not a field of cut grass, then trees, or a small creek.. Even a small man-made waterfall could be seen.

Sesshoumaru's grip on my hand tightened, and I glanced down at him to see him glaring at something in the distance. Curious, I walked towards the sillouhette and saw something that made me curse my curiosity. I dropped everything in my arms from shock, which was only a change of clothes, but the soft 'thump' was enough to alarm the person in front of me. I shook my head, not wanting to believe. Not wanting to see. My eyes filled with tears but I hid my pain in my expression and my heart. I forced a small smile on my lips as I cocked my head to the side. I was faintly aware of the sound of cracking glass.

"Hey, Sasame" I greeted, glancing at the woman beside him. Takako.

"Kagome, listen to me, it's not what it looks-" The same as Inuyasha...

"No, I'm sure it is what it looks like" I interrupted calmly. The glass shattered and I felt my heart bursting into a million pieces. "It's fine, continue."

"Onee-chan!" Sesshoumaru called and I turned to look at him. He was a few yards behind me, worry clearly written across his face. I smiled comfortingly, but the worry only grew on his face.

"I'm fine, come on sesshoumaru" I whispered, picking up my clothing and continuing my way to Himeno's home. I was immediately tackled in a hug and I forced a laugh as to not worry her. Himeno didn't know what had happened, so I couldn't let her worry. She didn't need to know.

"You're here so early!!" she exclaimed and I laughed again, plastering that smile on my face.

"Do you have a bathroom I can use? My water pipes are down so the plumber's getting it fixed for me right now."

"Oh, yeah, sure! It's just down that hall" she directed, pointing. "If you want, you can take a shower right now, too." I nodded, thanking her for her suggestion, and made my way down the hall and into the large bathroom that would have made me gasp in awe if it weren't for my mood. I turned the shower on, and placed a barrier around the room so no one could get in, and no one would be able to hear me. satisfied, I stepped inside of the filling tub and lowered down all the walls. My face contorted in pain and I let out a sorrowful scream, sobbing as I curled into the fetal position.

"I don't love him... I don't love him...! He never meant any of it... he's just like Inuyasha..." I whimpered.

_"Don't leave... please..."_

_His heart skipped a beat._

_"I won't..."_

_Th-thump_

_I felt my eyes shutting and I relaxed completely in his hold. I felt him sit on my bed and turn so that his back was against the wall. The tears stopped._

_Th-thump_

_"...I never will..." he whispered softly and I gave a small smile as I drifted off the rest of the way into sleep in his warm embrace._

"I hate you!!" I screamed, feeling the hot liquid streaming down my face. "I hate you...!"

An image of Takako in his arms as they kissed filled my mind and I screamed again, shaking my head. I didn't want to believe... I didn't want to...

"Don't do this to me... kami-sama, don't do this to me..." I began to try and pull myself together, trying to pick up the pieces of my shattered heart, but the glass cut me and I found myself beginning to lose hope, beginning to give up... "Why can't anyone see me for who I really am...?" I asked, the tears beginning to slow, then stop. "...why do I always love the ones that will never see me as _me_?" I sniffed before letting the pain take it's toll on me and I fell into the darkness that surrounded me after getting out of the tub, collapsing onto the tiled bathroom floor. The tub's water continued to run, and the barrier I had dropped the moment I fell unconcious.

---Sesshoumaru---

I knew something was wrong the moment that I could smell the salty stench of her tears again. I raced to the bathroom and pounded the door, calling her, but recieved no response from within. I began to panic and the next thing I knew, I was staring at her limp body on the ground, the remains of a shattered door beneath my feet. I raced over to her, not believing what was happening.

'No! It's not supposed to be like this! This isn't supposed to happen!!! This is just like okaa-san... just like back then...' I began to panic more when I thought that and I covered her in a towel before hugging her close to me, small arms and hands struggling to keep her up, whimpering the entire time. My tail crept in between my legs and I held her closer, beginning to cry. She wasn't dead, I knew that, but the state she was in reminded me of death so much that I couldn't help it.

'What if she does die? Who will take care of me? I don't want to be alone anymore...!'

"Onee-chan...!" I whined, "wake up, onee-chan!!! Onee-chan!!! ONEE-CHAN!!!!!"

"Kagome?!" Himeno exclaimed as she raced over and slowly took her from my grasp. I didn't want to let her go, but I knew that Himeno would be better for her right now, not me. The other knights began to appear and I snarled when the first one did, my anger taking over. I felt myself shifting into my dog form and I snarled at the Knight to show how displeased I was with him.

"Traitor!" I growled and Sasame looked at Kagome, worried. "You do not belong by her side..."

He took a step forward and I snarled again. He stepped back and I quieted. The other knights appeared and looked at me wearilly before taking a step forward. I let them all pass except for the first to arrive. Sasame. The other knights were obviously confused. I had the most faith in Sasame, yet I wouldn't let him pass?

"You are just as horrible as my half-breed brother" I growled and he gave me a confused look. "No... you are worse..."

There was a soft groan from behind me and I saw Kagome's eyes flutter open. Relieved, I changed back into my humanoid form and ran over to her, throwing myself at her in a hug as she sat up. She easily caught me and held me close, ignoring everyone else. Himeno had gotten her dressed before the other knights had arrived so Kagome stood up, me in her arms as she looked at me gratefully. Her legs suddenly failed her and she fell to her knees, making sure to keep me from dropping to the ground. She set me down, and looked up into my eyes. My eyes widened when all I saw was a broken heart. A heart so far gone that it has all but dust, drifting away with the wind.

"Gomen nasai..." she whispered before resting her head on my collarbone. Submission. I didn't want her to submit... not now... not in front of everyone else. "Gomen nasai..." I could hear the pain in her voice. It was dripping with regret. If I could hear it, I could only imagine what Sasame had heard. I looked back at him to see him looking away from the scene. I sneered at him, relishing in his world of hurt.

He deserved it.

"Let me explain..." he murmured and I bared my fangs in warning. Kagome simply ignored him and I shut my eyes, knowing that the fantasy I had of seeing what my life would have been like without my mother's death was just a fantasy. I felt my body change, along with my clothing as the grew with me, accomidating my larger body. I looked down at Kagome from my adult form and gently picked her up in my arms, walking past the knight of sound.

"Onegai... let me explain... a few minutes is all I ask..." he whispered and I glared at him.

"You're explanation can wait" I growled and he moved out of the way for me, watching me as I hopped out the window and ran back home.

---Kagome---

I was back at the bar, cheering people up for the first half hour or so before it was my turn to be shoved on stage again. I was becoming used to this, the daily routine that I'm being forced through. I was secretly dying inside, but because of the regulars that would rather die than see me give up, I had to look happy for them. I had to look strong, content... for them. Glancing at the clock, I noticed that it was time for me to go stage and as I was about to, someone grabbed me from behind and I looked to see Hart standing there, staring at me.

"the boss got you a changing room."

"For what?" I was confused now. Hart couldn't help but smirk.

"He wants you to dress up, like a real singer now."

I groaned but sighed, nodding, before following Hart into a room that had my name on it. Wow. I had my own private room now? I couldn't stop the smile that made it's way on to my lips before walking in and finding too many outfits to count. Hart patted my shoulder.

"The boss has taken a liking to you" he teased before walking out. My room was behind the stage, as I figured out, after I changed. I slowly walked onto the stage and the music I requested came into my ears, filling me with pain, but I opened my mouth and began to sing nonetheless. I couldn't disappoint the fans, after all.

_If you want to live, let live._

_If you want to go, let go._

_I'm not afraid to dream, to sleep, sleep forever._

_I don't need to touch the sky._

_I just want to feel that high,_

_And you refuse to lift me._

---Sasame---

I panted as I ran into the club that Kagome worked at, wanting to talk to her before she went on stage. My eyes widened when I saw her, taking in every single detail I could. She wore a white, long sleeved shirt. Somewhat. One sleeve was ripped off, revealing her shoulder. That sleeve was kept on by a black band that wrapped around her upper arm. The other sleeve was fully connected, but considerably shorter and clung to her arm, like the other. She wore a pair of faded, blue jeans, and I noticed that she had put on some make up as well. Not a lot, because it still looked fairly natural, but enough to draw attention to her sorrow-filled, dark, blue, eyes. I heard the first verse and I stared into her eyes, wondering what she would do if she saw me.

_Guess it wasn't real after all._

_Guess it wasn't real all along._

_If I fall and all is lost,_

_It's where I belong._

I shook my head in horror. What the hell was she singing? I began to make my towards the stage. I really nodded to talk to her now.

_If you want to live, let live._

_If you want to go, let go._

_I'm never gonna be your sweet, sweet surrender._

"Kagome..." I whispered, knowing I wouldn't be able to squeeze my way through any farther. I _really_ needed to talk to her!!!

_Guess it wasn't real after all._

_Guess it wasn't real all along._

_If I fall and all is lost,_

_No light to lead the way,_

_Remember that all alone is where I belong._

_In a dream,_

_Will you give your love to me?_

_Beg my broken heart to beat,_

_Save my life, change my mind._

_If I fall and all is lost._

_No light to lead the way._

_Remember that all alone is where I belong._

She began to back away from the crowd of people as she looked at them, searching for something, and our eyes met. Her eyes widened in horror and she shook her head. Her mouths formed a whispered "no" before she ran off the stage. I gritted my teeth before pushing through the crowd again, determined to get to her. I finally saw her racing into a room and I slowly made my way towards it, listening intently.

"You won't leave me, will you Sesshoumaru...?" Kagome asked softly. Sesshoumaru shook his head, taking her into a hug.

"Never."

"You're all I've got left..." she whispered and there was a soft thump. I swung the door open only to be met with a pair of angered, gold eyes.

"Sesshoumaru, let me through!" I panted and he stood there, staring me down.

"Step away, knight."

"No, I need to talk to her! What she saw, it wasn't what it looked like! I-" I stopped the moment I saw Kagome on the ground, shoulders slumped and a hollow look in her eyes. There was a picture in one hand and a lighter in the other as she stared. A flash of red caught my eyes and I knew that she was staring at a picture of Inuyasha.

"...Here I sit..." she whispered.

"on the ground...

will my heart

ever be found...?

Forced to live

forced to die

in the earth

I wish to lie...

Broken heart

shattered soul

neglected love

I'm no longer whole...

What I feel

it's ignored by others

my cries for help

like a flame, it smothers..."

She laughed bitterly, setting the picture aflame, tears coursing down her cheeks and splattered onto the ground below.

"goodbye..." she murmured before she disappeared in a flash of black light. Sesshoumaru was gone the moment the light faded, along with Kagome. However, there was a presence that made me begin to loathe myself even further that was only there for a split second.

Takako.

I walked over to where she was, the photo still burning on the ground, and my eyes widened. It wasn't a picture of Inuyasha she was burning. It was a picture of... Takako. Glancing at her table, I saw a piece of paper. Walking over to it, I picked it up and saw the neat words that were scribbled across it.

_Sasame,_

_I know you'll get this message so make sure to pass it on to the other Knights and Himeno for me. I'm through with working in groups, as it always ends up with me in the worst positions I could ever imagine to be stuck in. I've gone to fight Takako, and she knows this. I know what you wanted to say, I just refused to accept it, but Sasame... be happy. Don't turn into me and fall into the suffocating hold of the darkness like I have. The unspoken words that always flash through your mind have told me numerous times how you feel about me, and all I did was deny it. Gomen nasai, and... aisheteru, I guess._

_Sayonara... love,_

_Kagome_

I stared at the message for a few moments before it finally sunk in and I growled, trying desperately to search for her using our connection. I couldn't find her and I began to panic.

"Kagome...!" I hissed, taking the message and placing it in my pocket. "...koi..." I whispered softly, knowing now that she always pushed me away _because_ she loved me, not because she feared me. I would bring her back if it were the last thing I did. That was something that I would swear to do.


	21. Last Chapter

Just Trying to Forget the Pain

Last Chapter

firefox369

--Kagome--

I looked around at the darkness, thinking, planning, and searching for the woman that I had so easilly made fun of before when I had compared her to Naraku. She wanted to kill me to get the Shikon no Tama inside of me. I wanted to kill her so I would finally be able to live relax for more than a few hours, without having to worry about demon larva or crazy, energy-stealing, purple, butterflies. Sesshoumaru was by my side, using his better sense of smell and better eye sight to find her.

"Did you see her?" I asked and he slowly shook his head.

"No."

A suffocatingly large amount of tainted ki appeared to my left and I turned to face Fenrir, a scowl on my face. She was once a pretear, but what had caused her to change so drastically? Then again, I had almost followed the same path that she had if I hadn't met a certain someone. A certain... _Knight_ to be more precise. That look in her eyes I recognized all too well, and despite what she might think, I knew exactly what was going through her mind.

"Where are your precious Knights, Kagome?" we both stated at the same time and I smirked. She scowled. I knew her _way_ too well, even got the sneer and disgusted voice down, too. Maybe it was because I was a lot closer to being similar to her than we both thought...?

Nah.

"Not here, obviously" I stated, trying to annoy her and make her angry. Anger made you stronger, but anger also blinded your judgement.

"As I can so clearly see..." she murmured, summoning way too many demon larva for my tastes. With a wave of her hand, they all came crashing towards us and dodged them all with ease. Thatnk god Sesshoumaru had decided to train me again. If not, I most surely would have died by now. We easilly got rid of the demon larva with a lot of energy to spare, but somehow, I felt as if Fenrir had more. Perhaps it was because she had stored all the energy she stole from me? She really did take quite a lot.

Fenrir sighed with annoyance before sending a few more after us. These were obviously smaller, but much harder to fight. they were faster, and despite their size, very powerful if you got hit. I was lucky enough to figure that out with personal experience.

I hopped back onto my feet and hopped to the side, grazing the demon with my fingers just enough to purify it. I looked at my hands, grimacing. It was... _slimey_!!!

"If you are quite done with staring at your hand, I would appreciate it if you would pay more attention to your surroundings" Sesshoumaru grunted and I laughed in embarrassment before reaching out and purifying a demon behind him as I poked it with my pointer finger.

"Hai, hai" I sighed, continuing with the destruction of the _extremely_ low-level youkai.

When they were gone as well, Fenrir smirked and I knew that... well... _something_ wasn't right. A sphere of black ki formed in her hand before she shot it into the dark, inky blackness that was supposedly the sky. Then again, everything was black so I have no idea which direction was up and which was down.

A loud roar sounded and I screamed, covering my ears at the painful sound, I could only imagine what Sesshoumaru was feeling, but he apparently seemed unfazed. That confused me, but I knew it was a bad idea to rip him of his concentration on a fight during the middle of a battle. Who knows what types of painful things would be the effect of it.

"I believe we have a demon larva shaped as a dragon to worry about, Kagome" he stated monotonously and I glanced up to see that indeed, there was a dragon youkai hovering above us, inhaling as it's stomach and chest swelled with the air entering through it's open mouth.

"Can you kill it?" I squeaked and Sesshoumaru glanced at me.

"Possibly" was his short response. That did _so much_ to comfort me. Possibly? _Possibly?_ that was basically what Sesshoumaru said when he meant "no." Youkai and their damn pride.

"What about Fenrir?"

"It's not impossible for me to do so." _I'd have better chances with the dragon_ was basically what he meant. I groaned in defeat. This could not be happening. When did Sesshoumaru ever say anything short of "yes" when fighting an enemy?

Hey, Sesshoumaru, can you kill Inuyasha? I could just imagine the glare he would give me if I asked. Can you kill Naraku? Yes. Can you kill all the frick'n people in the entire world with one swipe of your sword? Yes. Yet he couldn't kill one, single, weak, measly little-

He grabbed me by my waist and jumped out of the way of the dragon's fiery breath. If he hadn't grabbed me, I would have been a pile of ashes by now. The dragon landed and I finally realized that it was about as large as a fifteen story apartment building. Okay, so maybe it wasn't so little, and maybe it wasn't so weak if the flames that it just spouted were indeed flames and not just some random light show. It was still just _one_, right?

Another roar was heard.

Okay, so it had two heads, it was still just _one dragon_.

It split into two.

Maybe not, but it was half the size, at least!

The two halves began to extend until the other half was formed. The supposedly 'half dragons' were once again a full dragons, just as large as the original.

...a dragon that could split into two and morph back into one at will, huh? how quaint... Fenrir had really outdone herself this time.

Both dragon's lunged and I laughed nervously before tapping Sesshoumaru's shoulder. He looked at me, obviously annoyed.

"Think fast" I commanded, running away from the two dragons and towards Fenrir. He looked like he was about to protest before the two dragons began to roar again, quickly grabbing his attention. A small scowl graced his features and I heard him mutter something under his breath that I thought he would never say.

"...oh shit."

--Sasame--

I couldn't believe it, she told me she loved me _after_ she disappears... as confusing as that may sound... but I wasn't about to let her just leave me. I wouldn't be able to handle it if she did. I would physically, but not mentally, and everyone knew that, even that stupid brat inuyoukai Sesshoumaru. But did she expect me not to go after her? If she did, what kind of an idiot was she? I knew I wouldn't be able to go alone, though, and that's why I'm here, standing in the office of Himeno's school, knowing that the others were watching over her. They saw me and walked into the school behind me.

So, here we were, seven Leafe Knights, standing in the now slightly cramped office of a school waiting for Himeno to pack her stuff and get her butt over here as fast as she could.

It only took her about ten minutes.

Ten minutes was too long for my tastes but I knew that I didn't show it on the outside other than an occasional nervous movement. The same went for Hayate.

When Himeno finally arrived, we left and went a safe distance away from the school.

"What happened, Sasame? Where's Kagome?" she asked and I looked at her before glancing at Hayate. He should have known, for he had a connection with her too. My gaze on him made him tense with uncertainty and discomfort. Good.

"Don't tell me that the bond thing is actually right. She isn't, is she?" he asked.

"She's gone. Fenrir took her."

"Which is why we're both about ready to pee our pants from fear?" he groaned and I couldn't help but smile at his description.

"Not quite that far along, but yes, that would be why we're both so restless and nervous" I replied. "Can you sense her?"

"No, can you?"

I sighed before slowly nodding. I had no idea how it was possible, though. she was in a _completely_ different dimension... a different _world_.

_"Sesshoumaru!!!"_ her voice echoed in my mind and I sighed, trying to hide my panic.

"The demon's down..."

Right as the words left my mouth, I began to think harder. How would I be able to get to Kagome and fenrir when the only place I would be able to go to would be the land that I came from? The only other place was when Shin used his...

An uncharacteristic smirk lifted the tips of my mouth.

Beyondios.

---Kagome---

I watched as Sesshoumaru was hit by one of the dragon's tail, smashing him into the ground as it did so. I was paralyzed with fear. I was certain even a taiyoukai would not be able to survive the force of that fall without being severely injured.

"Sesshoumaru!!" I screamed but he didn't move and I saw him turn into his younger form. He still did not move. I raced over to him and created a barrier around us, desperately hoping that flames would not be able to get through as I picked him up and gently cradled him in my arms.

"Onee-chan..." he mumbled weakly and I gently tightened my hold.

"Shh... I'll protect you. Sleep, Sesshoumaru. Everything will be alright."

He obeyed and his eyes fluttered closed. His breathing, although ragged, was evening out and I knew that he would be fine.

"My, my, dear miko. What is your next plan of action? You can't possibly expect to defeat both dragons and me without losing the child" Fenrir taunted. "Why not just give me the jewel?"

"Never!" I hissed. I would not allow it to enter her hands, even if it meant taking my own life in order to do so.

"Then die, and I'll take your soul before it leaves this world."

With a wave of her hands, both dragons lunged, mouths open wide, revealing their sharp, long, teeth and fangs. I reinforced the barrier, determined not to let them get me. They cried out in pain as they hit it, but the purified parts were immediately replaced as the cells worked furiously to replace the dead and missing ones. That one attack had drained me of much of my energy, and I knew that I wouldn't be able to last long. The dragons reared and began to dive at me again and once again, they hit the barrier and recoiled.

One of the dragons began to breathe in and I knew then that I wouldn't be able to survive this. Not without some major energy renewal. They were just too _strong._

The barrier suddenly broke as the second dragon hit it and was thrown back just as the first breathed its flame. I began to make my wish on the jewel as I squeezed my eyes shut but the pain never came, and the wish was never finished. There was a furious roar and I slowly cracked my eyes open to see Hajime in front of me, a wall of water keeping the flames at bay as they slowly died out. I couldn't believe it... they had actually found a way to come to me... and they actually came to protect me...

I slowly set Sesshoumaru down and struggled to my feet, determined to help them. After all, the fight had reallly just begun, hadn't it?

I was suddenly embraced from behind, white-sleeved arms wrapping around my waist and shoulders, and I looked back to see Sasame.

"You came..." I panted, vision going hazy from the amount of ki that I used.

"I couldn't let my koi just walk straight into the open arms of death without trying to prevent it, now, could I?" he whispered soothingly and I slowly smiled.

"No, I suppose not."

I turned around in his hold and tilted my head to the side as I stood on my toes and placed a loving kiss on his lips. He returned it, but only for a few moments before he gently pushed me behind him and used his control of sound to attack a dragon before it could breathe fire on us. Blood spurted from the back of it's throat and I took this chance to summon what little miko ki had recovered and aim it at the injured area. I succeeded and it roared in pain as it was purified from the inside out. I collapsed to my knees and Sasame spun to face me, a worried look in his eyes.

"Don't worry, I'll be fine! hurry up and go fight with the others. They need you more than me."

He looked skeptical but a yelp from Mannen quickly dismissed his doubt and he moved towards the remaining dragon. The other three adults were taking care of Fenrir. Or, attempting to, anyways...

They were failing miserably, just like the kids and Sasame couldn't defeat the remaining dragon. Of course they couldn't, it needed to be purified, not hacked to pieces. Sesshoumaru, who had re-awakened, used the beam from his tokijin and even that did nothing.

Hayate suddenly crashed into the ground and there was a flash of black light that enveloped him. He screamed in pain and when the light disappeared, he was lying on the ground on his side, panting and coughing and sweating. He was abnormally pale.

That's when I knew.

There was no hope of survival if no one wished on the jewel to be saved.

And that's when I knew.

I would 'die' to protect them.

I wished on the jewel and a bright flash of soft, pink light engulfed my body, much like how the dark light had engulfed Hayate. I felt myself growing dizzy as my soul was separated from my body. It wasn't painful like the time part of my soul was given to Kikyo. No, this was a gently tug on my heart that urged me to release my spirit, and I did. There were roars of pain that came from the dragon and I heard Fenrir's enraged shouts and cries. She would never get the jewel, and I had made sure of that. Among all of the noise, I opened my eyes for a few seconds to Sasame staring at me in horror.

"...no..." he whispered. I felt the ties being severed with him and I let a sad smile grace my lips. Then, I felt the ties with Hayate being cut, too, and a single tear dripped down my cheek and landed on the dark 'floor' below. But it didn't splatter. No. Instead, it hit with a small 'tink' and bounced a few times before slowly rolling to a stop.

"No!" he shouted as the light began to fade and the screams died away. The dragon had disappeared, along with Fenrir. Good, that was what I had wanted. My vision grew dark and I shut my eyes, knowing seeing them blank would only cause Sasame more pain than he needed. Everything slowly faded away but I felt my body slowly being set on the ground. I was aware of Sasame lifting me into his arms and holding me and I began to grow confused. Wasn't I supposed to be dead?

I guess being without a soul doesn't mean you die.

It's like sleeping, but never aging, and never needing anything to keep you alive but air.

"Don't do this to me..." he pleaded softly, "Not you too..."

_Sorry Sasame_. I thought to myself before falling into that dreamless sleep, waiting for that moment in time when I would wake up again.

---Sasame---

I picked Kagome up in my arms and stood, head lowered so my bangs covered my eyes. The others looked at me worriedly and I turned to face them, smiling. Hayate's worry disappeared from his face and he returned the smile with one of his own.

"Go on, Sasame" he stated and I nodded before turning around and leaving. I was aware of Sesshoumaru following me and glanced at him when he reached my side, his face void of all emotion. But his eyes were red.

"She'll wake up" I muttered stubbornly and he nodded curtly, not finding any reason for him to say anything unnecessary. A swirl of wind surrounded us both and we disappeared from everyone's view. Everyone eventually passed on and all that remained of our existence was a legend, a legend that seemed extremely unlikely to have ever happened in the eyes of other people.

---Normal---

"Ne, ojii-san!" a child cried and the figure of an old man turned towards the noise, what little hair left on his head swaying with his movement. The child tackled him to the ground, long black hair flailing behind him in a ponytail with a green ribbon..

"Hai, Shippo?" the old man asked and the boy snuggled closer to him, giggling.

"What story are you going to tell me this time?!"

"Well, I was thinking about telling you a story about something called the Leafe Knights. It's a very sad tale that doesn't have a complete ending. I still have yet to find out what happens at the end."

"But I want to know what happens at the end!" the child whined and the old man chuckled.

"You'll have to come up with your own ending then, won't you?" he mused and the child pouted but nodded. The old man sighed and began to tell the child the story, laughing inside at the expression on his face. He was aware of his son walking closer and taking a seat beside Shippo, also engrossed in the story. It had taken him a long time to come up with an accurate story to tell and this was the first time tellng it. His son had never heard it either.

"So, in the end, the priestess wished upon the jewel, asking for everyone's safety and the evil witch disappeared from the world, along with her summoned dragon, to never be seen again" he explained and the child grew confused.

"But what happened to everyone else?" he inquired.

"Well, you see Shippo, since the world was at peace once again, the knights grew old and died because of their age. The younger ones are probably still alive today."

"What about the pristess and the demon?"

"One of the knights, her lover-"

"Sasame" the child corrected and the olf man laughed before nodding.

"Yes, Sasame, took the soul-less priestess into his arms and disappeared, the demon beside him. They were also never seen again so nobody knows what happened to them. There is a belief that there is a forest guarded by a huge, white dog with blood-red eyes out in the middle of nowhere. There are rumors of people seeing a flash of white cloth and the soft sound of a male's voice, singing and talking to no one in particular, too."

"Will I be able to see the priestess?" the child asked excitedly and the old man smiled.

"Perhaps."

"Souta, it's time for your medicine" a nurse called and the old man turned to look at the young woman.

"Hai, hai."

"But I want to hear another-"

"Shippo" the child's father chided gently and Shippo pouted before turning towards his father.

"But-"

"It's time to go home. Say goodybe to grandpa Souta."

"Bye ojii-san" he mumbled before his father led him away, a small smile on his face.

_Kagome..._ the father thought sadly, thinking of the aunt he had never met. The aunt that had mysteriously disappeared.

The End...

Just so you ppls know, there is an alternate ending! I'm not sure whether I'm going to post it or not, but it's slightly more optimistic than this one.


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